Dark Humor Jokes Tagalog

Mature Content! When Valerie is kidnapped, in the late night by New York’s biggest drug lord and trillionaire for a crime committed by her twin sister. She isn’t prepared for the love drama, betrayal and love-hate situation that will come by being fancied, by a dangerous yet smokingly hot Donovan Castillo, a man who walks hand-in-hand with death! ~~~ Valerie Blackfield is an orphan, who dreams of living a simple life filled with love, and happy memories with the one she loves. But when trouble comes knocking at her doorstep because of her twin sister, all thoughts of living a happy life gets crushed at the interval of the big bad wolf, Donovan Castillo who drags her into his dangerous world. Donovan Castillo, is on the hunt to catch the woman who might be the reason why his step brother is lying in a vegetative state. But when he catches an innocent bunny instead of an assassin, he doesn't plan on becoming obsessed with the sister of his enemy. At first, it all started with a threat to kill her, but along the way, Donovan's cold heart was smitten by her innocent yet addicting aura, that would cause her death or the fall of his great empire. Forced into a marriage to tie her down with him, would marriage change Valerie's perspective of the man, who had taken everything and everyone she loved for his selfish interest? When the sins of his past come to play a vital role, would he set Valerie free of his dangerous entrapment to save her life, or would he do what he thinks is right and die alongside the love of his life? Let's read to find out! ~~~ A/N: Rated 18+. This book contains mature terms, read carefully!

Before the Callisto's became the alpha pack of Peskington, the Mazzeos, revered as the last azure pack, ruled over it. Then, in an ungodly massacre, the Mazzeos are displaced, and the Callisto's reigned as the head of the five families. As the last azure, Elyssa Mazzeo abandoned her family name, only returning years late to attend the Moon Ball where the alphas converge once a year, to finally get her revenge. But the goddess has other plans for her chosen. After her race through the Labyrinth, and torrents of revelations, she realizes she's a pawn in a game between the gods and the dark. When forced to pick a side, will the hunter become the hunted? Will she pursue her revenge or allow destiny to run its course?

Kendra is a party girl living her life to the fullest. When she is kidnapped by a sexy werewolf she is pulled into a DDLG relationship. Kendra tries hard to cope with her new circumstances, but the Alpha of the Blue Moon Pack has it out for her.

Nagising si Dana Montecarlo matapos ang limang taon na pagkakaratay sa ospital. She was under comatose, matapos niyang makaligtas mula sa isang malalang car accident. Sa kanyang paggising ay agad niyang nakita ng asawang si Garrett. Masaya si Dana na malaman na nakaligtas ang kanyang asawa mula sa aksidente, and he looks alive and well... Pero sa paglipas ng mga araw, napapansin niya ang malaking pagbabago sa kanyang asawa. Ang mga halik nito ay hindi na katulad ng dati, and he is acting aloof and distant towards her, as if she is a total stranger. Ano kaya ang nangyari sa kanyang asawa pagkatapos ng aksidente na kinasangkutan nila?

"Sabihin na lang natin na pagod na ako sa paglalaro at nais kung tigilan na ito? Gusto kong mapalapit sa iyo dahil gusto kita. Nais kong malaman kung pareho ba tayo ng gusto o mali lang ang interpretasyon ko sa kilos mo?" "Hindi, tama ka," pag-amin niya. "Pero nitong hapon lamang ay sinabi mo na ako ay isang komplikasyon na hindi mo kailangan." "Over-analyzing is second nature to me. It’s helps me more often than I care to count. Ngunit hindi sa pagkakataong ito." "Parang hindi naman ganoon iyon," masuri niyang sinabi. "Marahil ay narealized mo lamang na walang magandang patutunguhan ang pakikipagrelasyon sa akin." "I don’t care about the future. Ang tanging mahalaga lamang ay kung ano ang narito at ang ngayon. " Humakbang siya patungo sa kanya, pagkatapos ay isa pa, hanggang sa halos malanghap na niya ang halimuyak ng kanyang balat. “Ano ang masasabi mo, Lara?" he asked hoarsely. "Handa ka bang makipagsapalaran sa akin?"

"Mine." I heard as I felt two sharp fangs biting my neck. I didn't know that at that moment, I was CLAIMED by the ALPHA of DARKNESS. --- They called me cursed. They bullied me. Spat on me. Blamed me for every misfortune. Until one night, they killed my family and threw me into the cave that reeked of death. I thought I was alone. I thought I would die in the dark. But something was already there—watching, waiting, hungry. When my blood spilled, he came out of the shadows. His fangs sank deep into my neck, and with a voice that made my soul tremble, he whispered one word. “Mine.” Years later, I tried to escape my past. But at the university, three Alphas appeared. And the King of Alphas—the untouchable Campus King—looked at me with the same hunger. Because he was the monster in the darkness. And I was never meant to be free.

"Anong ginagawa mo?" sigaw ko nang tanggalin ng malaking lalaki ang engagement ring ko sa daliri ko. "Hindi!" napasigaw ako nang itinapon niya ang diamond ring. "Akin ka! Naiintindihan mo ba? Akin ka lang!" ang kanyang napakagandang berdeng mga mata ang bumungad sa akin. "Never! I reject..... " Hindi ko na natapos ang sinasabi ko, nakalapat ang bibig niya sa bibig ko, inaangkin ang labi ko sa isang matinding paghalik. Maayos ang buhay ni Alice, may magandang trabaho, at isang kahanga-hangang kasintahan. Bukod sa isang maliit na lihim niya, siya ay isang werewolf, at kontrolado niya ang buhay niya.Matapos mawala ang kanyang mga magulang sa isang malupit na pag-atake ay ipinadala siya sa malayo upang manirahan kasama ang kanyang tiyahin, isang keeper. Si Alice ay tinatawag na isang urban werewolf na walang balak na hanapin ang kanyang mate. Ngunit hindi nangyari ang mga bagay tulad ng inaasahan nang angkinin siya ng pinakagwapo, makapangyarihan at mapanganib na Alpha ng US bilang kanyang mate. Ang kanyang wolf ay nang-iinit ngunit binabalaan siya ng kanyang isipan laban sa bagay na iyon. Paano niya tatanggihan ang pagiging Luna niya?

(R-18)Story of a girl who lost everything in life. But only one thing left her sufferings. She wants nothing but want to find the biggest mystery of her life that change everything. When she is suffering, she met a person which change her life. In this world he gives her everything she wanted. Let see how can a human become the light of someone lost path? And how can both overcome their difficulties together? And live a happy life with each other after many years of tears. Follow me on Instagram to know more about my work: @shinecl17 (This work is unedited)

Orella Daria Maldini decided to marry Dante Laurenzo Ludovic after she found out that he had something to do with the incident that caused her brother's death. She also planned to take revenge and wanted to make Dante suffer until he finally died in her hands. During her revenge, she is assisted by a man who always wears a mask. Her revenge plan is always accompanied by enemy attacks that have targeted her. However, Dante always manages to help her, which makes their relationship even closer. Orella begins to doubt her revenge plan on Dante as she begins to fall in love with him. However, their relationship is interrupted by the arrival of Eliana Maria Nardo. She is Dante's ex and is obsessed with getting back together with him. She makes cunning plans to separate Dante and Orella, but all her plans fail. Instead, Orella realizes that she really loves Dante—until one day, a big secret is revealed. What is the big secret? So what about her revenge after Orella realizes how much she loves Dante?

Ang pagmamahal ng isang ina ay hindi masusukat ng ruler. Buhay ang mawawala ang magiging kapalit naman nito ang buhay ng nasa sinapupunan niya. Isang gagawin ang lahat para sa anak. Being a mother can be tough, but always remember in the eyes of your child, no one does it better than you. Even when her soul is tired, I will always find strength for her children. Motherhood is amazing. And then it is really hard. And then it is incredible. And then it is everything in between. So, hold onto the good, breathe through the bad, and welcome the wildest and most wonderful ride of our life. Ang pagmamahal ng isang anak sa magulang ay may hanganan kapag ang tiwalang pinagka-loob...nasira... Ang pangungulila ng isang anak sa magulang ay may mga tanungan na gustong masagot. A daughter's love is one of a father's true joys. The love of a daughter for her father is second to none. The mother was her role model before she even knew what that word was. The mother’s love has always been a sustaining force for our family, and one of the greatest joys is seeing her integrity, her compassion, her intelligence reflected in her children. Ang isang pagmamahal ng ama ay walang pinipiling panahon para makasama ang pamilya na gusto niyang mabuo. Fathers are the first friend you make and the last love of your life. A father's love is eternal and without end. The happiness of his, is their children. The highest honor the father could ever receive is being called father.