Chapter 15: “Certainty”

Amber’s POV

I stayed awake all night staring at the ceiling in my room. Sleep wasn’t forthcoming as I relayed the day’s events over and over again.

I couldn’t help but think about him and the way he said those words “You’re mine.” Something about it sent a tingling sensation down my spine.

The words kept replaying in my head like a song I didn’t want to remember but couldn’t forget either.

I turned on the bed, pulling the duvet tighter around me.

This was getting out of hand, It was just a contract.

A one-year agreement and nothing more so why did it feel like something was shifting?

I exhaled and sat up. Maybe I needed water or something to distract me from the excessive thinking.

The house was quiet as I stepped out, what did I expect? He’s probably asleep, it’s so late on the night.

But just as I got to the kitchen, I saw him.

He was leaning against the counter, sleeves rolled up and a glass of water in his hand. He looked like he had been there for a while and his ruffled hair looked like he couldn’t sleep either.

“You’re awake,” he said.

“I could say the same about you,” I replied.

He took a sip of water, his gaze still on me.

“I don’t sleep much.”

“I noticed.”

I moved to grab a glass, trying to act normal.

Trying to act like my heart wasn’t beating faster than it should.

“Still thinking?” he asked suddenly.

“Yea, the day was quite eventful.

“It sure was.”

I heard him take a deep breath and I guessed he was about to say something heavy.

“Amber, what do you think about me?”

I turned to face him. That was absurd, why did he need to know what I thought of him.

“You really want to know?”

“Yes, no filters”

“Well, I think you are a very nice person who loves and wants to be loved but has to act like a selfish and narcissistic jerk so you don’t get looked down on. And yes, you’re very annoying.”

“No offense.” I added

That earned a slight lift of his brow.

“None taken. You sure do have a lot of things to say but that’s fine.”

He pushed himself off the counter, and started walking

towards me. With each strides, he was getting closer and closer to me.

“About what I said in the car”

My breath hitched.

“And what exactly did you mean?” I asked, my voice softer now.

He stopped right in front of me and this time we were only inches apart.

“I meant what I said.”

“That doesn’t explain anything,” I whispered.

He maintained the gaze and then briefly glanced at my lips.

“It doesn’t…..”

Before I could respond, his lips crashed against mine.

Not even the first time we met or the public kiss could compare to this. It was splendid, it wasn’t searching or domineering but rather passionate.

He kissed me hungrily like he had been holding back for too long.

My breath hitched, but I didn’t pull away. Instead, I leaned into him.

My hands found his shirt, gripping slightly as I kissed him back.

It was clear we both have been waiting to do this for a long time. Even if we went back to strangers again, I just wanted to live in the moment.

When we finally pulled apart, the air between us felt heavier. We were both breathless and I couldn’t help but notice his gaze on me, it looked like something else.

“Does this explain something to you now Amber?” He asked.

“Use your words Adrian. I don’t want to keep guessing.”

He exhaled, running a hand through his hair, I could see he was frustrated.

“I don’t know what this is,” he admitted.

“And I don’t know how to handle it.”

His eyes met mine again.

“But I know I don’t like the idea of you not being around.”

I looked at him and for the first time, Adrian looked flustered.

“If you don’t know exactly how you feel, how then can I trust your feelings for me Adrian? Come back to me when you are sure of what you feel.”

With that, I walked out and went to my room. Immediately I got there, I slammed the door and sat down on my bed. I started reminiscing about the kiss and all that he said. I felt happy about the kiss but I don’t want to be someone who was uncertain about his feelings.

Sighing for the umpteenth time, I wondered if rejecting him that way was the best thing to do. Still wallowing in thoughts, I slept off.

Adrian’s POV

I heard her door close and the sound of it lingered.

“Come back to me when you’re sure.”

Her words stayed in the air long after she was gone, like they had weight to them. They meant more than she even realized.

I stood there, for a second I almost went after her.

But my feet didn’t move. Because she was right and that was the problem, I wasn’t sure.

I exhaled slowly, dragging a hand through my hair as I turned away from the kitchen.

What the hell was that? I kissed her.

And this time, it was different. Not out of anger or to prove a point, this time, I wanted it.

I let out a quiet scoff as I walked down the hallway

“This is ridiculous.”

It was supposed to be simple. A one year contract, nothing more.

So how did I go from that to standing in my kitchen, completely thrown off because a woman asked me to define my feelings?

That was it. I didn’t do feelings, not like this.

Everything in my life has always been calculated.

But this? This was messy and unpredictable.

“How can I trust your feelings if you don’t understand them?”

She wasn’t wrong, she wanted certainty. Something solid and all I had given her was confusion.

I clenched my fist slightly, why did that bother me?

Why did it matter that she walked away instead of staying?

I had pushed people away before and easily at that.

So why did it feel different now?

Why did it feel like I had just lost something without even knowing what it was?

Halfway through the hallway, I stopped. My gaze shifted toward her door.

It was closed, what was she doing ? Was she thinking about the kiss like me or was she sleeping?

I almost knocked on her door but decided against it, I guess I should give her space, she needs it.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, pulling me out of my thoughts. I pulled it out, already irritated.

It was an unknown number and I almost ignored it but something made me open it.

It was a message.

“You really think you’ve won?” My expression hardened instantly.

Another message came in before I could process the first.

“Let’s see how long she stays yours.”

I stared at the screen for a second longer before locking it.

Whatever confusion I had, whatever internal battle I was dealing with, it didn't matter right now.

Because someone out there thought they could interfere with her.

They clearly didn’t know who they were dealing with and that was going to be their biggest mistake.