Dark Humor Jokes Tagalog

Astrid Naomi Wadler only loved one person. And that is Leviticus Galford. But after one unfortunate night she found out the real Leviticus Galford. Behind his handsome and innocent face there is hiding inside it. The man she adored and desire is a man who breaks the million hearts of the girls around him! But when she was about to forget Levi it was the time where the man always appear beside her...playing with her...tempting her...and trying to burn her. Will she ever survive the fire that Levi brought her? What if that fire slowly turned into something more precise?

Stefan Salvatore, the youngest grandson of the largest and most well-known conglomerate—Divina Salvatore of the Salvatore Group of Companies—was the only survivor of the family's car accident ten years ago. Divina devotes her entire attention to his grandson, Stefan, to ensure that he is capable of running the company and carrying on Salvatore's bloodline. Stefan, on the other hand, is opposed to the idea of marriage and prefers to live his life as a bachelor. However, an unexpected turn of events occurred when he awoke in his bed completely naked and with a girl on his arms, which was witnessed by her grandmother. With that, his single life came to an end, and he was forced to marry that girl.

Lumaki si Syrie sa isang mundong kakaiba sa kung ano siya. Nabuhay siya na nakapalibot sa kaniya ay mga bampira. May matitilos na pangil, mahahabang kuko at mapupulang mga mata. Kakaiba sa dapat nakikita niya. Kakaiba sa dapat mundong kinabibilangan niya. Labis iyong pinagtaka ni Syrie na pinagtapat naman sa kaniya ng mga kinikilala niyang magulang. Napulot daw siya ng mga ito sa gitna ng gubat. Inabandona raw siya. Iminulat ng mga magulang ni Syrie ang isip niya na ang mga taong lobo ay kalaban.    Napatunayan iyon ni Syrie nang masaksihan niya kung paano pinatay ng mga taong lobo ang kinikilala niyang mga magulang. Ang mga taong lobong kagaya niya ang kumitil sa mga magulang niya. At buo ang puso niyang ipaghiganti ang mga ito. Hahanapin niya ang mga pumatay sa kanila. Hahanapin niya ang mga taong lobong may ukit na buwan sa kanilang mga braso.    Pero paano kung matagpuan niya ang lalaking pumatay sa mga magulang niya pero huli na dahil mahal na niya ito? Makakaya kaya ni Syrie na patayin ang lalaking minamahal o paiiralin ang pagmamahal na bumuhay sa buo niyang pagkatao?

They say once you meet your mate, your life will change forever. For Dahlia, meeting her mate is her worst nightmare. Because she is already tangled in the sheets of the infamous gods, Alpha twin brothers, Hades and Valerian. And now Dahlia has to choose. Her mate, where sparks rush at every touch? Or one of the two brothers who had captured her heart since the beginning? Unfortunately, fate is as twisted as it is beautiful. When she saw the way Hades looked at his own mate, she ran. She ran into the arms of Tatum, her mate, and ultimately gave in to the bond she thought was best for her. But will she stay when he shows his true colors, shows just how toxic a mate bond can be? Will the Alpha brothers be there to mend her broken heart after she is left broken and bruised by her own fated mate? And, will they show her what it truly means to be mates? They say once you meet your mate, your life will be changed forever. For Dahlia, however, meeting her mate has been her worst nightmare. Because before that, she is already tangled in the sheets of the infamous Alpha twin brothers, Hades and Valerian, who want her and only her. Even after meeting their mates, their eyes are only set on her, and now Dahlia is caught in a dilemma where she has to choose. Unfortunately, fate is as twisted as it is beautiful. When she saw the way Hades looked at his own mate, she ran into the arms of Tatum, her mate, and ultimately gave in to the bond. But will she stay when he shows just how toxic a mate bond can be? Torn between Alphas, Dahlia finds herself torn between mates.

Isang normal na gabi lang sana ang lahat kay Paris Laurene, kung hindi lamang niya nasaksihan ang tumataginting na pagkabigo ni Theon, sa isang dalagang balak nitong ipakilala bilang girlfriend sa abuela nito. Last minute nang bigla nalang umayaw ang dalagang bitbit ni Theon kaya’t naiwan ito habang di malaman kung paano haharapin ang parating na Lola. Well look at that, even the hot, rich and devilishly handsome Theonnius Naverra got dump in front of her very eyes! May pag-asa pa ang Earth! Hindi maatim ni Paris na hayaan si Theon na humarap nang bigo sa abuela nitong dumating sa naturang tagpuan. kahit pa kating-kati na ang dila niyang budburan ito ng pang-aasar. Ngunit dahil isa siyang mabait, maganda at binibining may busilak na kalooban, nagpakilala siya bilang girlfriend ni Theon. “Relax, Theon. Magbi-break din naman tayo.” Nakaisip na si Paris ng plano upang malinis na matakasan nilang dalawa ni Theon ang ginawa nilang pagpapanggap na magkasintahan. Iyon ay ang gumawa ng paraan upang magbreak sila nang hindi nagdududa at nabibigla si Lola Celestina. “We just need to follow the right breakup formula.” aniya. “What?” “Heated arguments plus jealousy and misunderstanding minus communication and time, idagdag pa ang mga babae mo. That will surely equal to break up.” Okay na sana lahat. Ang problema maling equation ata ang nasusunod ni Paris. Imbes kasi na magkalabuan lang sila ay nahuhulog pa siya sa binata! Oo nga pala, hindi siya magaling sa Math!

Simple life was to be the most beautiful place around the corner of every individual's life. Both men and women dream of the most exciting journey. They dreamt to be in a place of perfection that was full of contentment and happiness. Sindy, the unconventional woman who used to see different things and creatures. Then one day, while she was working in her daily life, someone killed her sister and she used to see who it was. Next, upon the argument between her mother she was forced to find clues for her revenge. Dammier, Sylier, Adminicous and Xhander were there. The kings of every powerful house. They played the darkest hour of life symbolized by Violet, Blue, Red and Green. They used to follow rules and regulations to maintain their obligation. All of them have a different reason. They suffered alone and tied to the shackles of the chisel. And upon intertwining them something happened that changed everything. It becomes chaotic and all of them turn into decision making. While playing chaotic scenarios something that opened up a secret in the past that changed everyone. The questions that need to be answered: Who, What, When, Why and How? COPYRIGHTS © MXGCHEF PLAGIARISM IS A CRIME. Some words and scenes may not be suitable for young readers and yet read at our own risk.

I fell inlove with my same gender.. yes same gender but what makes my situation worse is that she is my Bestfriend. Takot akong masira ang pagkakaibigan namin kaya hanggat kaya ko ay tinago ko ang nararamdaman ko but my love for her never changed a bit.. Sa pagbabalik ko at kung kailan handa na kaming mahalin ang isa't isa ay siya namang dating ng trahedya na tuloyang sisira sa pagmamahalang matagal na naming tinago sa isa't isa. Will she choose to remember my existence or will choose to forget me and find a new love? My name is Shanaia Asher Mendez and here is my story..

"Have you ever seen an naked man before?" I asked as she steps into the shower. "No..." she shuddered. "Very good." I turned off the shower, took her cheek in my hand, and start kissing her delectable lips. She was moaning as her hand still clasps to mine, and her other hand awkwardly touched my slippery naked chest. ***** He was cursed by a sorceress to hell where he exhausts decades of his life crawling his way up until he becomes the king that rules the dark lands in the pit of hell. For hundreds of years, he longed to be human again, to breathe in the fresh air of the earth above. He was waiting until the right time, the right key that could set him free back above the pit of darkness. But he was not ready when that key turned to be a very beautiful innocent woman that was mated to him, the descendant of the sorceress herself. ******* From a very young age, she had been alone survival. Her parents had died in a tragic accident, according to the police report. But she knew it wasn't an accident, it was fate as her elders had explained to her days after the incident. Her elders also guided her all through her adolescent life, up until she reached adulthood. Then they unveiled her true destiny as they told her that she was to set the dark lord free. She was skeptical but mesmerized when she saw the handsome, arrogant, controlling lord of darkness. She was not ready when her elders told her that she was mated to him. ******** Will the innocence break down his arrogance? Will her bubbly personality crushed by his controlling attitude? Follow me and uncover the story of a man and woman from different worlds.

Sila'y pinag-isang dibdib ng kanilang masidhing pagnanasa— ang maghiganti at manubos para sa mga inosenteng buhay na isinangla kay kamatayan. Kapwa nanumpang palaging iingatan, poprotektahan, pahahalagahan, at mamahalin ang isa't isa mula sa araw na ito at sa mga susunod pang bukas, subalit ito'y hindi pangkaraniwang kwento ng romansa. Sila'y kapwa nanunumpang dudurugin, sasaktan, kasusuklaman, at kikitilin ang buhay ng isa't isa mula sa araw nang pagkakabunyag ng nakaraan at sa mga susunod pang bukas, hanggang si Kamatayan na mismo ang tumapos sa kanilang ugnayan. Bilang nag-iisang anak ng tanyag na mafia boss, lumaki si Quinn Amara Montejo sa pagkandili ng mga baril at patalim. Sa paghele ng karahasan at kalupitan, kanyang nasaksihan ang walang-awang pagbawi sa buhay ng kanyang mga minamahal. Ganid at uhaw sa dugo ang kaniyang kinalakihang mundo. Tila isang bombang nasa binggit ng pagsabog, rebelyon ang kanyang nakitang tanging susi upang makalaya mula sa anino ng kaniyang ama, ngunit agad itong natuldukan nang mag-aklas ang mga guhit sa kanyang palad. Ni hindi naligaw sa kanyang hinagap ang pagpapakasal, lalong hindi kay Gunther Zenith Dragoza, isang tanyag na business magnate na maraming sikretong itinatago. Lahat ay umaayon sa plano ng binata subalit kung siya'y ipinagkanulo't pinagtaksilan ng sariling puso, sino ang mananaig? Paghihiganti o pag-ibig? Dalawang pusong buong tapang na naglayag sa iisang sagradong tipanan. Sa bisig ng isat isa nga ba nila matatagpuan ang tahanang kanilang matagal na pinananabikan, o sila'y kapwa estrangherong dumaong lamang sa maling isla?

Buong akala ni Hope Vasquez ay siya na ang pinakamasuwerteng babae sa buong mundo nang pakasalan siya ni Dr. Isaac Monteverdi, ang lalaking pinapangarap niya simula pa noong bata pa lamang siya. Hindi lingid sa kaniyang kaalaman na ang dahilan lamang ng pagpapakasal ng lalaki sa kaniya ay para sundin nito ang kagustuhan ng kanilang mga magulang at para na rin takasan nito ang masakit na alaala sa dating kasintahan. Hope gave her all for Isaac para matutunan din siya nitong mahalin. She even gave up her glamorous career in show business and became the kind of wife every man dreams of. Subalit gumuho ang kaniyang pangarap na mamahalin din siya ng asawa nang biglang bumalik sa buhay nito si Angenette, his first love. Kung kailan nagsisimula niya nang makuha ang loob ni Isaac ay saka naman ito bumalik para bawiin ito sa kaniya. Despite of everything Isaac did that could ruin their marriage, Hope remained loyal to him. Handa siyang magpakatanga at tanggapin ang pagtataksil nito as long as na hindi siya iiwanan nito. Subalit isang trahedya ang nagpabago sa kaniyang pananaw at sa pag-ibig niya para rito na buong akala niya ay walang katapusan. She wanted revenge. Gagawin niya ang lahat para iparamdam dito ang sakit na pinaramdam nito sa kaniya. She's willing to risk everything para maisagawa ang paghihiganti niya kahit pa ibig sabihin n'on ay kailangan niyang gamitin si Zeke, ang best friend niya na totoong nagmamahal sa kaniya. Saan kaya hahantong ang paghihiganti niya?