Hilarious Funny Short Stories Novels & Stories

I experience a short reprieve as shorter brown haired man shoves him unconfidently out of the way. I’m very grateful, I must say, that this cock is quite a bit wider but far shorter at maybe only 4 inches. This little man couldn’t cover me in filth like the previous 7 inch cock, and I can’t help but beg for them to please, please destroy my body; to use me the way they would a streetwalker, a WHORE!

“That’s not part of the game.” “I guess that depends on what you are planning on dishing out…I’m not the one smoking the weed, remember. If I was, you wouldn’t have to worry, because I wouldn’t be able…” “Maybe you should have a couple tokes and make us both real happy,” Carol said, and then started laughing , quickly followed by Debbie breaking into rolls of laughter. “You guys are hilarious…totally a gaff.” “We’re not done with you…let’s see what you got…oh yeah, we see what you got,” Carol challenged, again breaking them up.

He asks while pulling down his pants. "I don't know. Let's ask my friend Zara." While they look at me in confusion, I quickly shift into my gorilla. Zara roars in the man's face, and I squeal with laughter when I see the urine running down his leg. The other men are too frozen to move. Zara reaches out, grabs the man's penis, and rips it off, throwing it into the water. Now, there is blood mixed with the urine. He falls to the ground, and Zara picks him up by the neck and snaps it like a twig before throwing him overboard with his penis.

“He’s so refreshing!” Auntie asked Finn to sing for them. He stood up, cleared his throat, and belted a terrible edition and version of “Can’t Help Falling in Love” soo off-key and, dramatic, his arms spread wide like he was on Broadway. Halfway through, he forgot the words and started making them up: “Wise men say… only fools rush in… but I can’t help… falling in love with your daughter… and her excellent taste in lasagna…” The table erupted in laughter, even Dad cracked a smile.

They started competing right there, throwing dumb jokes and teasing at me like I was the prize. Rowan told some filthy story about a girl from last summer that had me choking on my drink because of how detailed he got about her moaning his name while he fucked her from behind. Ryker topped it with one about sneaking into the locker room after practice and getting his dick sucked by two cheerleaders at once. “Swear to God,” Ryker said, eyes locked on mine. “One on her knees, the other licking my balls while I face-fucked the first.

God. Joining in. Fair. Becoming someone. Reasonable honestly. For the next hour Lily turned herself into a professional comedian. God. Everything became material. Fair. Faces. Voices. Reasonable. Falling over dramatically. God. Pretending to trip. Fair. Making animal sounds. Reasonable honestly. Peanut rewarded most of it with laughter. God. Tiny wonderful laughter. Fair. The house had never sounded happier. Reasonable. Then later, after the excitement settled, Lily sat beside her sister quietly.

He made me laugh, a genuine, bubbling sound that felt good after the fear. “Your turn,” he challenged, when he finished. “Tell me a joke. Something to keep the darkness at bay.” I thought for a moment. “Okay, okay… What do you call a fake noodle?” He raised an eyebrow, a slight smile playing on his lips. “What?” “An impasta!” I delivered the punchline with a flourish, and he actually laughed, a deep, booming sound that warmed the room. “Alright, alright, that was a good one, for a rookie,” he teased. “My turn. Why did the scarecrow win an award?”

The old woman shivered and held her paper bag close to her chest. “Can’t you hear me? "Keith exploded. “Please let me go. I have very less money and I’m a needy person. I have purchased my bread for tomorrow morning. Please have piety on me!” The old woman cried with teary eyes. “This is the last time I'm warning you to hurry up” Keith moved the knife closer to her face. The old woman took out her valet but kept it in her hand. “Please” The old woman begged. The tension between them increased and Keith pushed the old lady down the road and snatched her valet. He ran away as fast as he could and didn’t turn around.

Hugging her, he coaxed, "Alright, I'll stop teasing you. I'll tell you a real joke. One day, an elephant stepped on an ant hill. "The ants were furious and swarmed out of their home, planning to kill the elephant. They crawled toward the elephant's leg, but the elephant shook its leg, and the ants all fell to the ground. "Only one ant successfully climbed up to the elephant's neck. The other ants cheered. They shouted at the ant, 'Great work! You're the best! Strangle it! Strangle it! Strangle it!' "Encouraged by their high spirits, the ant thought that it could strangle the elephant for real. But after searching around the elephant's neck, it turned back to look at its tiny friends on the g

“Let me guess. The time I fell out of a tree trying to rescue a cat?” “And get stuck yourself,” he finished, his grin widening. “Yep, that one made the highlight.” “Unbelievable,” I muttered. “Anything else?” “Oh, plenty,” he said, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “Like the time you tried to ride a bike down a flight of stairs because, and I quote, ‘It’ll totally work.” I groaned louder, hiding my face in my hands. “Why does he share the most humiliating stories?” “Because they’re funny,” he said, his tone light but teasing. “And, if I’m being honest, kind of impressive. I mean, you survived riding a bike down stairs. That’s bold.”