I find Mia waiting for me right where we had planned and sneaking up on her. I give her side a poke, making her jump.
“Freaking Faith!”, She reaches out to jab me, and I shy away from her.
“How’s your first day so far?” I ask her, leading her to the line.
“It’s fine, but I got stood up by the person they assigned to show me around.” I look at her, confused.
“Why didn’t you text me? I would have come and done it for you?”
“Nah, it’s fine. I told the lady in the office and she is sending someone to show me around in like 10 minutes.”
“Look at you taking initiative.” I toss an elbow to her as we get up to the food.
Mia grabs the quintessential burger and fries with white milk and I reach for the salad and a soda. I have a running club starting in a week, so working on getting my body ready is sorely needed. But mostly because the running club advisor is the lunch lady, and she is giving me some serious stink eye for even looking at the yummy burger that has my name on it. I smile at her sweetly, pretending I had planned on the salad the whole time. We find a seat tucked into a corner near a window and take a seat.
“So how is your day going?” Mia asked through a bite of luscious red meat. I really want that burger.
“It’s been interesting. Somehow I ended up in the wrong class and had to go to the office to figure it out and ran into the cliche hot rich couple and that was weird to say the -”
“I’m sorry, the wrong class?” Mia interrupts.
“Yeah, somehow I ended up being put in AP English without my consent.”
“Wait, so they enrolled you in AP English without telling you?” Mia says confused.
“Yeah! I felt so stupid. Everyone was staring at me. Interestingly enough, they showed me the confirmation email, which did not go to my email. It went to Annoymous352,” I said, annoyed.
“Oh wow, how very sneaky of them,” I nod, equally stunned as she. “And excuse me, why is it so bad for you to be seen, Faith? Would it kill you to not try to be invisible?”
“Mia, how dare you.” I feign hurt. And I lean in to whisper, “I’m on the shortlist to get accepted into the ACN University. I have to practice now if I want to pass the exams.” Mia stares at me, completely flabbergasted.
“Do I even-”
“Ask me!” She shakes her head no “ASK ME!” I say excitedly “you know you want to.”
“Ok fine. What the heck is ACN University?” I beam at her, smiling triumphantly.
“The Accelerated College of Nin-”
“If you say freaking Ninja’s I’m going to punch you.” She warns, cutting me off and taking a swig of her Milk.
“Ninjas.” I finish happily and put my hands up to defend myself. “I dare you to come at me. I’ve been training for years.” She takes another sip of milk while I make a karate chopping motion and high pitched 'Hi-yah' “I’m practically invisible, it was a colossal achievement for me”
Mia can’t help but laugh as she spews her milk and her attention turns to above my shoulder than her milk flies over my head, raining down on me and splashing none other than Cameron Davis.
“Oh, shit,” I whisper, staring at his perfect angular face dripping with white milk as he blinks, stunned.
I look at Mia, who is mortified, and I try to hold it in. I do my best not to laugh in awkward situations, but unprompted and unwanted giggles come, and they come on strong. My shoulders shake until loud gleeful noises flow from me. The whole of the cafeteria turns their attention to us in a deafening silence. After a moment I finally reign my laughing in and grab a napkin and reach out to wipe off the still stunned Cameron who is staring at me with red cheeks and insane fury.
“Hey! I didn’t do it,” I say in defense as he stares into my soul, threatening it.
“You laughed,” He says through clenched teeth. “People don’t laugh at me.”
“You look funny,” I say simply, shrugging, “plus it’s all over me too. Laughing is a defense mechanism.”
I attempt to keep a straight face. “I literally can’t help it.”
Cameron sets his tray down and sits next to my spot, and I stand staring down at him.
“What- no. you can’t sit here.” I rush out. “Get out of here,” I whisper to him as he looks up at me, stunned like a Prince who doesn’t understand why the peasant girl isn’t flattered by his presence.
“No, I’m doing community service.” I look at him, confused.
“The principal wants me to show the new girl around. Apparently, she’s a real Genius,” He grins at me. “I knew you were the new girl,” I look over at Mia, who is seemingly still shaken over the whole event.
“Right, well, I’m not new. The new girl is my cousin Mia.” I point to Mia, who smiles awkwardly and waves. “And I hate to do this to ya Mia, but I just remembered I have to be somewhere that’s not here.”
“Faith!” Mia calls out in a plea as I turn and runoff.
I pull out my phone to text her the world’s best apology for ditching her in a hurry. Mid-text, my arm is yanked hard and I turn to see Angela giving me the devil glare. I internally roll my eyes, cursing under my breath. Why me? Why now? I plaster on the fakest smile I can muster.
“Hey, Angela. What can I do for you?” I say in an almost convincing, friendly voice. She steps back disgusted when she sees my soggy milk appearance.
“Is-is that milk in your hair?”
“Yeppers. Even better, it’s partially regurgitated milk, it’s a great hair thickener,” I wince inwardly.
Where is all this sass suddenly coming from? Is this a senior thing? The whole ‘I don’t give a shit- I’m almost out of here?’ It would be terrible timing since it’s the very first day of school.
“Yeah, I just go to the salon for that stuff.” She says, her eyes slowly rolling over my messy state, mesmerized by my disheveled appearance.
“Did you need something, Angela?” I ask to pull her from her trance. And she clears her throat.
“uh…” She shakes her head. “Yes. I don’t know what you did to Cameron, but he thinks you are someone he needs to have. This is me nicely telling you to stay the hell away from him.”
“Two warnings in one day. Yikes.” I look at Angela’s face as it contorts into an angry cheerleader mode and I put my hands up in surrender.
“Look, like I said before, I want nothing to do with the guy.”
“We’ll see about that,” she says as she flips her hair around and walks away
“There’s nothing to see! Seriously! I don’t even like the guy.” I holler back at her. “What is with this day?” I whisper to myself as I walk to my next class.
Warm water trickles down my leg as another contraction squeezes my insides in an invisible vice grip. I groan loudly, clutching the counter and leaning over. I hear a clattering beside me and I look over, seeing Izzy holding his little stuffed puppy, his eyes wide in fear. He looks so much like Cameron right now. I smile through the pain as he tentatively steps closer. “Mommy, you peeped your pants on the floor?” he asks in his sweet 3-year-old voice and I chuckle. “No baby, mommy is going to have a baby. Do you know where mommy’s phone is?” I ask, hoping he might remember where I had it last since I never can recall these days where I put anything. “Um. Yep!” His tiny little legs work hard as he runs out of the bathroom and bangs around in the living room. “Iz. Izzy?” I call to him. “Yeah, mommy?” “Did you find it?” He walks into the bathroom, holding my phone, and I nearly fall over with rel
4 years later, *Cameron POV* I wipe my sweaty palms on my khaki pants. Faith’s name rings through the speaker system and a single graduation cap rises from the sea of green as she makes her way to the stage. Noah and I jump to our feet, screaming and cheering for her. It doesn’t matter to me that every man and woman graduating is wearing the same robes and hat. My Faith looks a thousand times better than all of them. Her auburn hair shimmers in the sunlight as she climbs the stairs, a stunning, excited smile on her perfect face. There is no doubt in my mind that this woman is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. She shakes the dean’s hand and pauses for a minute while photos are snapped. Noah and I take our seats and he leans over to me anxiously. “Ok, dude. I’m freaking out for you,” he whispers. I shoot him a scowl, and he just chuckles and shrugs. Noah and I quickly became good friends and then, as fate wou
*4 months later* * Faith POV* “Come on, Faith!” Cameron shouts “Run faster!” Mia screeches “Yeah, pretend Mia is coming for you!” Noah adds. I can hear an oof from him, which makes me smile, knowing Mia probably whacked him. I try to tune them out as I run by them on my last lap, hurtling towards the finish line. I need to hone in and focus. Currently, I’m sitting in second place with Mariah right on my heels. My heart is racing with the sheer adrenaline of the race and my legs are exhausted. They feel like jello but I push harder, faster than I have ever gone before. Little by little, I gain on the girl in front of me. Each step vibrates through my leg, pulling me closer to my last victory.
“Do you guys think it's stupid of me to keep doing family therapy?” I ask Mia, Noah, and Cameron. They all look around at each other, waiting for someone to talk. “That’s up to you,” Mia says. “If you think you need to do it to get the closure you need, then I think it’s exactly what you need,” “You have to remember that you are un-hashing a lot of heavy stuff. You are reopening old wounds so that you can heal appropriately. It’s going to be tough in the beginning.” Noah adds. “You said Uncle John is back to actually showing up, right?” Mia asks, and I nod. I forgot how long it’s been since we’ve sat and had a serious conversation about it all since she spends most of her time with Noah and I’ve been busy with Cameron. “Did he give a good excuse?” Cameron asks. “He went back to visit his AA mentor and talk about everything. His mentor helped him find a therapist here and Dad claims he is going daily now.” I say, sh
*Faith POV* The car idles as I sit and stare at the garage door. A stray tear slowly weaves its way down my cheek as I swipe at it furiously. I hate feeling like this. My therapist keeps telling me that healing is a process and even when I ‘heal’ I’ll still have moments when I’m not ok. And today I’m not ok. I feel emotionally drained, and all I want to do is sleep for days. I hate these scars that make me feel so ugly and imperfect. I have done so well compartmentalizing all my shit so I could help and be there for Cameron. And it felt amazing to do that. I regret nothing. But now I’m being bowled over by my own insecurities and internal pain and I feel so alone. I have people I can call who would be here in a moment for me. But I feel terrible for bothering them with my sob stories. Mia called me the moment I left Cameron his food to ask if we could reschedule our girls-only night. Of course, I said yes. She is in love and happy
The arcade is bustling and the sounds of the games surrounding me remind me just how alive and vibrant this place is. I sit at one of the tables towards the back with a now cold pepperoni pizza as I watch everyone move around me. A young girl is crying because she lost the game while her older brother chuckles and tries to console her. The boy to the left sits at the table drinking his soda while being engrossed in some random comic strip in his hand. I look to the center of the store and I swear I can see her. Standing there in front of a young boy who looks just like me. I blink back the burn of tears, letting the memory play itself out before me as if it’s a movie of my life. “Oh, my sweet little Izzy. I promise the machines are clean,” she assures me with a sweet smile. & year old me just smiles in excitement. “Shouldn’t I be at school?” ten-year-old me asked her. “Not today. Today we are celebrating yo