Yo Mama So Fat Jokes

I believed in fate and destiny—until love nearly killed me. Armin and I had been inseparable since we were sixteen. I waited, foolishly, to be chosen as his mate. But on his eighteenth birthday, I uncovered a betrayal so brutal, it almost cost me my life. The Moon Goddess had mercy. She gave me not one second chance… but two. The ravaged Twin Alphas of Warhaven—brutal, irresistible, bound by blood and war. Though they share the same face, one is a mad king, the other the sweetest soul I’ve ever known. But both were fated to me. Now, I’m trapped between the love I never saw coming and the revenge I can’t let go of. My heart is torn. My loyalty is tested. And every kiss drags me deeper into a storm I may never escape. They both crave my love. Armin deserves my wrath. And I? I want it all.

In the first two books, within a world where discovering a destined partner is nearly unattainable and rejecting them proves to be difficult, Olivia faces a dilemma when her husband abruptly encounters his fated match. Changing from a beloved and desired wife, she gradually fades into the darkness of his heart. The heartbreak is deep, yet she didn't let go due to the unbreakable ties that bind them. However, she realizes that genuine freedom alone can grant her peace. Thereafter, when an opportunity to escape her husband's pack arises through a selfless sacrifice, she grabbed it without hesitation. Olivia chooses not to look back, as fate may have stripped her of joy, home, and a happy ever after. Instead, she seizes control of her destiny and embarks on crafting her own fate alongside the Stormclaw Alpha.

“Mine,” I hear from behind me. Suddenly I am surrounded by the scent of chocolate and coffee. I slowly turn and my heart catches as I realize he is speaking to me. But will he want me when he learns the truth? Carrie is gifted to an Alpha in payment for a debt her father owes. She becomes his chosen mate and endures abuse, cheating and the loss of her wolf. She finally makes a run for it. Her goal is peace. Peace for herself. As she embarks on a deadly run for her life, with some friends she picks up along the way, she finds her fated mate. Will her baggage be too much for him? Will he leave her or help her in the fight for her life?

J'ai été choisie pour être la fiancée de Lorenzo, l'héritier de la Mafia. Mais lors d'un gala familial, Lorenzo a été ouvertement courtisé par Chiara, la fille d'un marchand d'armes. Chiara n'était pas comme les autres débutantes respectueuses des règles. Elle a filé à toute allure dans les rues au volant d'une voiture de sport modifiée, a utilisé un couteau de combat de qualité militaire pour couper ses cigares et a bu le whisky le plus âpre, pur. Il y avait en elle une sauvagerie indomptée, un feu dont Lorenzo n'a pas pu détourner le regard. Il s'est plaint auprès des anciens de la famille : « Comment une femme pareille pourrait-elle être notre Madre et diriger toute cette famille ? » Ses paroles ont dégouliné de mépris pour son imprudence, et pourtant ses yeux sont restés rivés sur elle, suivant chacun de ses gestes tandis qu'elle levait son verre. Puis, le jour de l'anniversaire de Lorenzo, il a annoncé son intention de faire de Chiara sa maîtresse. Chiara a refusé : « Les femmes de ma famille sont des épouses, jamais des maîtresses. Et le cœur de mon mari doit n'appartenir qu'à moi. » Lorenzo est venu me voir, la voix hésitante. « Alessia, ce n'est qu'un titre. J'ai besoin que tu le lui cèdes. S'il te plaît ? Elle ne comprend pas les traditions de notre famille et elle a fait tout un scandale à propos de m'épouser. Il faut simplement l'apaiser pour l'instant. Même si elle m'épouse, c'est toi qui continueras à gérer les affaires de la famille. » Alors que je me tenais là à essayer ma robe de mariée, une perle de cristal acérée sur le corsage m'a percé le doigt. Une seule goutte de sang s'est épanouie sur le satin d'un blanc immaculé. La robe a été ruinée, mais le mariage a eu lieu malgré tout. Si je ne pouvais pas être l'épouse de l'héritier, je suis devenue la femme du Don.

“You think I want this?” she hisses. “You think I asked for this bond? I hate you. I hate everything about you. You killed my husband. You took everything from me!” “Then kill me,” I growl, my voice barely more than a whisper. “If you hate me so much, kill me and end this.” She shakes her head, her eyes narrowing. “I’m not giving you the easy way out. Not until I know what rejecting this bond will do to me and my pack. Not until I know what we’re dealing with. Until then, I invoke The Gallows Law.” *** Luna Katya's world is shattered when her husband, Alpha Andrei, is killed by the ruthless Rogue Alpha Ruslan. Grieving and pregnant, Katya is ready to see the man responsible for her loss executed. But when Ruslan is brought before her, the mate bond snaps into place, throwing her life into chaos. Shocked and horrified, Katya calls for a stay of execution, invoking an old law known as The Gallows Law, which forbids the execution of a fated mate. Now, Katya must not only face the anger of her pack, who are disgusted by her sudden connection to the man they all hate, but a mate who hates her and who she hates in equal measure. Caught in a web of anger and attraction, Katya must decide whether to reject the bond and risk its unknown consequences, or keep the Rogue alive long enough to figure out what the Goddess has cursed her with. But the clock is ticking, and the pack won’t wait forever for justice.

When a ruthless Alpha is forced to take a wife or lose his crown, love is never part of the equation. With no fated mate and no time left, he chooses control—a contract marriage. A bride for rent. Five years. No affection. No freedom. For her, obedience has always been the cost of survival. Orphaned, abused, and betrayed by the man she trusted, marriage becomes just another prison, until she is dragged into a world she never knew existed. Wolves. Ancient laws. A powerful Alpha who sees her as temporary, disposable, and easy to forget. Until fate interferes. A single touch, a glowing mark and a bond that should not exist. She is his mate, and he rejects it. Convinced the Moon has made a cruel mistake, the Alpha refuses to accept a broken human woman with a painful past as his Luna. But the bond does not fade. It tightens. Grows stronger. Deadlier. Because the council is watching.Enemies are circling. And her forgotten past is awakening. Was she ever truly a bride for rent… or was she always destined to be his Luna? And when the Alpha is forced to choose between power and fate, will he claim her… or destroy them both?

“I’m going to make her mine,” Xander declared. “You are going to marry my wife, father?” “Your ex-wife,” Xander corrected. “She’s no longer your wife, Thayer. You just divorced her, remember?” he added, stepping closer to me on the bed. Thayer cheated on me the same day I found out I was pregnant for him. He divorced me cruelly and called me a mistake, fat, and dirty. However, in reaction to the betrayal, I found myself falling deeply in love with my father in-law and he in return fell for me too. His love ignited a forbidden passion in me and I was ready to sin with him. But my ex-husband suddenly realized what he had lost and wants me back. He is willing to go any lengths, even to kill to kill his own father just to win my heart again. But my heart now belongs to another-his father. My father in-law belongs to me, not to his ex-wife either!

Lucy Drew faced a turning point, as she prepared to accept her nature. But when her expected powers don’t appear on her twentieth birthday, everything she believed crumbles. Rejected by her mate, Prince Geoffrey, and betrayed by her best friend Laura, Lucy is forced into the wild, where surviving is her only choice. When her family seeks safety with the ruthless Bloodwood Pack, led by the mysterious and cursed Alpha, Karl Bloodwood, Lucy gets caught in a mix of secrets and risks. As her relationship with Karl grows stronger, so does the threat of an old curse that endangers his life and affects their new bond. Stories of previous partners who met a terrible end trouble Lucy as she struggles with her new power and the scary idea that her fate might be linked to a darkness she never expected. With dangerous enemies hiding in the dark and betrayal always just a moment away, Lucy faces a tough challenge. Can she find out what is going on in time to prevent history from repeating itself? Or will the love that is destined for her and her partner become a painful sacrifice to an ancient curse that demands blood? Join Lucy on this exciting journey filled with unexpected betrayals, inner strength, and a love that is not allowed. In this story, the difference between love and danger becomes less clear with every thrilling surprise that happens...

He is Prince Dymitri Lance Montague of the Kingdom of Nirvana, and she's his maid. They both fell in love with each other, but Serene clearly knew that their story was not a Cinderella-like love story with a happy ending. Hindi lamang ang estado nila sa buhay ang hadlang sa kanilang pag-iibigan kundi higit ang magulang ng binata na tutol sa kanilang relasyon. Ginawa ng mga ito ang lahat para paghiwalayin sila. Isang masakit na kasinungalingan na naging dahilan para labis siyang kamuhian ng binata. Na deport si Serene pabalik ng Pilipinas kasabay ng pagkakatuklas niya na siya'y nagdadalang-tao. Limang taon ang lumipas, habang naghihintay ng masasakyan si Serene kasama ang apat na taong gulang na anak mula sa pinapasukan nitong kindergarten, bigla itong tumawid sa kalsada ng hindi niya namamalayan. Muntik na itong masagasaan kung hindi lang mabilis ang driver ng SUV sa pagpreno. Ngunit hindi lang iyon ang nagpayanig sa buong pagkatao ni Serene, ikinagimbal niya rin ng labis ng masilayan niya ang mukha ng lalakeng bumaba mula sa backseat ng sasakyan. Si Dylan.. na noo'y biglang tumiim ang mga mata ng mapadako ang tingin sa kanyang anak.

"In a world of werewolves, Humans, witches and vampires, twin alphas Jayden and Kayden rule their respective packs, The Blumoon pack. Alpha Jayden is the alpha of the Blu pack and Alpha Kayden is the Alpha of Moon pack. Kayden is the eldest and Jayden is the youngest. But when Jayden discovers his human mate, Muna Carmichael, his world is turned upside down. Muna has vowed to avenge her parents' deaths, and she never expected her mate to be a werewolf, let alone an alpha. As Muna and Jayden are forced together by the bonds of the moon Goddess, they find themselves falling for each other. But with Muna's vow for revenge hanging over their heads, will they be able to find happiness together?" Will she find out the main truth regarding her parents death. will she find out her true identity? Why's Jayden's ex girlfriend coming back now that Jayden loves his mate? Will they be able to conquer and fight the unforseen people after Thier bond? Read To find out.