Novel & Cerita This House Don't Feel Like Home Lyrics

“You have a lovely house.” “Yes, mother and father love this interior and design.” I nodded not really listening to him. “I...” He let out a deep sigh. "I feel like I don't belong in here. I have this feeling that there is more to we know.” He looked at me. “You must think what a weirdo I am.”

for real. I brought the photo frame in my chest and hugged it. I can also feel the warm liquid streaming down on my face as I embrace the sorrowful moment. It doesn't feel like hugging you though. It felt hard and cold, not warm and soft. I don't like it at all. Inside these pages, you just hold me And I won't ever let you go Wait for me to come home Wait for me to come home Wait for me to come home Wait for me to come home

“Home?” I repeated in question. Home. I lived from one orphanage to another. I didn’t really have a permanent place to stay. I was alone but wasn’t lonely. I didn’t have a shelter of my own but I was home. For eighteen years, wherever I went, I was home. At first, I find it weird being comfortable with a new place at an instant, feeling home, but now I know why. It was because home was following me. Home doesn’t refer to a thing with doors and windows. Home is a person or even a ghost. Sadness slowly crept in my system. I just lost that home. Recently, I discovered that I got myself another home, Grip, but I lost them both right after another.

It had small cracks that I had ignored until the whole thing shattered. My throat tightened again, until another sob forced its way out of me. “I can't do this anymore. I just can't.” I whispered, though no one was there to hear me. The room felt suffocating to me. It was big but it was empty, it didn't feel like home to me. It had never felt like home to me, especially not with the distance between me and Jayden that felt wider than anything I could cross. It was right there in the same house with me but he felt like he had gone far away. Gone in a way that hurt me more than if he had actually left.

“Why does this feel like mine?” I shook my head slowly. This didn’t make sense. None of this made sense. I didn’t even know where it came from. But every time I held it… I felt something. Something deep. Something I couldn’t explain. I leaned back against the headboard and stared at the ceiling. “This house is full…” I said quietly. “…but why does it feel so empty?” No answer. Of course. There was never an answer. I closed my eyes again. And once again…

Just thinking of walking away steals my breath away and closes my lungs. And home? Where is that and what is that now? Is it a building of brick and mortar which holds my every memory since birth, or is it the place where my parents went? How can I go somewhere that doesn’t exist anymore? I’m alone now. There’s isn’t anyone there that I want to go home for. It’s just a word, an empty meaningless word without them there to warm its core.

I take a deep breath as we get ready to enter the pack house again. This is my home now so I will not let somebody make me feel not welcome in my own home. Even with the knowledge that they will be going home soon, it seems like the rest of the time that they are here is going to just drag.

Safety. But now I’m here... it doesn’t feel like home anymore. The house looks the same, but it feels different. Bigger. Quieter. Like I’m standing outside somewhere I used to belong, instead of somewhere that’s mine. 'You’re being ridiculous.' Zanthe huffs at me. 'I bet the training centre will feel like home.' She paces closer in my mind, her tail flicking. 'Home is a feeling anyway, not a place. You just haven’t found it again yet.'

But that sounds like horse shit to me. “I actually don’t feel good, Mum. I feel weird.” “Weird, how?” she asks. “I don’t know,” I continue. The car slows to a stop. I stare out the window to the place I call home. Calling it home feels wrong but I don’t know why. I don’t know a lot of things these days except the music. And on most days, the music doesn’t make me feel as whole as I try to make it seem. I open the door and put a foot out. “Something is off.”

I started to hum a song when I feel his chest heaved. "All of my life, I thought I was right. Looking for something new. Stuck in my ways like old-fashioned days but all the roads lead me to you. The house that you're living in, don't make it a home. But, feeling lonely doesn't mean you're alone." I saw him smiling and I beamed proudly as I continue to sing.