I feel something break inside me. How does loving Finn make me miserable?
“Let me go, Knox,” I say, my voice trembling. “You might not be a good brother, but I’m a good friend. I’m not going to sit around and watch my friend be deceived again. I’m going out there.” Knox doesn’t budge. His grip on my waist remains firm, his body immovable. In a voice so calm it only fuels my rage, he says, “I can’t let you go out there, Kitten. I will physically restrain you if I have to.” “Who the hell do you think you are?” I snap. “You don’t get to control me, Knox. Let. Me. Go.” “I’m not controlling you. I’m preventing you from making a fool of yourself—again.” If my hands were free, I probably would have slapped him by now. “I’m beginning to see why Finn almost never mentioned you in the ten years I’ve known him. You're such an arrogant, infuriating douchebag who cares about nothing else but himself. You'd rather watch your own brother get his heart ripped out than actually do something about it.” Knox’s eyes darken, and for a moment, I swear I see something wicked flash through them. “That’s the thing, Sloane. Finn likes getting his heart ripped out by Delilah. He likes her toxicity. He's addicted to it. The only person seeing a problem between those two being together is you. Stop projecting your feelings onto Finn.” “You can't tell me what to do or feel, you brother hater.” Knox grins. “Think whatever you like. But I want what makes Finn happy. Unfortunately for you, that’s Delilah. Always has been. Always will be.” “You’re disgusting.” “What exactly can you do about it, Sloane? Wanna lock him in a maximum-security prison somewhere offshore? Chain him up in your basement? Finn will always go back to Delilah. You think you’re the first person obsessed with ending their silly little love story? Let. It. Go.” “I can’t.” The words slip out before I can stop them. My chest is heaving, my face burning, and I’m standing there like an idiot with my heart bleeding all over the floor for a man who’s out there chasing someone else. Knox tilts his head, studying me with the eyes of a predator who’s just found the weakest part of his prey. “How about we make a bet?” he says. I narrow my eyes. “A bet?” "If this wedding takes place between Delilah and Hunter, I'll let you be so you can chase Finn to the ends of the Earth if you feel like it. Follow him around like a devoted puppy. I won't lift a finger to stop you." "And if it doesn’t?" A slow, dangerous grin spreads across his face. "If the wedding goes to shit—which it will—I will violently pursue you, Sloane Mercer. There's no place in this world you can hide from me that I won't find you. I will crawl inside your head, your body, your soul. I will ruin you for anyone else. You won’t be able to think, breathe, or sleep without feeling me everywhere. I’ll make you forget Finn Hartley ever existed. The things I could do to you. The things I want to do to you…” For some weird reason, I can't breathe anymore. I turn away from Knox, facing the window again, wondering why my body has gone live with electricity. It's hatred, I tell myself. Pure, undiluted hatred making my body react this way—not desire, never desire. Yet somehow I'm hyperaware of every inch of space between us, as though there's no clothing barrier separating his skin from mine. I try to pull away, but he holds me close, his lips brushing against my ear. The contact sends a jolt through my system. “All you need is something else to obsess over,” he says. “Something to channel all that obsessive energy of yours toward. Let me provide that for you. Let me give you a hobby, Kitten, a very pleasurable one.” I want him to do it. Good lord. What is wrong with me? This is Finn’s brother. I can't be in love with one man and then become a hot mess around his brother. Yet my body is betraying me, responding to him in ways I've never responded to anyone. "You can't do this,” I say, not recognizing my own voice. “You’re my best friend's brother. There's a code of conduct about these things." "A code? Screw your codes," he says. "I see what I want, I take it. Unlike you, pining away in silence, letting your life pass by. That is something I’m going to teach you, Sloane Mercer, how to bend the universe's will and take what you want." My breath hitches. "I don't need your lessons. Thank you very much.” He touches my hips, pulling me further into him, and I don't think I have a single bone left in my body to resist. "I always get what I want,” he says, his voice a dark promise. “And since what I want at the moment is you, you better hope that wedding takes place. There's nothing I want more than to tie you up and bury myself so deep inside you that you’d blackout.” I swear my legs are about to give out. My skin is burning, my pulse hammering in my throat. I've never felt this kind of animal attraction before—this raw, primal need that overpowers reason, morality, loyalty. It's nothing like the sweet ache I feel for Finn. This is something darker, more dangerous, and infinitely more terrifying. "Get away from me," I whisper. "Take the deal, Sloane." I'm trembling. My brain is screaming run, but my body is leaning into him like a traitorous little bitch. In this moment, I hate myself more than I hate him, because despite everything—despite my feelings for Finn—part of me wants to see what would happen if I surrendered. I swallow hard, desperate to put distance between us, to regain some semblance of control. "Fine,” I say, turning to meet his eyes. “We have a deal. Wedding happens, I never hear from you again. If it doesn't... give it your best shot." Knox's grin is pure sin. "Oh, Kitten. You have no idea what you've just done." I’m pretty sure I’ve just signed my soul over to the devil in exchange for nothing. “You know what this means, right,” he says. “I have a wedding to sabotage.” “What? No. No. No. You said you were not going to sabotage the wedding.” “That was before you took my deal. You think you can win by playing fair?” “You're not sabotaging this wedding, Knox.” “Wanna bet?” “I'm done with you and your stupid bets. If you so much as breathe the wrong way throughout this event, I’m taking you down.” He laughs. “Oh, it's on, Kitten. Let the strongest man win.” Before I can reply, the front door bursts open, and Finn walks in, looking like he's been through hell. His hair is disheveled, his eyes red-rimmed, his shoulders slumped in defeat. The sight of him—broken, vulnerable, so clearly hurting—snaps me back to reality, reminding me why I'm here, what matters. We both turn toward him, and the way Finn's eyes move between Knox and me—noting our proximity—makes my stomach drop. Oh God. "What are you two doing?" Finn asks, suspicion dripping from every word. I step away from Knox like I've been burned. "Nothing." Finn narrows his eyes. "Were you two... oh my God. Were you two making out?"Sloane’s legs tremble. Her hands claw at my back. Her mouth falls open as her body locks up, and then she shatters. She clamps down so hard and so deep that I have to grit my teeth just to keep from losing it right then. The grip of her, the way she’s pulling me in like she never wants to let go—it’s damn near impossible to hold back.And then, in the middle of it all, she breaks me. “I want your baby, Knox,” she says. “Fill me up.”That’s it. That’s the end of my control.“Jesus,” I growl, and everything unravels. I start slamming into her, hard, fast, unhinged, driven by instinct and the sheer fucking need to give her exactly what she just asked for.My vision whites out. I empty myself inside her with a low, guttural sound I don’t recognize as my own. My thighs start to tingle. My hands shake where they’re braced against her skin. It’s like my body forgets how to function, and all I can do is feel.I collapse on top of her, breathing heavily into the side of her neck, still deep in
The doors open into our suite, one that's perfectly designed for a honeymoon. Candles. Rose petals scattered across the floor. The hotel staff did good.I should be walking straight to the honeymoon bed, but for some reason, a bed filled with flowers seems too delicate for my first sexual encounter with my wife.I let her shoes drop to the floor, kicking mine off too, and then I take her straight outside to the private pool.She squeals when she realizes what I’m about to do. “Oh, my God, Knox. Don't you dare.”I dare.I take two quick steps and throw us both in. Her legs are around my waist, and her arms are still clutching my shoulders. She gasps as we sink in, then comes up choking on a laugh. Her glasses hang askew, and she adjusts them.That laughter soon turns into a fake glare. “You are so annoying, Knox.”“What did I do?”“You know exactly what you did. I was in the mood. Now you’ve put out the fire.”“Oh, baby…” I press her closer to me. “One touch, and I’ll get you back in t
Kxox chuckles. “I’m sure you’ll be alright.”And now it’s my turn.I take a deep breath, trying to speak around the lump in my throat. My voice wavers, but I don’t look away from him.“Well,” I say, “before I met you, I spent my entire life chasing things I thought I wanted. Boundless affection. Love. The kind of love that would make someone choose me over the entire world. Every time I thought I was close to getting it, it slipped away. And I had to start chasing all over again.”I swallow, catching my breath. “And then you came along. God, you were relentless.”He grins but doesn’t speak.“You didn’t wait for me to come around. You chased me like you already knew I was yours. And the truth is, I didn’t stand a chance. Not against these feelings that are constantly overwhelming. I couldn’t not fall in love with you, Knox.”His thumb brushes mine again as I exhale, steadying myself.“And I promise you, from this day and forever, I’ll stay. I’ll show up. I’ll keep choosing you, even o
***~~SLOANE~~***“Well,” the officiant says with a friendly smile on his face, “we’ve made it to the moment that matters most. Knox and Sloane, you’ve chosen to stand here today, just the two of you, because what you have is rare, and real, and enough. You’ve asked to exchange your own vows, so let’s begin. Knox, whenever you’re ready.”Knox’s fingers tighten around mine the second we’re given the floor.Seeing the look in his eyes, I know that I made the right decision dragging him to Vegas to get married.The chapel is small, just as we wanted. There’s a faint floral scent in the air—fake lilies, I think. The windows are frosted, making the whole place glow as light filters through.It’s the kind of peace I wouldn’t have gotten if I’d let Grandma June take over the wedding preparations.God.I’ve learned the hard way that when you’re freshly engaged and still high off that moment, the absolute worst person you can call is your grandmother. Especially when you’ve been avoiding the
I swear, in all my life, I’ve never been this hungry to kiss someone. It’s like the oxygen in my body is burning up just from holding back. I want her mouth. Her skin. All of her.But I have to control myself and wait.“I feel like you thought I was going to say no,” Sloane says. “You have this strange look in your eyes.”“You’re unpredictable.”“Really?”“I don’t always know what’s running through that pretty head of yours.”She grins. “You’re right. Because at this moment, I’m wondering why this behemoth of a man that I love is holding a ring before me and isn’t on his knees yet.”That earns a laugh from me.And I don’t waste another second.Without taking my eyes off her, I lower myself down on one knee.“Sloane Mercer,” I say. “My dearest bunny. The love of my life. Will you marry me?”She screams.It’s not a delicate sound. Not a whimper. A full-on scream that echoes against the water. Then she starts jumping—literally jumping up and down like her feet can’t stay on the ground.I
***~~KNOX~~***When something good finally finds its way into your life, especially after a long time without, it’s hard not to live in constant fear of losing it.I’ve never been this afraid in my life. Not when I took my first punch in the ring, not when I got captured overseas, not even when I watched the love of my life held at gunpoint.This is worse. Loving her is worse.Because love comes with fear. With want. With the obsessive need to know she’s okay at all times. I get these gut punches of panic when she’s not in my line of sight. I wake up in the middle of the night and reach out for her body on instinct. If she’s not there—if she’s even just in the bathroom with the door closed—I have to physically see her come out before I can lie back down.I have to check that she’s still breathing three times a night. I have to hear it. See the slow rise and fall of her back. Press a hand to her chest if I have to.And yeah, I know what that makes me. Clingy. Paranoid. A little unhin