Funny Mom Jokes Dirty

"HHHEEYYY YALL IT'S YOUR FAVORITE GIRLS! We are back yall. We were pissed too, that we had to leave yall with that cliffhanger. But best believe somebody got a call about that . Anyway, we're back and on the Hunt for Shawna and Trixie. We know they're still out there alive, we just have to find them. But you already know that we have to deal with fake mated she-wolves, who just can't read the room. So, we have to deal with them hoes, aliens, and oh yea The Ocean God. I know yall thinking how the hell yall pissed off the Ocean God, but we will explain that later. Right now, buckle up, get your wine glasses, and make sure your phone cases are sturdy just in case you throw it. Now enjoy the emotional rollercoaster of The Hunt for Shawna and Trixie!

Warning : mature sexual contents, read at your own risk. "Where are you going? " his deep morning voice rumbled. There goes my plan for a quiet escape. My throat clogged up tight, I couldn't face him... I didn't want to Those intense orbs made me squirm internally, my state of undress not helping the situation. I swallowed hard and met his gaze squarely. "last night was a ..mistake ..a lustful fling .... It's over, you should leave " I said tonelessly, my face void of any of the emotions I felt inside. How he moved so swiftly I didn't know, but next I was pressed against his naked hard chest. "Is that what you think? " I didn't want to look into his gaze, but his voice compelled me to. "That's exactly what it is " I repeated. I followed the trail of his gaze down to his belt which lay carelessly the floor. The one he had used on me , in many ways so dirty and sinful. The corners of his lips twitched in a smirk that made my heart leaped at a furious pace. "You are so wrong about that, i'll fucking show you just how much! " he growled, grabbing a fist of my air, he feasted on my lips. It was supposed to be just one night, I was supposed to leave before he awoke. So how did one passionate night lead to such a consuming obsession that threatened to scorch me and scald me until there was nothing left. Find out in the story of Mel and Sebastian (this is a sequel to the bully's obsession) I recommend you read book one before this for better understanding.

The story of a relationship between school teenagers who have problems in the past. Evelina is a beautiful smart girl and many like her but she is difficult to fall in love, while Nox Cyril is a handsome man from an elite family so many like him but he has childhood scars They meet again, but Evelina didn't remember. Their relationship is getting more complicated, not only that she met three other men. Namely Lucas Aland is a famous teenage model, Frans Vessalius is a the talented man in IT, and Owen Blouse is a heir in the field of medicine no. 1 in the world. What will happen? Do they still harbor feelings? And also what happened to their past?

Steamy, dirty stories with a kinky, forbidden twist. Each story is about 20,000 words so sit back, grab some holy water and relax! It's time to sink in 11 deliciously dark and twisted love tales! Highly erotic and brimming with dark desires, don't say I didn't warn ya! Forbidden Temptations (Steamy Collections Erotica) Coach and Cheerleader Principal and Student Step-brother and Step-sister Teacher and Student Step-father and step-daughter Father’s best friend and daughter Professor and college student Secretary and Ceo Maid and master Younger boy and older woman Doctor and female student

After a totally disastrous marriage, she has decided to keep her heart locked away for the rest of her life from the most hurtful things that can ever come to her. To be precise, men. She has finally realised that it’s so stupid to rely on any man or bid her own happiness on them. Even if it can be tough to be a bread earner and a single mom at the same time, even if she feels lonely at times, she will never ever enter any romantic relationship anymore. There’ll only be one person she will love with her whole heart, her babies. She can do this, and she must do this, because she is an independent strong woman who is the owner of her own fate. However what happens when the man she has solely voted to be away from comes to her aid? He comes back and asks her to be his wife? “Marry me ex-wife” on his knees, he begs. “Sorry, ex-husband, I can’t.”

Lucille is beautiful, smart, kind, and rich. Unfortunately, she is also brokenhearted. Having her heart and whole life shattered to pieces, she vows never to fall in love again. But when love knocks on her door once more, in the form of two drop dead, panty-melting gorgeous men, Lucille decides that this time, she will be the ultimate playgirl. Japer, a playboy, finds it astonishing when a girl did not swoon at the sight of him. More so when she told him she only wants to be friends or if he wants, friends with benefits. What happens when the playboy falls in love and is now the one being played? Boo is a super powerful tycoon. He's rich beyond limits but despite all his power, like his name, he feels like a hollow lifeless ghost. A girl changes all this when she makes him see how fun life can be, especially because he has all the money in the world. But can money buy him her love?

((A/N)) If you haven't read "Lycan King" you should definitely read it for a better understanding of "Lycan Blood." or you can just read this book and go back and read "Lycan King" your choice.****************I follow closely behind Lucious through the dark forest, looking at his tensed back. "I was only helping. I know you're angry Lucious, but you can't go around doing whatever you want anymore. My father has laws in place for these types of things." If Lucious would've wiped that pack out, he would've had to answer to father for his crimes.Lucious turn around glaring at me. "Don't tell me what I can and cannot do! I don't give a fuck about your father nor his laws! He's not my fucking king!" He spits the words at me, before turning walking away.I let out a sigh, looking at his back as he disappears through the thick trees of the forest. He may not accept father as his king, but that doesn't mean father won't punish him for the laws he breaks.************************************** After all the killing and fighting, Lisa just wants for things to go back to the way they once were, but the peacefulness of her old life back in the human world is long gone. Lisa is now shoved into the world that she was always meant to be a part of. She's no longer in the human world, living by the human ways and laws. Here its killed or be killed. While Lisa fight for her respect amongst the wolves, Lucious is planning to get revenge for the death of his father and friends.

Aliyah Sanchez, a twenty-seven years old young independent author, after she managed to get out of her first marriage that almost ruined her life, decided to live the rest of her life caring for her happiness, which was her daughter. Giving love another chance was the last thing she would ever do, but that would only last until she met Jeffrey Cooper, a thirty-two years old bachelor and the CEO of a publishing company, who was hell-bent on winning the single mom's heart over. Will Aliyah ever give him a chance?

After a very public break-up between the university's 'it' couple, all eyes are on the heartbroken Quarterback, Caleb Briggs. His life had been laid out in front of him for as long as he can remember. After one drunken night with a dream girl, he wakes up alone and is determined to find her. Little does he know, she doesn't want to be found. The last thing that Violet wants is to draw in extra attention. It's bad enough that she's the football coach's daughter, but to be dragged down in the gossip mill as The Rebound? Not on her life. When she breaks her father's one rule to keep away from his team and sleeps with the school's quarterback, she is prepared for the consequences. That doesn't mean that she isn't planning on running from them for as long as possible.

Sylvain Wilde had been searching for his mate from the moment he shifted. All he wanted was to find his other half and live his happily ever after. Except, he didn't realize that his mate would be of a completely different species from him and that she would be an enemy he'd be willing to give his life for! _____________________________________________ Book 5 of the Mate Series! You have to read Books 1 - 4 to understand this one! Books listed inside!