Chapter 25 - His Shame.

-Alaric-

Flashback

“Weakness,” My father’s voice boomed across the room. He stared straight into my eyes, and once again, I was reminded of who I took after. The colour of my eyes was the only thing I had inherited from him. “Has no place in leadership, Alaric.”

His voice was cold and firm, sending a familiar chill down my spine.

“Yes, Father.” I nodded, averting my gaze from his, because his stern gaze reminded me how weak I was.

He let out a deep, disappointed sigh. “Yes? Yes?! You are weak, Alaric!”

My body trembled as I watched my father rise from his throne. Even my wolf whimpered in fear. The moment his sandals came into view, I took a few steps backwards.

And that was my mistake.

Almost immediately, his palm collided with my cheek, the sharp sting followed by another slap against the other.

“You cannot be weak, not on my watch!”

*

I fell to my knees before my furious father.

“You hesitated!” he roared.

My throat tightened. “I have sinned, Father, and I deserve to be punished.” I forced the words out, keeping my head bowed.

“Good.” I could hear the satisfaction in his voice. “And how will that be?”

I slowly raised my head, held his gaze for a moment, then turned my eyes towards the instrument of correction hanging on the wall.

“By the bladed canes.”

He said nothing. He simply turned, retrieved one of the canes, which was more like a bladed rope and strode towards me.

I dare not close my eyes. I kept them open as he raised the cane.

Then it came down.

I flinched at the impact, gritting my teeth as I fought to suppress the groan threatening to escape me. The blades dug into my skin, their sharp edges biting deep.

No shouts.

No screams.

Those were the rules during my correction.

I braced myself, knowing that the pain of the cane would be nothing compared to what came next. The blades would hurt even more when he pulled them out of my flesh.

My thoughts were cut short as my father yanked the cane away.

I couldn't hold back my scream as the blades tore through my skin.

“Ahhhh!”

Present*

I stirred awake.

Strange. Because…

I never stirred awake.

I couldn't remember the last time I had woken up feeling so calm, so peaceful.

Usually, I woke up with a start, a jerk, a shout, or, worse, a scream. But this time, I didn't even want to open my eyes. I wanted to sleep a little longer.

And now, I wasn't trying to no end, to drag myself out of my darkness, my void…

No pounding against my chest, my head wasn't banging nor was there that quickness to check how much damage I have done to my body.

None of that. I was comfortable.

The first thing I noticed was that I was still lying on my large, soft bed.

Was I dreaming?

It had been years since I last woke up in my bed without remembering how I had ended up somewhere else. Sometimes, I wake up sitting on the floor. Other times, I found myself at the edge of the bed or sprawled across the ground, covered in my blood.

Yet here I was, still lying on my bed, my eyes closed, my breathing even, I was at peace.

I wanted this to last longer.

I snuggled closer to the warmth beside me, inhaling the scent beneath my nose. Once. Twice. Again.

This wasn't the smell of herbs.

It was something else. Something soothing, something that seemed to reach into the deepest corners of my mind and quieten the chaos there.

I feel my lips pulled into a smile.

I took another breath of this calming fragrance of lavender and hibiscus.

My thoughts came to an abrupt halt.

My eyes snapped open.

Lavender and hibiscus?

My gaze fell upon a sight I would have staked my life on never witnessing.

I, Alaric, was wrapped in the arms of a certain veiled girl.

Ah. No. I was the one that had wrapped myself in her arms.

My hands were around her, my legs tangled with hers, and my face was practically buried against her neck.

For a moment, I couldn't move.

Then–

“Your Majesty,” she said quietly.

I jerked backwards with a start, rolled straight off the bed, and hit the floor with a painful thud.

“Argh!” I winched.

What in the moon's name—

Before I could gather my thoughts, Aurelia rushed out of bed and knelt beside me. She helped me, I sat at the edge of my bed.

Her movements were so carefully, feather light, I almost did not feel them.

“Are you all right?” She asked in that calm voice of hers that leaves me wanting more of it. “I'm sorry. That must have startled you.”

She bowed her apology, then she reached for the cloth still soaked in herbs.

“I noticed your breathing becoming more active, so I suspected you had woken up.”

“I... I...”

My brain cells weren't cooperating.

What was I supposed to say?

I had just slept with Aurelia in my arms. Worse, I had woken up peacefully, in my bed, without the usual occurrences

And my body?

I glanced down at myself. My gaze, to my surprise, was met with lighter and fewer scratches than usual.

I…I… I didn't hurt myself that much.

This felt so strange, so unreal…. So good. I feel a warm feeling spread in me, this was the best feeling, I want to feel this again, I want-

My breath caught.

Wait.

Did that mean...? My earlier relief crashed within me.

I snapped my head up, my face tightening into a frown.

“Did I hurt you?” I looked her over but certainly I wouldn't know because she was veiled from her head to her feet, I could only see half of her forehead to the ridge of her nose.

My hands itched to reach for her, to check her for injuries, to make sure I hadn't done something unforgivable while unconscious.

But I stopped myself.

She was a veiled woman. I had no right to touch her carelessly without her permission… well which I am already guilty of because I must have forcefully dragged her to my bed.

Disgust flushed within me. I felt more disgusted and shameful because she must have seen me in that state.

‘She must have seen me hurting yourself.’

‘I must have frightened her.’

‘She must have seen the monster I am.’

These thoughts raged in my head, each cutting deeper than the last.

The thought came to a halt as a damp cloth entered my field of vision. Aurelia gently pressed it against the scratches on my neck.

My body stiffened.

I stared at her hand and at the cloth resting against my skin, and something inside me recoiled in displeasure, in shame.

I swallowed down the bitter tightness behind my throat. I grabbed her wrist and pushed her hand away.