emo dark humor jokes

Bosan dengan tingkah keluargaku yang menjadikan Ranti sebagai pembantu gratisan, aku pun memutuskan pergi dari rumah dan membawa istriku untuk memberikannya hak bahagia.

"From today onwards, I will take every decision of your life. What you will eat, where will you go, when will you speak, what you will wear it will be all as I wish. And if you dare to defy me then till now it must have been crystal clear to you how far I can go to keep my words," his voice unsympathetic and cold, causing a shiver down her spine. Out of fear she was not even able to raise her head and kept her eyes casted down. He lifted her head up with his forefinger, underneath her chin and stared directly into her mesmerizing hazel eyes. "Understood?" Her throat was parched and her mouth was dry. Her tongue felt heavy in her mouth. The seam of her lips was cracked and pasted with each other and she couldn't find enough courage in herself to say anything using her tongue, so she just nodded and casted down her eyes again. He raised her chin more now with his forefinger and thumb, indicating her to look in his eyes and she did so. "Understood?" He asked again and raised both his eyebrows, warning her. "Yy....ye..ss" she croaked out. Her eyes were widened with fear and hands were fisting the bedsheet. Her cheeks were imprinted with red finger marks. "Good. Now take of your clothes and fulfill your duty" he ordered. She only pleaded him with her eyes. Clearly, she didn't want her wedding night to turn out like this.

Reyna's life has been far from sunshine and roses. As the Alpha's daughter, at the age of 21, should have received her wolf by now. She was the only member of her pack without a wolf and had to endure constant bullying and heartache, which was made worse by her intended mate's rejection in favor of her step-sister. This life made her determined to leave, and so she hatched a daring plan to escape during the highly anticipated Hallowed Bond Ball, which was a night of celebration that marked one year after the end of the War of the Three Alpha Kings. She had no idea that destiny was about to throw her a curveball. Just as she was attempting to escape under the cover of darkness, a surprising twist of events suddenly takes place. The word 'mate' reverberates through the castle walls, spoken in not one, but three distinct voices. To her astonishment, Reyna finds herself bound to three mates. A wolfless mate to all three powerful Alpha Kings fresh from being at war with one another. With the fragile truce between the three Alphas threatened, Reyna's life is in danger from powerful families who would do anything to keep the peace after decades of war. Reyna stands at the center of a prophetic revelation, holding the key to something far greater than she could have ever imagined. But as soon as she learns why she was chosen, evil slowly starts closing in. *** “You're intoxicating, darling… I think we may have found something we're all addicted to..." My face reddens as I look at them, and for the first time in ages, I feel like I belong. The way they're looking at me with reverence and the desire I know is meant only for me… I feel like a Queen.

Claire is the adopted daughter of an Alpha with four sons. She is treated as a Queen by everyone but loved most by the second son, Nic. Nic believes he and Claire are mates. Her best friend Grace loves the eldest Liam. Liam is confused by his feelings and hides them. What happens when the moon goddess gets involed and a curse is revealed? Will these four end up with The Wrong Mate? Book Two of the Mate Series, Book One Alpha’s Daughter’s Mate, Book Three Blood Moon’s War, Book 4 (November 2022) Mates Against All Odds.

In the bustling city of New York, a notorious womanizer and underboss of the underworld, Scott Mancini, finds himself in an arranged marriage with Allegra Rossi, a sweet and spirited choir girl who has been raised with rigid religious values. Despite her captivating charm, Allegra's appearance is modest and old-fashioned, often dressed in layers that make her look like a wedding cake—but not in a delectable way. Her bold and assertive nature, however, irritates the egoistic Scott, especially when she shows no interest in him. Nevertheless, Scott has always been one to embrace challenges, and he realizes that wooing Allegra won't be an easy feat. As their wedding day nears, the question on everyone's lips remains - will Allegra be the one to finally tame Scott Mancini, or will she be consumed by the dark and dangerous world that he inhabits?

"I'm glad you're not my past, but I want you to be my present. And only you in the future until it last Zafy." Zafira Mejia is a run away seniorita of Rancho Mejia at ang nag-iisang anak nina Don at Donya Mejia. She was born with a golden spoon, at ultimo pagsalin ng tubig ay may gumagawa para sa kaniya. Nagbago ang lahat ng lumayas siya upang takasan ang sinasabi niyang "matandang hukluban na amoy lupa." Na dapat sana'y ipakakasal sa kaniya, na kahit sa panaginip ay hindi niya man lang kayang ilarawan ang mukha. Hanggang sa natagpuan niya na lang ang siriling nag aapply bilang isang kasambahay sa mansion ng napakagwapo ngunit ubod ng sungit na si Justine Cortes. Ang lalaking ni pagngiti ay hindi magawa. At halos isumpa ang lahat ng kaniyang ginagawa. Kaya kayang tumagal ng isang hacienderang seniorita ang maging yaya ng amoy baby at gwapo pero nuknukan ng sungit niyang alaga?

Alina Jones was working as an event coordinator who was temporarily transfered to the wedding planner department. New to her assigned job, she was easily swayed to do things outside of her job desciption until she realized that she is to be married to a crippled but handsome and attractive man. Unwillingly married she wonders what awaits her when just for one day her luck was stacked against her. The worst thing happened was being married to a person she never laid eyes before.

After finding out that her mate, Alpha Cillian cheated and impregnated another woman, Luna Mabel is shattered, torn, and doesn't think that there can ever be a chance between them again. Feeling remorseful and never meaning to hurt his mate, Alpha Cillian fights hard, desperately trying to win back the love of his life. Sadly for him, he fails to recognize his enemies on time. More secrets are revealed, and more hearts break, more conflicts come and go, but in the end, will love triumph over broken trust, or will the wounds of betrayal forever damage their once-perfect romance? In this gripping tale of love and redemption, prepare to be captivated by a story that explores the depths of human weakness and the power of second chances. Warning: This is a dark romance tale, and in some later parts of the book will contain dark scenes aimed to justify the point of the storyline. If triggered by dark scenes involving sexuality and rape, kindly desist from continuing. Thank you. Image credit: Freepik.com For more updates on my stories, follow my facebook page, Eyitee's library

Walaupun dijodohkan, Risma bersungguh-sungguh menjalani pernikahannya dengan Riswan. Dia berusaha melayani pria itu sebaik mungkin. Namun, sudah hampir setahun ini, Riswan belum juga mau menyentuh dirinya. Risma tak tenang meskipun sang suami selalu memperlakukannya dengan baik. Berbagai macam kecurigaan timbul di hati Risma. Apakah dia kurang menarik? Adakah kisah masa lalu yang belum terselesaikan? Atau ... lelaki itu memang tidak menginginkan kehadirannya?

Viona tak menyangka keputusannya untuk bersedia tinggal di rumah mertua, membuat ia terpuruk dalam permasalahan pelik. Ia terperangkap dalam sikap konyol dan nakal Dion. Hingga akhirya ia tenggelam dalam permasalahan berat yang mengancam keutuhan rumah-tangganya. Upaya Viona memperbaiki keadaan, membawa Viona pada satu fakta yang sangat mengejutkan. Sanggupkah Viona bertahan? Mengapa Dion terlalu berani mengganggu Viona yang merupakan adik iparnya sendiri? Siapa Dion sebenarnya? Selamat membaca