Learning Her Lesson

Learning Her Lesson

last updateปรับปรุงล่าสุด : 2024-07-31
โดย:  LycanNSยังไม่จบ
ภาษา: English
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"Babygirl?" I asked again confused. "I call my submissive my baby girl. That's a preference of mine. I like to be called Daddy." He said which instantly turned me on. What the hell is wrong with me? " *** Iris was so excited to leave her small town home in Ohio to attend college in California. She wanted to work for a law firm one day, and now she was well on her way. The smell of the ocean air was a shock to her senses when she pulled up to Long beach, but everything was so bright and beautiful. The trees were different, the grass, the flowers, the sun, everything was different. The men were different here. Professor Ryker Lorcane was different. He was intelligent but dark. Strong but steady. Everything the boys back home were not. *** I moaned loudly as he pulled out and pushed back in slowly each time going a little deeper. "You feel so good baby girl," he said as he slid back in. "Are you ready to be mine?" He said looking at me with those dark carnal eyes coming back into focus. I shook my head, yes, and he slammed into me hard. "Speak." He ordered. "Yes Daddy, I want to be yours," I said loudly this time.

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INVISIBLETILT
INVISIBLETILT
first, you need to edit and edit some more. Everything is on 1 paragraph, including dialog. ... Which makes it seem like one long run-on sentence. Invested in the story, but it's very difficult for the reader to enjoy if they have to separate the Everything from dialog, person thoughts and events etc
2025-04-17 22:24:07
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