Food Jokes

Seventeen-year-old Nora Macie has spent her entire life surviving in the shadows of the Collins mansion. Her mother is the underpaid and mute housekeeper who raised Nora to stay silent, stay small, and stay invisible. Master Stephan Collins pays Nora’s tuition at Riverbrook High, a constant reminder that their lives belong to the family. Especially to Asher Collins, the arrogant heir who is expected to take over the Collins food empire. Nora obeys the rules she was raised with: do not look at Master Asher, do not speak to Master Asher, do not fall for Master Asher. His mother drilled them into her every month. She has always kept her distance from him, until one humiliating accident shatters her carefully controlled world. One night, she films a private sex tape meant for her eyes only. She tries to delete it, but her fingers slip, and the video is sent straight to Asher Collins, the guy who is also her stepbrother! She expects humiliation, exposure, and ruin. Instead, Asher watches it with hunger, curiosity, and a dangerous idea. When he discovers her hopeless crush on James Porter, the flawless leader of the Library Club, he offers a deal. He will transform her into someone unforgettable, someone every boy at Riverbrook High notices. Refuse, and he will tell his mother that the maid’s daughter is in love with him. The makeover ignites chaos. Rich boys notice her. James notices her. Damien Priest, Asher’s rival, notices her. And worst of all, Asher begins to want her too. The quiet maid’s daughter is suddenly the center of a war she never asked for—a war of obsession, jealousy, and temptation. And the boy who is supposed to help her might be the one who destroys her.

Kang Jae Woon is the youngest prosecutor in his department. With his handsome appearance, outstanding achievement, and powerful family background, he is being admired and envied at the same time by many people. One day, his best friend, Han Ryan is murdered by a serial killer and Jae Woon felt his world is crumbling down. Due to his excessive sadness, Jae Woon drowns himself in alcohol at his house, alone. He drunk and snacking food until his body suddenly convulsed in an allergic reaction. "Shit! Who the fuck put almonds in my snack?! I clearly remind the salesgirl to not put any almond in my baggage! Damn it! Where is my medicine?!" As he's groping around in agony, searching for his precious medicine, Jae Woon felt his body plopped on the bed as his consciousness faded and darkness is embracing his body. How miserable. To think I would die because of a stupid almond...Ryan will be laughing when he heard this. ------ "Wake up, you pig!" A harsh voice is jolted him away from his sleeping state. At the same time, his body is being drenched by a bucket of smelly water. "Since you're a pig, you didn't mind to bathe in poop, right?" Mocking waves of laughter are resounding in the dark, small room. Three boys and one girl are looking down at him with disgusted expressions plastered on their faces. One of the boys is holding an empty bucket. Jae Woon is dumbfounded. Wha...? Where is he? No, no, no. Actually, who are these pompous brats?! How dare they...Jae Woon suddenly felt that something is wrong with his body. He had difficulty in moving around and felt extremely sluggish. What is this?! Since when his slender and sturdy body changed into a piggy in just one night?!

Warning: This is the most painful Love Triangle you'll ever read! Ever since Cami left the family where his older brothers sold her, she's been wandering around the City for days. No food, no water, no shelter, it's good that it's raining that time, so she can drink somehow. No one intends to help her. She has been through all the hardship living alone, she's been bullied and mistreated by the people she knows. Until Dylan and Stan came to save her, offer her a shelter and all, so the two of them became her hero, Dylan offer her a shelter and care. At first, she didn't believe that Dylan would be good to her because of what she had gone through with other people, especially her own family. She became closer to Dylan, probably because they lived in the same roof. Dylan is a very kind person, gentle, caring, passionate and charming but grumpy sometimes. She already liked the young man. But she knew he was unlikely to like her, he was just nice to her because he was a good person. She always watched the young man. Dylan is quite close to Stan's sister Zaneah because Dylan is Zaneah's protector, She didn't know that Gabe, the prince charming of Crown University, was also watching her while she was watching Dylan. There isn't a day that Gabe doesn't tickle and irritate her. One day Dylan and her were together when he left her for Zaneah, sad and hurt her badly, Gabe suddenly came to offer her his comfort. From that day on, whenever she was sad, he just called Gabe, and he came immediately to comfort her. Will she choose the person she loves or choose the person who always there for her and willing to love her?

{SUPPORT = MOTIVATION = MORE UPDATES} Valery Hale ~ All I ever wanted was a comfortable life for me and my brother, Derek. With no parents, I had to work hard to put food on our table. Derek needs to go to school, and I need money for the never-ending bills. Just when life starts getting good, fate decides to throw in a box of scorpions. I can barely make ends meet every month, as if that isn’t hell enough. How am I supposed to make the CEO of a multibillion-dollar company fall in love with me? Did I mention he’s also an Alpha Lycan?   Nathaniel Kress ~ For generations, KressCo. has met the needs of The BloodFlame Pack. Being the next Alpha, I am to also take over as the CEO of the company, but my father won’t let me until I claim someone to replace my deceased Mate. I don’t believe in second-chance Mates and even if I did, not Valery. I should've rejected her from the start because now I can’t get her out of my head. If only I knew she wasn’t the innocent lamb she was so good at pretending to be... -- Jaden points the loaded gun at me. “Valery, you have three months to get the bastard to marry you. Succeed, and you’ll get your brother back in one piece. Fail.” My heart skips a beat at the click sound the gun makes in his hands. “Fail, and I’ll break every bone in his body, then feed him to my sharks.” He threatens with his hand outstretched to me. “It’s simple enough, so do we have a deal?” The Mafia Lord asks, his lips curving to form an evil grin. Like I have a choice. “Yes.” --

Blurb “Please, trust me Luke, I didn't poison your meal, I can't sign this divorce document” Sarah cried out with a pleading eyes. “Sign them now, or you won't like to see me in the next second” he fired, squeezing the pen into her hand. <<<<< Sarah and Luke love story was a kind all couples both young and old will live to imitate. But suddenly, Luke, who was an angel to Sarah, turns to be the demon she never knew the hatred and beat her to pulp as slight mistake. She thinks so hard of what might be wrong with him, yet she couldn't find until one when she came back from work to pick an urgent document only to see her husband and her best friend in her marital bed having sex and still got beaten for it by Luke. A life of slavery all the time, she decided to marry Luke due to the pain her manipulative stepmother had always caused her, she was happy she found a man who was ready to marry her, but then he turns to be the worst human to endure with, yet she stayed behind. Keila, her best friend who she tells her story now betrayed her, even moving in to leave with them. She was turned a slave in her husband's house while Keila made mockery of her, sometimes lies again her to Luke just to get Sarah beaten up. But what happened when Luke food was poisoned and Sarah was pointed to be the suspect? Luke decided to divorce her and move ahead with Keila life, will Sarah ever war to win him back, or will she leave? When she discovered she was pregnant, will she accept to give her baby out? All she sought was revenge and nothing more.

Everyday! Bryce Armstrong has bullied me for the last four years since I moved here in my ninth-grade year because ever since, I messed up his shoes! Well, it's a long story, but I ran into him on my first day and knocked all my food over his brand-new shoes. So ever since that incident, he started making my life a nightmare. Ever since that day, he hated me! So, one night, Williow goes to a party but needs to know whose house it is. But when her cousin Maryann tells her where they are going, Williow doesn't know whose house it is until she sees a familiar face on the wall of this house! Bryce Armstrong! The guy who hates her guts and he promised to make her life a living hell. What would happen if she woke up the following day with her face on a half-naked guy's chest? But what if the half-naked guy is no other than the guy who made his life mission in high school to make her life suffer, and he always told her he would enjoy it when he did? What would happen when willow grabs her shoes off the floor and slowly opens the door when she tries to walk out? Before she can do that, she hears something behind her. She gasped when she felt a hand wrapped around her waist and pulled back, and her back was on his hard stomach. "So, no kiss goodbye?" She heard his deep raspy chuckle behind her. She was caught! Now it's too late, and Her monster got her in his lair. The Story of The Girl Behind the Book! High School Bully Romance.

Tyler never wanted an Alpha, especially not someone like Landon Hayes. At Ridgecrest Academy, Landon is at the top of the food chain—dominant, arrogant, and used to getting everything he wants. But Tyler isn’t like the other Omegas who fall at his feet. Defiant and independent, he’s determined to finish his year and leave without ever being claimed. Landon has other plans. The moment Tyler caught Landon’s eye, it was game over. Tyler’s quiet defiance and refusal to submit ignite something in Landon he can’t ignore. For the first time, Landon is chasing someone who doesn’t want to be caught. At Ridgecrest, the rules are simple: the strongest Alpha gets what he wants. And Landon Hayes wants Tyler. *** “You—” he starts to say, but his voice catches. I see his pupils dilate, his lips parting as he tries to push back against what’s happening. I let the red flash in my eyes, just for a second, enough to show him who’s in control here. It’s not about scaring him—it’s about reminding him of the natural order of things. The way this has always been meant to go. “Submit,” I growl. He whines. It’s quiet, barely audible, but I hear it. His body betrays him for just a second, his knees wobbling as his head lowers, shoulders hunching in instinctual submission. His eyes flick away, and I can see it—the brief moment where his will cracks. And god, it’s intoxicating. That split second of submission is all I need to know that he’s mine. He might fight it, but his body knows. His scent tells me everything I need to know. It’s only a matter of time before he breaks completely, before he’s begging for it.

Mia Johnson's life has been filled with heartache and mistreatment, after her father leaves. Her life takes an unexpected turn when her mother poisons her and her father possesses the antidote to a poison that plagues her, but he remains distant, seemingly never to return. As Mia turns eighteen, her mother devises a shocking plan to secure a business , offering Mia's hand in marriage to a man named Carlos. Trapped and desperate, Mia's life seems destined for misery until a mysterious man enters her life. On a fateful night, a stranger quietly slips into Mia's room, offering food and concern for her well-being. Their chance encounter marks the beginning of a unique connection, one that will leave Mia questioning the true intentions of this enigmatic man named Dave. Days later, Mia meets the same handsome stranger in a shopping mall. She looked up at him. "You were the man in my room that night..." "Do you let men in your room at night? If you don't want visitors, don't skip your meals," Dave responds stubbornly. Mia discovers that Dave is adopted by her own biological father, a man of immense power and influence in the country. But their relationship takes an unexpected turn when Dave confesses his true feelings. "Big brother wants to you, Mia," Dave admits, leaving Mia shocked and confused. Struggling to come to terms with her emotions, Mia rejects the idea of romance with her "brother." However, Dave is determined to shed the brotherly label, longing to become her partner in love. “No… you are my brother and ten tears older than me…” she says while trembling. Dave takes a step towards her. “Who cares about being your brother? I want you… I want to make you mine, forever…”

On my birthday, I personally prepare 16 dishes. After setting up the candlelight, I open a bottle of red wine. I take a photo and send it to my husband, Eric Sinclair. "I'm working late tonight. Don't wait for me," he replies. I choose to believe him. But after midnight, I notice an Instagram story posted by Shirley Huxley, his secretary. Eric was there with her, dressed in the trench coat I once gave him. They sat side by side in the VIP seat of football stadium where my favorite Super Bowl take place. Entwined in a passionate embrace, they kissed beneath a sea of shimmering lights and the roar of thousands of fans. That game is the one I have always longed to experience with him. I look down at the cold food on the table. Eric's words keep ringing in my head. "I hate kissing." "Marriage is a partnership, not about love and kisses." Though we've been married for ten years, we've never shared a single kiss. Meanwhile, he's out there, kissing Shirley openly and passionately. Despite it all, not a single tear falls from my eyes. The next day, Eric settles into his chair, completely unfazed. "Return the gallery to Shelly," he commands. I nod quietly, saying nothing. Suddenly, Layla Sinclair, my daughter, comes running down the stairs and throws herself into Shirley's arms. "Aunt Shirley, you're my favorite. I don't like Mom!" In that instant, it hits me—the home I devoted my heart and soul to means nothing anymore. It doesn't matter that I've been married to Eric for a decade. Now, all I want is to find myself again. I decide to accept an invitation from the Parisoir School of Fashion Design. From this moment on, I won't wait for them to come home, and I won't look back.

When I opened my eyes, I found myself supposedly transmigrated to some ancient era. Every morning, before light touched the sky, someone would yank me out of bed to haul trash, chop wood, and do whatever filthiest job needed doing. Somehow, I'd become the lowest-ranked servant in the entire estate. The estate lord's son would climb onto my back and ride me around the courtyard like some pet he was proud to show off. Anyone in the household could hit me, kick me, or shove me aside, and not a single soul would speak up. Five years passed like that, so awful that I almost lost my mind, as if I were living in hell. Then one day, a group of servants cornered me. They didn't bother hiding their intention. The moment I saw their faces, I knew I was in trouble. Fists flew, boots landed, and everything blurred. Just before I passed out, I heard them whispering, "We're going to kill him if we keep this up." "Come on. This place only looks like some old noble estate. It's not an actual one. If he dies here, we're the ones who'll get dragged to court!" "Relax. Ms. Shaw will handle it. The idiot pissed off her childhood sweetheart. Getting tricked into this place is exactly what he deserves." Fear swallowed everything, and the world went dark. When I woke again, the lady of the house had conveniently "returned from visiting her family." The lord threw a grand celebration with tables full of food, wine flowing, and musicians playing like nothing had happened. I carried dishes into the banquet hall and lifted my head. Her face was the same as my wife's, Melissa Shaw. I set the final dish down, stepped closer, and in a voice only she could hear, asked, "Ma'am… are you enjoying your little game?"