Funny Texts Novels & Stories

Three hours after my engagement banquet ended, I was stuffed into a burlap sack and thrown straight into the ocean. By the time deep-sea divers found me, my body had swollen into something grotesque and barely recognizable. The police called my fiancé right away to come identify the remains, but he could not have sounded less interested. "So, she's dead. So what? I'll show up at the funeral when the time comes." Left with no choice, the police dialed the second starred contact in my phone. It was my own brother. He laughed so hard that he doubled over. "Dead? Last I checked, it's not April Fools'. Not a funny joke. And do me a favor. Tell Selene Corvin I couldn't care less about her corpse. Throw it back in the ocean to feed the fish. I don't care." He did not know that I did end up as fish food for a very long time. The moment my remains appeared on that massive screen, however, both my fiancé and my brother lost their minds.

This box set includes all the books in The FlirtChat series for your binge-reading pleasure. Each woman finds her happy ever after with men who cherish, and worship her in and out of the bedroom. Book 1 - Daily Sext Seven men. One for every day of the week. A story too sexy to pass up. Chicago University newspaper is going under. I need to save it. Everyone says sex sells, and what is sexier than a polyamorous relationship? One woman. Multiple men. Now that’s how you sell papers. Book 2 - Triple Sext I get a text. One so dirty it drives my mind and body wild. I have to respond. And as the texts get dirtier, I have to wonder…who is this guy? Or is it three guys? Book 3 - Quadruple Sext Four brothers in Vegas. A fantasy far beyond anything I’d ever imagined, but now that it was in my head, I knew that I’d never forget it. I couldn’t resist the urge to let them do all the things that they’d promised in their texts. They wanted me; but they didn’t know who I was. Yet they were about to find out. Book 4 - Naughty Sext Bianca Young and her dad tried to cross us. They wanted to take my family for fools, and now they’re going to find out what three jocks like us will do with her beautiful body. You’ll find plenty of steamy scenes in this collection and feisty heroines who fall in love with men who will do anything for the woman who’s the center of their world.

On the day I drive home from my business trip, I find out that my husband, Matthew Channing, has occupied my parking slot. His SUV is parked haphazardly between two parking slots, leaving me without any space to park my own car at all. I find it funny that Matthew is such a klutz when it comes to things like this. So, I take a video of the situation and upload it to the Internet. Little do I know that it will go viral shortly afterward. Thinking that everyone will laugh at Matthew with me, I'm surprised when I see the comment section. "Don't tell me you got tricked by your husband for real! It's obvious that he has a mistress at home with him right now! Once you reach home and call him to move his car, he'll know that you're back!" "Lady, leave the car be! What's more important right now is the mistress in your bed!" "Do not call your husband and tell him to move his car no matter what! Right now, you have to go home and catch him in the act!"

I need a wife. Now. It doesn’t have to do with love and living the good life. This is all about getting the money my billionaire father left to me. And I’m running out of time. But who proposes to a stranger after the first date? Me. That’s who. As if I have another choice. Luck is on my side though, and a beautiful model shows up in my office. Single? Gorgeous? Funny? All of the above. Our first date goes so well that I feel unsure about my decision to do this thing with her—you know, fake it. I put it off and decide to do it later, to ask for her help after we get to know each other better. But I like her more and more each time we meet, and eventually, offering her a ring isn’t for my dad’s money—it’s because I want her more than anything else in the world. Besides, who’s going to know if it’s fake or real? And does it really matter? Yeah. It does. To her…

Five years ago, Jessica made the ultimate sacrifice for the love of her life, Davis. When a horrific car accident left him on the brink of death, she didn't hesitate to donate her own kidney to save him. She worked herself to the bone, juggling multiple grueling jobs to fund his dream of studying overseas, believing they were building a future together. But when she discovered she was pregnant, she kept it a secret, refusing to let anything hold him back. She waited. Months turned into agonizing years of dead silence. Her texts went unanswered, her phone calls ignored, and his ruthless family eventually threw her out onto the streets with her beautiful daughter, Catherine. Now, Davis has returned—not as the loving man she saved, but as a cold-blooded billionaire CEO celebrating his grand opening and his engagement to a wealthy heiress, Valerie. Hired as a desperate waitress at his event just to afford her daughter’s medicine, Jessica accidentally crosses his path. Instead of a warm embrace, she is met with absolute ice. To protect his pristine status, Davis shoves her away, pretending she is a lunatic stranger while Valerie publicly humiliates her, shattering a glass over her bleeding head. As the elite crowd laughs, Marcus—the untouchable son of the richest man in the city—steps in. Wrapping her in his jacket, he vows to make Davis pay. Davis threw away a diamond, but Marcus is ready to claim his queen—and when the truth of the kidney and the secret baby comes to light, the billionaire's regret will be absolute.

Before entering the SAT venue, I suddenly realize that I can't find my admission ticket at all. That's when my rival, Sara Foster, texts me. "You're still dreaming of taking the exam, huh? Why don't you take a good look at what this is?" I see ripped pieces of my admission ticket floating on the water in the photo. I start trembling violently at the sight. Just as I'm about to ask Sara why she ruined my ticket, I see another text message from my childhood friend, Josh Hooper. "Remember when I told you to get into Calder College just so you could keep me company there? It's all a prank. I've given up on my guaranteed admission spot so that I can attend Westbrook University with Sara. "I was also the one who took your admission ticket away. I was worried that you might ruin my relationship with Sara by badgering us, so I've decided to make you repeat your senior year." That's when the exam bell rings. I can no longer hold myself together, so I slump to the ground in a fit of despair. The moment my vision blurs with tears, a live comment appears out of nowhere. "What are you crying for? Remember the guaranteed admission slot that Josh has given up on? According to the rules, it has been passed to the one ranked second, which is you!"

At my wedding with my childhood sweetheart, Zoe Sutherland, I see live comments in front of my eyes all of a sudden. "This is so funny! The male supporting lead doesn't even know that the bride is a fake one! The actual female lead, Zoe, is actually keeping the male lead company in the hospital!" "It doesn't matter who the bride is! The female lead just wants to get married for the sake of her company's funds! After all, this story is about childhood sweetheart losing to the true love who's come out of nowhere!" "The female lead will end up screwing the male supporting lead's life over. Jeez, now I feel a little bad for him." Concealing the shock in my eyes, I go through the rest of the wedding while pretending to be kept in the dark about the truth. I don't want to become the stepping stone that will tie the two main leads together as the cannon fodder who dies a horrible death. Since Zoe doesn't want to marry me at all, I might as well marry the fake bride for real.

Sasha was beautiful, kind, strong—and wickedly funny—until the night everything was taken from her. She watched helplessly as her family and pack were slaughtered by their enemies, the Shadowmoon pack. Her father, the Alpha. Her mother, the Luna. Her home, the Whitemoon pack—gone in blood and fire. With nothing left but rage and grief, Sasha makes a vow: she will avenge her family, even if it means turning her back on pack life and becoming a rogue. Damien is the Alpha Prime—the Alpha of all Alphas. Cold, ruthless, and unforgiving, he rules the Nightstone pack, the strongest pack in existence. Known for his merciless treatment of rogues and trespassers, Damien is feared across all territories. At twenty-five, he remains mateless—an anomaly in the werewolf world. Many believe the Moon Goddess has spared any wolf from being bound to such a heartless Alpha… or so they think. Two broken souls. One ruthless destiny. What happens when a vengeful rogue crosses paths with the most dangerous Alpha alive? And what twisted fate has the Moon Goddess planned when enemies, power, and passion collide?

Valentine Rossi knew that great love existed as he'd seen it first hand with his parents. But he never imagined that kind of life was for him. Life was work and while he enjoyed it and the finer things in it, he never reveled in it. Not until he met them. Years ago Adira learned not to trust anyone - the hard way. Now she was a successful photographer getting ready to open up her studio. Though her professional life had taken off, her personal life was stagnate. Her benefactor, Gio Rossi, encourages her to to break out of her shell and start living life so she begins modeling under her middle name -Alexandria. As both careers are really getting underway, she gets drawn again and again to Valentine as circumstances - and Gio- throw them together. Valentine enjoys the quiet and shy Adira, but is drawn like a moth to a flame to the passionate and funny Alexandria. How long can Adira hold back the truth that they are one and the same? While he's trying to show her how to trust she's the one breaking it. What happens when the truth is revealed?

Elsie Miller, just an ordinary girl that lived in ordinary life. Her life turned chaos when she accidentally bumped into a little girl that attached to her immediately after the incident.Dexter Anderson, the mafia king that lost his family and it turned him to a cold hearted, ruthless and heartless mafia-broken mafia. The only family left was his niece, Andrea Smith. He devoted all his love to his niece and willing to do anything to create a smile on her face and she was the cause he trampled into Elsie's world."You can't reject me. Once I decided what I want, no one can say no to me and you are included. I will make sure you come to me and say yes to my face. Mark my words.”"Haha. Very funny mister whatever you are. Let's see how you are going to make me say yes!”"Well, challenge accepted.” He cut off the line afterwards without giving me chance to argue back. Arrogant and rude. Now, it convinced me more that this was the right decision ever for rejected his offer.