Novel & Cerita Fortune Teller Fortunes Funny

"I just told you a fortune without you paying a dime." "Bestie benefits." I replied and after a while of replaying her last statement in my head, I realized I didn't know what she spoke of. "Wait, what do you mean?" I asked. "Do you know how much people pay to a fortune teller?" She sulked. "I'm wasting my talent and it hurts!" I laughed. "Quit sulking, Ky. You're not anywhere close to being a fortune teller." I scolded her playfully.

"You can be professional for one more hour, can't you? We haven't even visited the fortune-teller." "I'll give you your fortune right now," he says, grazing my ear with his open mouth. "You're going to spend the rest of your life happy, loved. Well fucked and wanting for nothing. How does that sound?" My ability to breathe goes out the window. I can't seem to gather any oxygen into my lungs and my knees are beginning to wobble. There's an immense warmth inside of me that feels like happiness. Contentment. I'm afraid to move or speak for fear that it will burst.

We made contact with The Oracle, cautiously arranging a meeting in a secluded location. As we met with The Oracle, their face hidden behind a mask, we listened intently to the secrets they shared. They spoke of a hidden lair, a stronghold where the puppet masters orchestrated their plans and controlled the fate of countless lives. The Oracle provided us with detailed information, maps, and a warning of the dangers that awaited us.

And yet, nothing happened to her stomach. Just as everyone turned to look at me, I spoke quietly, "Run. Someone’s stomach is about to explode. "And everyone who has ever eaten fertility fortune cookies before… is going to die."

He continued adding fuel to the fire. "Let me tell you—I've handled countless fake heir cases like this, and these wealthy elites truly are the best at tormenting people. "When they come for you, they'll disfigure you and send you off to the brothels to be played with. You'll waste the rest of your days away there! They'll be here soon. Just you wait!" I curved my lips into a knowing smile. "Alright, I'll wait for them. But you two had better not run off!"

“You’re the jinx! I’ve always been lucky in my life. My mom had my fortune read and said that I would be rich and prosperous in the future. I’ll have burlap sacks full of money and a fortune of over a hundred million.” Josh grinned. “That fortune-teller is accurate. You’ll be rich and prosperous if you marry me. If you like keeping money in burlap sacks, I’ll buy two dozen sacks for you and take out all my savings so you can keep them in the sacks. You won’t just have a hundred million. You’ll have several billion.”

To prov‍e th‌at their trap was a joke,⁠ and that he was al‍ways two steps ahead. The trap had be‍en sprung‍. B‍ut the‍y hadn't caught the prey. The prey had come to admire the ba⁠it, and then vanish‌ed back into‌ the shadows, lea⁠ving beh‍ind a chi‍lling message: I see you. And you can't stop me⁠.

I was panicking with everything that was going on. “What sort of stupid joke is that?” The Alpha's eyes darkened. He was not happy with the gamble my father was playing. Whatever he thought he was doing was no longer funny at all. I had no words for him. “It was a funny one” he laughed. “My bad. It wouldn't happen again. I don't know you were going to be pissed.” Standing up he lowered his head. “Did I hurt your feelings by playing such jokes on you? You should forgive I was trying. To teach you something

"But I am saying that sometimes the moments that feel like absolute catastrophes are actually the universe redirecting you toward something better. You never know what comes next. That's the terrifying and beautiful thing about being alive." The man with the coffee-stained shirt smiled - genuinely smiled. "You know what? It's just a shirt. And I was having a terrible morning before this happened. At least now I have a story." He looked at the barista. "I'm Daniel, by the way. And I'm not upset. Accidents happen." The barista - whose name tag read "Sarah" - looked between Claire and the stranger with dawning wonder. "Did you really marry the guy you spilled coffee on?"

We cracked up, goofing off right in the street. Nothing beats bestie time. Too bad fun's always on a timer. Came home—and yep. More people had moved in. Jack's sister, Tara, was posted up on the couch in my pajamas, peeling an orange for her kid.