Food Jokes

After being chosen by a horror game, I took over a food stall in a small town. A ghoul tried to eat me, his huge, bloody mouth a gaping maw, but I quickly shoved a focaccia sandwich into it. He chewed and then said, “Oh, forget it. With food to eat, I’ll kill her tomorrow.” The next day, I made delicious pierogies, then skewers and stews. All the ghouls who stopped by gave up on trying to kill me, focusing on eating instead. The audience watching me was shocked that I could survive all the way to the end with just my cooking.

My girlfriend Chloe Bennett's childhood buddy, Daniel Miller, binds himself to a transfer system. Everything he eats gets sent straight into my stomach. He creates a live stream channel and eats nonstop for 12 hours a day to rake in money. Meanwhile, I end up in the ER with acute pancreatitis. I try to explain everything to Chloe, but she just looks at me like I've lost my mind. "How could something that ridiculous exist? If food could magically transfer, nobody would starve in the world. You're just jealous he's making money from streaming." Afterward, Daniel's every live stream triggers another pancreatitis episode, sending me back to the ER until I'm barely holding on. I get tested, but the doctors can't figure out what's wrong. They even want to admit me to psych. Later, in a desperate bid to outdo another streamer, Daniel downs ten pounds of mashed potatoes at once. The overload destroys my spleen and stomach, causing massive internal bleeding that kills me. When I open my eyes again, I'm back on the day of Daniel's very first live stream. This time, I rush out and order 20 takeout dishes before him. "This time, I'm eating first."

I confirmed Vincent Lowe was cheating on me on the day of our third wedding anniversary. The dining table was filled with dishes, yet he barely touched his fork before heading out the door. "Where are you going?" I asked. His answer was unnervingly straightforward. "A friend's treating me to dinner. Cassidy Mason—you know her, right? It's a free meal. It'd be a waste not to accept." An hour later, however, I received a voice message from Cassidy. In the message, Vincent's voice was lighter and livelier—so different from how he ever sounded with me. "They say you should marry someone you can truly enjoy a meal with. I really regret meeting you so late. If only I had known you earlier, I would've married you instead." I listened in silence. Then, alone at the table, I finished every last bite of the meal I had prepared. Afterward, I left a divorce agreement behind.

Hidayah datangnya kapan saja dari mana saja. Seperti halnya yang terjadi pada keluarga Herlambang terutama pada putra bungsunya mendapat hidayah lewat seorang gadis muslimah jebolan pondok pesantren salaf putri tunggal sahabat Pak Herlambang yang hidupnya kurang beruntung. Ada drama membayar hutang, kekaguman, perjodohan, kenekatan, perdebatan alot, penolakan Nyonya Herlambang hingga akhirnya Nyonya Herlambang mendukung putranya melanjutkan perjodohan yang sudah direncanakan.

Freya Laurent returns to the Blackwood Pack after five years, eager to reunite with her adoptive family. But the moment Alpha Dane, the man who's been her protective brother since childhood sees her, his wolf claims her as his fated mate. ‎ ‎Caught between duty and desire, Dane fights his primal urges while Freya struggles with dreams and an inexplicable pull toward the one man she shouldn't want. When jealous warrior Selene allies with rival Alpha Viktor, their attacks awaken ancient powers within Freya. ‎ ‎She's not just human. She's the Moon Goddess's last descendant, and everyone wants her power. ‎ ‎Can love conquer blood? Or will destiny destroy them both?

For twelve years, Nyssa trained to kill the monster who destroyed her village. She never expected that monster to be her fated mate. Chained before his pack, she swears a deadly Blood Oath: slay Alpha Raiden before the next moon, or both their souls will shatter. Every assassination attempt only pulls them closer. Every touch sets her on fire. And every secret she uncovers proves the real villain isn’t Raiden at all. He was framed. Her whole life was built on a lie. Now the man she vowed to murder is the only one she can’t live without. And time is running out.

While inspecting the hotel owned by my family, I start to feel hungry after ordering some food at the hotel restaurant. Before the food is served, I munch on a small piece of bread roll for the time being. Suddenly, the lobby manager comes up to me and hands me a piece of paper. "Hello, sir. We do not allow outside food here. It has been 8 minutes and 30 seconds since you entered our restaurant. The total cost of your meal is 1,500 dollars. You'll be fined 1.28 million dollars." I am briefly stunned as I look at the piece of paper detailing the amount I should pay. Then, I take a picture of the piece of paper and send it to the group chat that has all the members of the board of directors. I tag my elder sister in the next message I send. "I've received a fine at the hotel owned by my family. Is this how you've increased the hotel's revenue?"

Gabrielle was in a toxic relationship until she found a true love on the streets on her way to buy food stuff

Clever has never thought he would end up like this: bathe and fed by a man who calls him Cutie, for Moon Goddess's sake,he is an Alpha! "How can I flee the horrible place? Seems no way! Er--" mumbling, he is being caressed by the man and here comes the food he hates most. "No more pet food!" What will an Alpha do when he has to stay in his wolf form and is mistaken a husky? "Come on, you little Cutie I'm sorry." "Don't call me Cutie." A man suddenly appears,saying so.

Life was like a long thread, and the knot in it was a new beginning. Three lives. Three stories. But one shared fate. Ethan Lopez's life unraveled when he was accused of murdering Kaylee Anderson. On the day he was inaugurated as the CEO of Lopez Food Company, the murder occurred in Dylan Gabriel's penthouse, The Opulent Height. As the police continued their investigation, Ethan found himself targeted again, this time for kidnapping. This marked the beginning of the downfall of Lopez Food Company, benefiting their rival, Delish Delight Company. All evidence and leads pointed to Ethan until a new name emerged in the case: Blair Anderson, a seemingly ordinary baker at Lopez Food Company. Disclamer: R18+ This story may contain strong language, expletives, and mature content for adult readers, including themes of violence. It is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real persons, businesses, places, or events is coincidental. This story is not intended to offend or defame any individual, entity, caste, community, race, religion, or to denigrate any institution or person, living or dead. Readers discretion is advised.