Food Jokes Novels & Stories

Life’s so unfair, man. “What does a spoon matter when we’re literally stuck in the middle of the woods with invisible monsters, shady, bad men and whatever else creeps around here? Can you please, for once, use your brain and kick some sense in the gear?” He whisper-hisses, so red in the face, he reminds me of a tomato. “You could join a casting for vegetable commercials looking like this,” I remark and laugh at the brilliant joke my brain just reacted. Shit, am I not the funniest guy out there? Look at me - sense of humor, looks, body and an impressive spoon collection, I have it all, damn it. No wonder my little vixen couldn’t deny me.

“Jokes have owners, Grace! Do not try to crack one if you know you will do something contrary to what a joker can, and that is to pull a smile or erupt outbursts of laughter from people. That back there was not a joke at all, Grace!” I say that because if she was joining, that was a terrible one. She should know that she stinks at it.

“Hey there, I’m Marcel. Do you always look this uncomfortable at parties, or is it just tonight?” I couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m Sarah. And yeah, I guess clubs aren’t really my thing.” “Well, Sarah, you look like you could use a good time. How about a joke to lighten the mood?” I raised an eyebrow. “Alright, hit me.” Marcel leaned in a bit. “Why don’t scientists trust atoms?” I shrugged, smiling. “Why?” “Because they make up everything.” I laughed, genuinely amused. “That’s actually pretty good.”

I snorted before I coughed up some more smoke. "I wish you would." John laughed. "Lord, John, you shouldn't say shit like that." "Why not? You can't knock it until you try it." John winked at me and started to burst out laughing; he was dim. What would Pepper think if she heard her son talk like this? He better be glad it was just me that heard him. Not everyone would be as understanding when it came to nelly jokes. "Stop bumping your gums." I shook my head at him with a smile.

he replied with a big sigh. It was at least a good hour before the jokes settled down. It would've ended sooner, but someone downloaded an app to combine their photos to see what their children would look like and the jokes started all over again. Eventually, they got bored and moved on to other things; the occasional joke did come up, but it was mild in comparison to what they had to hear before. Krista and Cameron both made jokes of their own so they could at least be part of the joke and show it doesn't bother them.

I answered him back making him regret his joke. He knotted his brows as I uttered and shook his head. "You can never take my jokes, Can you? You are a boring man. Everyone in my agency loves my joke and burst into laughter, especially girls. But you my friend don't even try to smile at them." He started with his complaint first before he disclose the matter he was mentioning before. "So what? It's my choice whether I want to laugh or not. Plus your jokes are not funny. Girls laugh at your jokes cause your money makes them laugh. Otherwise, you would have been the king of bad jokes." I said, resting my ass on the maroon couch.

He said it in a childish tone. "Oh really, but I though your name was Caleb." Jazz replied playing along. "Oh no, I am not Caleb. He disturbs people who want to be left alone but ME, I am Mr. Laughter people enjoy my company." "Oh really?" "Yes." He said it continuing the same innocent tone in his voice. "Shall I tell you a joke?" "Please go on." "Once there was an old man who died at a very young age hahaha..." He ended his short joke with his own laughter

eat? "Then, the big fish said, 'I... like... to... eat... small... fish... that... talks... slowly.' "After that, the small fish said, 'Oh, no!'" Nobody made a sound after Stella told the joke. Stella also thought that it was kind of a bad joke. So, she coughed and said, "Is it not funny?" Vermont showed his support. "No, it's hilarious." However, Keegan said sarcastically, "Do you mean ridiculous?"

Bradley Fry, my CEO husband, loves bringing his friends home for meals the most. He claims that this makes them feel like an actual family. As they drink in the feast I've whipped up for everyone, one of Bradley's friends comments smilingly, "I knew that you were a virtuous one, Emily! Now this is how the legitimate wife should act!" My expression doesn't falter as I ask in a half-joking manner, "Oh? Does Bradley have a spoiled and pampered mistress by his side, then?" His friends are stunned by my question. A trace of panic crosses their eyes simultaneously. But Bradley just wraps an arm around my shoulders with a smile. "Don't listen to their nonsense, Emily. Who else is worthy as my

He laughed. "That means you must have forgotten about it, and that's disappointing." Citrus acted to be sad. "You should remember that night, you have to." "I never did that shit, bro. I don't do man stuff." "We can do that again, I'm pretty sure you'll remember it this time." He said and Denver rolled his eyes. "Jennifer is gonna have you dead in a second." He joked. "Then we're gonna have it all three of us." "Guys, come on. Geez." I couldn't hold the laughter anymore, and they were not looking like they'd stop. If I don't stop them any sooner, my ribs would probably be broken any minute from now.