Chapter 2

Vera

And just like that, Cleo was quiet. She wasn’t gone far from it. She retreated to the farthest parts of my mind. I knew she was just there, but she gave me that false sense of privacy. I could feel her pouting, but she didn’t push it on me. She used to insist on me needing her as much as she needed me, but recently, because of what happened she has given that to me. She never liked him, but accepted that he was who I chose. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t our mate, she stepped back for me.

Now that I’m single again, she has been itching to go out and meet people. Finding your mate isn’t something that is likely to happen. There are thousands, hundreds of thousands of wolves in the world. Not everyone is lucky enough to cross paths with their mate and I’m not one of those people who believe that’s even possible. I don’t want to find someone to be by my side forever. I don’t know what I want, but I know for sure that I do not want that. Cleo is interested in Dane because he’s a ranked member. Something about male wolves who have a firm place in the pack calls to her and who doesn’t like a man in uniform?

Now that I’m done working on the sitting room, I head toward the kitchen. When I push the double doors open, I’m not even surprised when I see a disaster waiting for me. Food all over the floor, counters covered in unfinished plates, and dishes piled high. The clock on the walls says that I have less than an hour to get everything done and ready. I take a deep breath, walk in, and get started.

The truth is I have tried to see other people. I just bail out at the last minute, but I did have my first in-person meet with someone last Saturday. I haven’t told Ami because I wanted to see how it went first. Knowing her, she would want details of every position and she’d want me to check in. I had no plans of sleeping with anyone. I wanted to see what it would be like to spend time with another man. Baby steps.

Out of the three guys I was talking to, I thought James would be the safest option. As if there was anything safe about meeting up with strangers. It only got worse when you went back to their place or Goddess forbid somewhere dark and secluded. But the things a girl will do for some dick. I shuddered. Me. I was that girl now. Despite every survival instinct telling me not to meet up with men I didn’t know personally, I did it anyway.

I met James at the movie theater. He as a Warrior, he didn’t have rank, and he was from one of the surrounding packs. He was proud of where he came from and liked what he did. He didn’t want more or less. He was working a job nearby for a short assignment. He wasn’t expecting to be here long.

My hands were sweaty and icy as I walked through the theater doors. I saw him instantly. He stood out like a sore thumb. He was glorious, really. Tall, blonde, blue eyes with broad dependable shoulders.

When he turned and saw me, I couldn’t help from lowering my chin and staring at the ground. I hated this, my body froze up, and I couldn’t take another step forward. It wasn’t something I should do: I wasn’t taught to do this as the Luna’s daughter. My mother was one of the first females to run a pack. I should be headstrong and confident, but I wasn’t. That wasn’t who I was anymore.

This was learned behavior from him.

James swept me up in a big hug. I went from talking to him every day for the last few weeks to being mute. When I lifted my chin and met his gaze, he was all smiles. I couldn’t help but feel comfortable. His eyes swept down my body and compliments dripped from his tongue. It should have made me feel good, but it only made it awkward. I wasn’t used to them and I sure as hell wasn’t used to all of the attention.

James was sweet. He bought me popcorn, soda, and one of each chocolate candy because he remembered that I loved chocolate. He made jokes until we got into the movie and held my hand while we watched. It was weird, but good. When we ran out of popcorn he ran out and got a refill. I couldn’t even remember the last time I had been on a date.

After the movie, I expected him to pressure me to go back to his truck, but he didn’t. He told me he had a great time and asked if I wanted to grab dinner. I had so much junk that I couldn’t image putting any more food into my mouth. I told him thank you but passed.

He said he had fun and didn’t want to leave. He was flying across country to another assignment tomorrow and didn’t know when he would have the chance to come back. Everything about him was good, everything about it was nice, but still I hesitated. I hadn’t removed the barrier between us.

A part of me couldn’t believe he was a nice guy, even though everything about him checked out. I think that’s what it was. He was too nice. I wouldn’t be able to find fault in him and if I kept seeing him what else would there be? He was relationship material, and I wasn’t.

I wasn’t ready for that.

I couldn’t foresee a future where I would be ready for that. I told him goodnight and called it a success. I didn’t get chopped up into a million pieces and stuffed into a box. I did the thing and that was a step in the right direction.