Funny Self Quotes

So there I was, stuck in this dark Victorian mansion for a whole freaking century, thinking I'd never get out. Then, out of nowhere, these two gorgeous girls swoop in and rescue me! I couldn't believe it, and we instantly hit it off. They showed me a whole new world I'd only ever imagined, and I was all about living a normal human life.   But just when I thought things were looking up, this vampire named Vivaldi pops up out of thin air, grinning like a possessed Jack-o'-lantern. I mean, a name like Vivaldi is bound to give you the creeps, right? He claimed I had some ancient first blood running through my veins and demanded that I sign some crazy blood contract with him—the kind of deal that comes with some seriously freaky consequences.   Vivaldi was trying to sell me the idea that this blood contract was his only lifeline, the only way to save his skin from something worse than death. But I wasn't some clueless newborn vamp; I knew better than to just dive into something as serious as a blood contract. Those things come with some heavy consequences, and I wasn't about to sign up for that without a second thought.   The problem was, if I didn't go along with his messed-up plan, he promised to make my friends' lives a living hell—the very people I'd started to care about. I was trapped between a rock and a hard place. If I decided to team up with Vivaldi, I'd be keeping him around, which is far from ideal. But if I refused, my friends and the whole town of Shadowvale would be in serious danger.    It felt like I was caught in this impossible situation, like I was trying to choose between two rotten apples.

Normal na buhay ang kinagisnan ni Joel o mas kilala bilang si Wella sa Barangay Maligaya—ang baklang harot subalit hindi basta mahahablot. Iisa lang kasi ang ang tininibok ng kaniyang imaginary merlat. Iyon ay walang iba kundi si Hans, ang ultimate hunk basketball player tuwing liga sa kanilang baranggay.Subalit hanggang tingin na lang talaga siya not until makilala niya si Beki-God mother na nagbigay sa kaniya ng kahilingang gawin siyang babae. Natupad naman iyon at nahumaling nga sa kagandahan niya si Hans. Sino ba naman siya para tumanggi? Nagpakilala siya sa binata bilang si Cindy at niligawan siya ng binata. Subalit hanggang kailan niya itatago ang katotohanan sa lalaking nagugustuhan?

Cassandra Johnson is Pixie. Pixie is Cassandra Johnson. She's the same girl who's leading two extremely different lives. Nobody would suspect the school's nerd as Pixie. 'Cause Pixie's a street fighter badass and the nerd does not have a single badass bone in her body. The chances of people discovering this peculiar secret is close to none but of course this is where fate inserts the certified new boy into the equation and makes an exception for him. Warning: heavy flow of profanities ahead. - and tears - or so I've heard.

Winter is a rebellious 18-year-old werewolf who is destined to become the Luna Queen of the wolves. Her parents have arranged her marriage with another werewolf named Ryker, whom she has never met or knows anything about. Winter doesn't want to marry him; she feels she is too young to be married and wants the chance to find her true mate. Her two best friends, Elena the fairy and Lillie the witch, promise to help her escape her family. Elena was born without wings, something that has never happened in the fairy world, and Lillie struggles to control her powers. If she doesn't learn how to control them, they will be taken from her. Their friendship is forbidden by all their families. The story follows their friendship as they learn about their powers and try to protect each other from the dangers that lie ahead. Will Winter find her mate? Will Elena discover the secret behind why she doesn't have wings? Will Lillie ever gain control over her powers? And most importantly, will their forbidden friendship be able to withstand all the challenges it will face? Together with her friends, she defies expectations and embraces her destiny as not just a leader but as a fiercely independent woman who will shape her own fate.

Lucille is beautiful, smart, kind, and rich. Unfortunately, she is also brokenhearted. Having her heart and whole life shattered to pieces, she vows never to fall in love again. But when love knocks on her door once more, in the form of two drop dead, panty-melting gorgeous men, Lucille decides that this time, she will be the ultimate playgirl. Japer, a playboy, finds it astonishing when a girl did not swoon at the sight of him. More so when she told him she only wants to be friends or if he wants, friends with benefits. What happens when the playboy falls in love and is now the one being played? Boo is a super powerful tycoon. He's rich beyond limits but despite all his power, like his name, he feels like a hollow lifeless ghost. A girl changes all this when she makes him see how fun life can be, especially because he has all the money in the world. But can money buy him her love?

After a night of reckless indulgence, driven by the intoxicating allure of alcohol, her life began to unravel. She watched helplessly as everything she held dear - her lover, her family, her flourishing career - slipped away. Following her father's mysterious and untimely death, she transformed from a wealthy heiress into a humble rural dweller. Years later, returning to the bustling streets of New York with her two young children, she was determined to unearth the hidden truths of her past. Who was the enigmatic father of her children? What secrets surrounded her father's demise, and who was responsible for the downfall of their once-mighty family business? In her quest for justice, she confronted a world veiled in corporate conspiracies and personal vendettas. Yet, beneath the city's frenetic surface, a more profound darkness awaited. In the heart of this journey for truth and redemption, her two innocent children became her beacons of hope. Their laughter, innocence, and unwavering love provided her with the strength to face a world as unpredictable as it was unforgiving. Amidst the chaos of New York, her children were the anchors that kept her grounded in the face of adversity, offering the courage to confront a capricious world.

Belle Stefano, a transmigrator who comes from another world. She woke up one day on a different body. She lives her life leisurely not until she finds out that she’s inside the comic that she’s read and that she is the antagonist who will meet her end tragically by the male lead. Luke Andres Hendrick is cold and heartless. He doesn’t care about the people around him except when she finds Georjia Norjia and falls in love with her at first sight. Belle did her best to not get in the way of the male and female lead of the comic book but she slowly falls in love with the male lead. Will she confess her love for him or she will run away without telling the male lead how she feels?

He was born with a mask. The mask was a result of curse that was placed on his mother when he was in the womb. Due to this mask, he has neva been granted free movement and this make him a wicked King. Nobody has seen the king except those that are living in the Palace but they all known that he is a masked king. Only "her" can lift the curse and soften his wicked heart. She is a human with crazy personalities. But something seems to be wrong when she was chosen as the Alpha mate. Who on earth will ever imagine alpha Jayden's mate will be a mere human being. Whereas, they were born on the same day, the same place and the same time but fate had it's way in their lives. This is the story of Alpha Jayden's crazy mate

Out of her mundane life Ava sparked the interest of one of the celestial. Something she read from books and heard from stories but she chose to reject their existence. Will her personal vendetta cost her life or lead her to something better? A mere human who thought she was just caught in the crossfire among the gods. When in fact she was the root of it. 'Words are powerful because you wouldn't know who is listening, huh?' That's what she said on their first meeting. Still forcing herself not to believe even if the proof is right in front of her. His intent was to prove his innocence to her. Yet he entangled himself for a bigger mess, is it really? The mere spectator from before is now part of a dangerous game. His choices will determine not only his fate but of the two worlds and the entire humanity. The more he wanted to break free the more he gets drawn to her. An unexplained phenomenon he felt for the first time since he was created. 'You wouldn't know how it feels unless you go through the same ordeal.' He remembered what his friend told him and realized that he was eating his own words. He was willing to abandon everything just to be with her. Even if it meant being selfish for the first time. He is changing for the worse but can't let go of her now. Not when she already meant everything to him. When the hope of redemption seems impossible, a revelation is unleashed. More questions emerge instead of answers they needed. Will it become the cure or just another poison? What are they willing to sacrifice for their freedom and salvation? Do they even have that choice? Or would they cease to exist leaving no traces behind?

She's a young Christian of 24yrs who tragically lost her father at 10yrs. She's ambitious that's why she immigrated to America. Her ambitiousness doesn't only push her to immigrated, it also made her work for Declan. She's brave, innocent, sensitive, ambitious and focus that's why when confronted with a choice between her siblings financial safety and her believes she's lost monumentally. He's perfect, sexy as hell, Richer than the word rich and arrogant than the devil himself, with all this perfection in appearance he still has some vacuum, he isn't perfect as he needs others to believe, Declan was diagnosticated with erectile dyfunctioning at a very young age. What will happen when two opposite individuals meet? can two site of a coin really meet? How will they survive without intercourse?