Stupidly Funny Quotes Novels & Stories

Harmonica Saint is terrified of being unable to make friends. Coupled with her crippling social anxiety, and her fear of moving away from her family to a new place for college, she is afraid she'd have no friends. But surprisingly on the first day, someone wants to be her friend…. It is just that this person is Rhett Lockhart, littered with tattoos and mysterious beyond compare, Harmony has a bad feeling about this friendship. After all, friends don't give other friends hickeys on their necks. Or do they? "So you thought our friendship was over because of that? Funny baby girl, what makes you think I'll let you go….. Just like that?" He said the words so gently as he always spoke, but it was his eyes that gave him away, those pitch-black eyes were raging with all kinds of intense emotion, each promising to swallow her whole.

"It was a mistake! I apologized already," feeling so terrified as I moved backward."You should have known me better than this, little sparrow," He chuckled deeply, his gaze fixed on me."Lucas please!" I cried, now stopped by the wall as my heart beats faintly."Don't worry it's just a little game, you and I will play, you'll love it, little sparrow," He smirked.I knew this was a trick, Ben lied when he said he wouldn't hurt me and I stupidly fell into the trap.Now, I was alone with him and in his room.I think this is the time for me to announce my funeral..."Strip!" His cold voice snapped me out,as he stared at me with a deadpan expression while I gazed at him in ultra shock.******************Camilla Evans is a gentle nerd in her finals at Watermark Highschool. As a nerd, the stereotypical notion of her wearing thick rimmed glasses, out-of-vogue clothes and shoes which were eighty percent of the time, twice her size still stands. Having been at the bottom of the food chain in Watermark Highschool, Camilla was liable to predators and the most annoying one of them all went by the name, Lucas Liam.Camilla had no idea why the hottest guy in school would even spare her a glance not to mention actually spending the whole day bullying and teasing her to no end.Could there be something else to these false acts of bully and teases from Lucas?Find out what happens when the Cheerleader, Jenny Layton put Camilla's life at stake?Will she be able to handle all the torments she's passing through especially when her mum died and her sister left her behind?CONTAINS EXPLICIT CHAPTERS!!!

“Darlene Roberts, you're under arrest for the death of George Martins.”I look up with misty eyes only to see a bunch of cops, guns blazing and aimed at me. Funny enough, I don't even freeze neither do I panic. My attention goes back to my ex lover whose limp body is still warm with blood oozing from his forehead and chest. His shirt is torn and his big eyes are staring blankly at me. I've managed to help shut his mouth which was agape and his twisted lips. It seems he had put up one hell of a struggle before he gave up the ghost.“You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be used against you in the court of law.Does the cop mean what he has just said? I mean, I'm not the murderer here. I rushed here to help as soon as I could!

"I wouldn't be with a monster like you even if the world was ending and you were the last of the male specie!" That is what she said to him but life took a funny turn from there. Luka Vladimir is your typical Alpha, leading the most ruthless and largest pack ever known. He is 35 and still hasn't found his mate. He was getting restless in finding his luna but when he finally finds her, he wishes he hadn't! Venus Gracia is the exact opposite of anything a Luna should be known as. No, she isn't weak, unwanted and the trash of the town. She is haughty, conceited, and a full-blown feminist human! Born out of old money her only ambiance was to seize the reins of her father's company and she would stop at nothing in this misogynist world to prove her worth. Together they could ruin empires or could lead them to novel peaks but one thing was for sure, together they were explosive!

Night Stalker Series 3: Forrest Wood is an enigmatic tattooed bartender who lives in two worlds to protect someone he loves. He never questions his self-control over temptations while searching for answers for half his life. Until something has changed in a woman, he’s been keeping tabs for a while. When he’s finally ready to deal with his feelings, he knows nothing can be easy in his life—it only complicates his plans and his secrets that Megan might not accept who truly he is. A flirty, blunt, and funny, Megan Simons built her walls over relationships until her life crumbles down in front of her. Forrest comes to the rescue. She finds him intriguing and beyond attractive. When she starts bringing her walls down, she finds herself in a situation where Forrest Wood is more than what meets the eye.

My name is Ella Grace Johnson. I'm just an ordinary girl, living an ordinary life of an artist, until cancer forces me into an extraordinary situation. Desperate for medical treatment, I find myself in a fake marriage with Adrian Charles Montgomery, a billionaire CEO with a hidden struggle - sex addiction. It's supposed to be a simple arrangement, a means to an end. But life has a funny way of complicating things. Adrian is nothing like I expected. Behind his CEO persona, he's caring, considerate, and surprisingly understanding. But his addiction brings a new set of challenges to our relationship. As we go through this deception, I find myself drawn to him. But our secret is exposed, and I'm sent away, leaving my heart with Adrian. Now, I'm not just fighting for my life, but also for a love that was never supposed to happen. Can we turn our fake marriage into a real one? Or will our love story end before it even begins?

Cesari Islan Sandoval is a drop dead gorgeous multi billionaire playboy who can get any lady he wants at the snap of his fingers but doesn't do relationships until he meets Elyon Devane a single mom who is in need of a job. He feels drawn to her which is something that has never happened to him before so without thinking he gives her the job as his personal assistant thinking he could seduce her into sleeping with him but she turns out to be a hard nut to crack. He falls in love with her five years old daughter and though he doesn't consider himself a daddy material,he finds himself wishing he is her daughter's father. Funny enough he finds out that he is indeed her daughter's father which causes him to have a rethink much to the chagrin of his lover Antoinette Montalvo.

I should’ve known better than to fall for Drake Peterson— my boss, my secret, my addiction, and the only man who could ruin me with a whisper. For two forbidden years, I lived a life no one knew about. By day, I was his perfect secretary. By night, I was the woman he kept hidden in his arms, tangled in his sheets, and locked behind a contract that said I would never expect more. I lied. To him. To myself. To the shattered girl staring back at me every morning. Because I did fall for him—hopelessly, stupidly, completely. And then he destroyed me. With one cold conversation, he terminated our arrangement, handed me a monstrous payout, and told me to walk away like I meant nothing. No explanation. No softness. Just an order: “This is the end, Sabrina.” So I erased him. Deleted my social media. Vanished from New York. And used the money he gave me to build something new— Mendoza Luxe, the jewelry empire that turned me into the woman he never thought I could become. I told myself I was over him. Until the day I ran into an old coworker… and learned the truth I was never meant to hear: Drake is bankrupt. He never married his fiancée. And everything he threw away—including me— he did to protect my life. Now the man who once owned every breath I took is falling from the top… and fate is dragging us back into the same fire that burned us alive. Old desire doesn’t fade. Old wounds don’t heal. Old enemies don’t forget. I survived Drake Peterson once. The question is— can we survive the truth that tore us apart?

Emilia Burke is a young and advanced college student with an eye for trouble. Ever since her last year in high school, when the only man she ever loved disappeared without a single glance, she has been an expert at evading heartbreak. And hasn't formed a meaningful connection since. Sure, she's young, funny, pretty, and too smart, but she has kept her love interests at a distance and kept everything simple. Fun. No feelings attached. But now, with as much ease as when he disappeared, Leon Maverick has returned to her life as a successful and sexy business tycoon. He's determined to win back the girl whom once had given her all for him, but there's a problem when she can't even stand the idea of him. If only she would give, but there's just something... Something about Leon. And maybe, he'll break through her barriers one last time.

By day, Carlotta spins stories. By night, she serves drinks. Her life was simple. Until her good-for-nothing brother offered her as collateral to pay off a massive gambling debt to a ruthless underground casino. Now she's the reluctant fiancée of a powerful mafioso rumored to have a cruel streak... and a bedroom secret that's the talk of the criminal underworld: erectile dysfunction. Carlotta would've found it funny if it weren't her life on the line. To make things worse, fate throws in another complication: her dangerously attractive new driver-slash-bodyguard. With abs worthy of a thirst trap and a face that screams "Asgardian demigod". He's the kind of temptation a woman in her situation absolutely does not need. Just when she thinks it couldn't get more absurd, her cold, mysterious fiancé summons her to his penthouse suite with one chilling demand: He wants a taste of what's been promised. Her.