Here I Am Yesung

Separated by fate, haunted by the past-- that's how they live. Until they meet again; they built hatred, showed agony, betrayed friends, wanted to be loved and learned how to sacrifice one's happiness. Remember those nights that I've been disturbing you, it's because I can't say what I need to say. Remember the time that I didn't disturb you; I've been holding so much, hoping that you'd be the one to call me first- and you did. Every time I hurt your feelings, I'm hurting too. I- I just don't know how to tell you the exact words, so I keep on annoying you. I'm sorry for all the troubles that I have caused- "I know," I said and I hug him. I can sense the same pain as what he is in my dream. Confessing is not bad. I'm just overwhelmed kasi I feel the same. "I like you too, Alex. I don't know how, I don't know why but that's how I felt. I hate you harassing and annoying me but I missed it when you don't!" I smiled. There fate is twisted.

My fate was sealed the moment I stepped inside that school. A simple sentence, seven measly words that put a target on my back, was all it took to turn three years of my life into a nightmare. Savaş Ewald became my tormentor and my nemesis without knowing a thing about me… or did he? How was I supposed to know, when I didn’t have a single memory of my past and no one willing to tell me anything? I need Savaş in order to find out about my past, but he doesn't play by the rules. He trades answers for kisses, clues for pieces of myself, but how much of myself am I willing to give him in order to find out the truth? The closer I get to finding out who I am, the more I realize Savaş Ewald will be my destruction.

“Here's the deal. Do that lawyer stuff that you do. Try to send me to jail.” “What?” I blinked. “I'm giving you a year, but in my territory. I'm not sending you back to the U.S, so better get used to Italy like you once lived.” “Excuse-” “But you'll have everything. Every resource. Impress me, show me why you're a top lawyer and get me locked up. Prove to everyone that I killed your parents.” “I'll send you to jail, even if it's the last thing I do, Roman. You're trying to ruin my life again, but this time I won't let you. You're finished.” “Now, the condition.” My eyes widened. Now a condition? “If you don't succeed, you won't ever have an opinion. You'll be my plaything, my pet, my personal slave, my cum bucket. You'll be whatever I want you to be, do you understand?” I felt instant chills ripple through me. “So that's what you want? To control me after killing my parents?” “Yes, exactly that. I want to humiliate you so badly, so better impress me and send me to jail, Gianna. Better do it.” His voice was thick with warning. No matter how much I desire him, I'll make sure he rots in jail. …… We don't always get what we want, Gianna. He killed her parents and she managed to escape the house fire. Years later and this invincible Mafia don gets arrested in the United States, and she's the top lawyer in charge of his case? Hmm, I wonder what happened next.

I no longer recognize myself. Not recognizing who I have turned to. Maybe it was meant to be this way. I don’t know how within the space of five years I and Noah turned into something that was never in my imagination. We turned to strangers. At this time four years ago, we were the newest couple, the Hollywood upcoming celebrities that everyone was rooting for, our relationship was the envy of the whole Hollywood… then everything changed. Then I threw it all away… even though I knew that he was ’it’ for me. I got greedy. I tried to match up his fame which was silly. You can’t compare a god and a prodigy. I was a prodigy but Noah…. He was a god.

Everyone said my good looks were what saved me from my family's downfall. It was how I managed to become a Donna. I was the only one who knew why he had to compromise to marry me. Xavier Whitmore, the tall and handsome Don, was unable to have physical relationships with a woman. When I shyly took off the gown on our wedding night, he sat in his chair and lit a cigarette before remarking in an icy voice, "I'm allergic to women. That said, you have my word that you will be the only woman in my life." He kept his promise. Though he never so much as touched me in the five years of our marriage, he provided me with a life of luxury and wealth. Although it was merely a title, being his only woman brought me happiness. Everything changed on the day my men and I were ambushed by a rival mafia family. We barely made it out alive. When I returned home, I found him locked in a tight embrace with his widowed sister-in-law, Alice Ortega. "Alice, I won't let you remarry. If you do, I'll make sure that man dies a thousand deaths." I scoffed. It wasn't so much that he couldn't handle being physical with a woman. It was simply that he could not be physical with anyone but her. In that case, she could have the pleasure of being the Donna.

I was in a temporary shock from an allergic reaction. The two guys I had grown up with didn't even look my way. One of them was busy helping Vivian Byrd carry a pile of gifts, while the other was snapping pictures of her at some popular social media spot. It was a stranger passing by who called an ambulance and got me to the hospital, saving my life. The next day, Vivian called, her tone almost smug. "Trish, Zeke and Hendrick were so exhausted after shopping with me yesterday. I heard you threw a tantrum and ended up in the hospital. Should I come visit you?" I simply replied, "No need." Zeke Benson and Hendrick Peay were my childhood friends. They once treated me like I was everything to them—promising to pluck the moon and stars from the sky and to protect me forever. But ever since Vivian came into the picture, their world no longer revolved around me. I thought for a moment and then dialed my mother's number. "Mom, I'll accept the marriage arrangement."

For three years, I was his hidden Omega mate.I fought for him. I built his pack. I became his top warrior.But on our third anniversary, he chose a noble lady for power… and announced their marriage. I burned every gift.Awakened my royal blood.Broke the mate bond he thought he owned. I will never be your secret.Never your shadow.Never your mistress. I reject you, Alpha.This is my revenge.

Gabriel Steele was the most disciplined Alpha in the northern territories. A man who ruled his pack by order, law, and absolute authority. Which was exactly why our mating was a disaster. Last life, when my father handed me the Steele Marking Contract, I signed it without hesitation. I thought becoming Luna meant belonging somewhere. Instead, I spent years being laughed at. At pack galas, noble she-wolves whispered behind my back. “Wait—that woman with the green hair and the tiny skirt is our Luna?” “She looks like she walked straight out of a nightclub.” “No discipline, no manners… how embarrassing for the pack.” Cassian didn’t defend me； “Forgive her. She still has much to learn about pack discipline.” Discipline? Like I was some unruly wolf that needed breaking. So I buried my claws, silenced my instincts, and lived inside his laws— until the wolf inside me withered away. When I opened my eyes again— I was back at the moment the mating contract was placed before me. This time, I wrote another name on the contract. Amelia. She can have the disciplined Alpha. As for me— I’d rather be a wild she-wolf than anyone’s perfect Luna. But the moment Gabriel realized the bride wasn’t me—The Alpha who lived by iron law Broke every rule he had ever sworn to follow.

I loved Stella for five years, and we were even engaged. However, she never helped when my grandfather was dying, all because the adopted son of my family suggested that she should use the opportunity to put me through adversity—so that I would toughen up. After my grandfather died helplessly, I toughened up just as she hoped for, no longer relying on her for everything. Naturally, I no longer loved her anymore either.

They say that your past is never really left in your past. I used to think that was dumb until I experienced it. Four years ago, I met the Devil. He gave me a chance to flee from him but I refused and ended up shooting him. Unfortunately for me, he returned four years later to claim me as his wife and drag me to Hell. He's going to make sure I pay for shooting him. He's going to punish me in the worst ways possible. He has promised to make me beg for mercy he'll never grant me. But then, he's not the only one hellbent on making my life a living Hell. There's another person causing havoc from the shadows. I would have to choose eventually- be with the Devil I know or side with the Devil I do not know.