KABANATA 2: Dream

SLOAN

“I-Ikaw?” bulong ko habang hindi makapaniwalang nakatingin sa kaniya. I don’t know what to say. I can’t believe that the person I just met a week ago is my fiance!

“You know each other?” Daddy asked confusedly while looking at Dominic and me.

Hindi ako sumagot. I couldn’t tear my gaze away from him. His expression was a perfect blend of seriousness and intensity, as if he were trying to unravel the mysteries of the universe just by looking at me.

“We met a week ago, Mr. De Falco,” tugon niya pero ang mata niya ay nakatingin sa ‘kin. “So, she’s your daughter?” Bumaling siya kay daddy.

He used to be all smiles and friendly, but now he’s all serious and cold when talking to my dad. Parang ibang tao siya habang kinakausap ang daddy ko.

Daddy smiled. “Yes, Mr. Velasco, and she’s willing to marry you, right, dear?” Daddy turned to me. Hindi nakatakas sa paningin ko ang pagbabata sa mata niya.

Bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko dahil sa takot. Ganito ang palagi kong nararamdaman kapag nasa tabi ako ni Daddy. Gusto kong tumanggi. I am no longer interested in getting married because I am afraid of what might happen pero kagaya ng palaging nagyayari, natagpuan ko na lang ang sarili ko na tumatango. Once again, fear took the lead.

“Y-Yes, Dad,” I said.

Nagtama ang paningin namin ni Dominic. Inoobserbahan niya lang ang bawat galaw. The way he looked at me, parang hindi niya ako kilala.

“See? Huwag kang mag-alala, Mr. Velasco, she’s obedient. Sinisiguro ko sa ‘yo na hindi siya sakit sa ulo. Arellano, Golveo, and Moreau proved that,” Daddy proudly informed.

Mas lalo akong hindi makatingin ng diretso kay Dominic dahil sa sinabi ni Daddy. I feel embarrassed. I’m embarrassed for myself because I’m letting my own father manipulate me!

Kailan ba ‘ko matututong lumaban? Kailan ba ‘ko matututong bumoses para sa sarili ko? Kailan ba ‘ko hindi pangungunahan ng takot ko? Kailan ba ‘yon? Nakakapagod na kasi maging duwag.

Siguro kung ako si Dominic, hindi ko hahayaan ang sarili ko na matali sa isang kagaya ko. I am a curse! If he marries me, he could also end up dead like my previous husband!

“Are you sure that you want to marry me, Ms. De Falco?” seryosong tanong ni Dominic.

Hindi kaagad ako nakasagot. Sumulyap ako kay Daddy at nang makita ko siyang umiigting ang panga ay mabilis akong nag-iwas ng tingin.

“Y-Yes,” I muttered.

He nodded. “Good to hear.”

Umupo kami sa may sofa at doon pinagpatuloy ang pag-uusap. Habang nag-uusap si Daddy at Dominic ay pumunta sa pwesto namin si Yaya Basya. May dala siyang pitsel ng juice at sinalinan niya kami sa mga baso.

Yaya Basya and I locked eyes. Worry and protest were evident in her eyes. I couldn’t bear to see her like that, so I looked away. It’s just too much for me. Parang nanay ko na si Yaya Basya kaya nasasaktan din ako kapag nakikita ko siyang nasasaktan dahil sa mga desisyon sa akin ni Daddy.

Nang maka-alis na si Yaya ay bumaling akong muli kina Daddy. Nagtama ang paningin namin ni Dominic na marahil ay kanina pa ako pinapanood. I looked away. I don’t know, but I can’t look into his eyes. I felt guilty for an unknown reason.

“When is the wedding, Mr. Velasco?” Daddy asked.

I forgot about my dream a long time ago, so I don’t care anymore about when or where I get married. I’m just going to go with the flow and see what happens.

Dominic chuckled. “Bakit ako tinatanong mo niyan, Mr. De Falco? Your daughter should be the one you’re asking about that. Hindi lang naman ako ang ikakasal dito.”

Gulat akong napatingin sa kaniya. Hindi ko inaasahan na sasabihin niya ‘yon. Ang mga nauna ko kasing pinakasalan ay ang siyang nag-se-set ng date kung kailan at saan ang kasal.

“Sure, Mr. Velasco. If it were up to my daughter, she would want to get married next week, right—”

“No offense meant, Mr. De Falco, but I don’t want to hear that from you. I want my fiance to decide about this wedding. After all, she’s the one I'm going to marry, not you.” Dominic looked at me seriously. “Do you have any suggestions about the date?"

I don’t know what to say. Hindi ko inaasahan na sasabihin iyon ni Dominic kay Daddy. Ramdam ko ang namumuong tensiyon sa sala ng bahay namin and I honestly don’t know what to do!

Kahit hindi ako nakatingin kay Daddy ay ramdam ko ang nakakatakot niyang presensiya na tila nagbabanta na kapag nagkamali ako ng sinabi ay may hindi magandang mangyayari.

I swallowed hard. “I-I want it next week, Mr. Velasco…” I said.

Daddy smiled widely. “I told you! So, it’s settled, then? The wedding is next week.” Pumalakpak pa siya.

Dominic remained looking at me. His jaw was clenching like he was pissed. “Next week, then,” he authoritatively said.

Nagpatuloy sila sa pag-uusap.

“E-Excuse me. Restroom lang ako,” mahinang paalam ko at tumayo.

Hindi ko na hinintay ang tugon nila. Dali-dali akong naglakad papunta sa direksiyon ng banyo. It was located near the kitchen. I feel suffocated by Dominic’s stare. Pakiramdam ko kapag tinititigan niya ‘ko ay nalalaman niya lahat ng nararamdaman ko kahit wala siyang ginawa. Nalalaman niya lahat ng saloobin ko sa paraan lang nang pagtingin niya sa mga mata ko.

Tinitigan ko ang sarili ko sa malaking salamin sa loob ng banyo. Even with makeup on, the tiredness in my eyes was evident. I’m exhausted… I’m really tired of everything. When can I finally escape this kind of life? Ayaw ko nito. I just want to live a normal life like everyone else. Is that too much to ask? Why do I have to experience a life without freedom? It’s unfair.

Kapag ba pinakasalan ko si Dominic ay magkakaroon ako ng kalayaan? O kagaya rin siya ng mga nauna ‘kong asawa na tila ayaw akong maarawan? At first, they seemed like genuinely nice people. Polite, friendly, and always willing to lend a hand, but once we started living under the same roof, their true colors were revealed.

Gano’n rin kaya si Dominic?

Pero paano kung mabait talaga siya? Paano kung iba siya sa mga naging asawa ko? Paano kung siya na talaga ang makakapagpalayo sa ‘kin sa lahat ng paghihirap na ‘to?

I’m afraid to take a risk. Kinabukasan at buhay ko ang kapalit ng lahat ng ito. Natatakot ako sa maaring mangyari sa hinaharap pero mas natatakot ako sa maari kong pagsisihan dahil hindi ako sumugal.

What should I do?

“What are you doing here? Bakit hindi ka na bumalik sa loob?”

Kahit hindi ako lumingon ay alam ko kung sino iyon. Umupo si Dominic sa bench katabi ko dito sa gazebo ng garden namin. I have no idea how he found this place. This is hidden right here in our garden. Tanging ang mga tao lang sa mansion ang nakakaalam ng lugar na ito. Hindi rin kasi ito kalakihan kaya hindi masyadong pansin.

“H-How did you find me?” I asked.

Dominic smiled genuinely. Malayo sa Dominic kanina na tila yelo sa sobrang lamig ng boses at nakakatakot ang awra. It seems like the Dominic I met a week ago is back.

“Your Yaya Basya told me. I told her that I wanted to talk to you. ‘Yong tayong dalawa lang at wala ang daddy mo,” sabi niya.

“W-Why do you want to talk to me?” kinakabahang tanong kong muli.

“I want to talk to you about our wedding.”

“W-Why? H-Hindi pa ba kayo tapos mag-usap ni Daddy?”

He shrugged. “Why would I need to talk to your dad? Siya ba ang papakasalan ko? As far as I know, ikaw ang papakasalan ko kaya ikaw ang dapat kong kausapin, right?”

Natahimik naman ako. He has a point.

“S-So, what now?”

“Where do you want to get married?” paunang tanong niya dahilan upang manlaki ang mata ko.

“W-Why? I mean, b-bakit iyon kaagad ang tinanong mo?” tarantang tanong ko.

“I want to give my future wife the wedding she deserves because I believe that the wedding day is an unforgettable memory that lingers in the minds of the newlyweds. Mahirap iyong burahin. So, I will do my best to fulfill your ideal wedding as long as I am capable of doing so.”

Hindi ko alam kung ano ba ang dapat kong maramdaman sa mga naririnig ko. I’m not used to this, so I don’t know how or what I should react.

“So, where do you want to get married?” tanong ulit niya.

I gulped. “H-Honestly, I want to get married in the church,” I said.

“In the church?” he asked. “Why?”

I smiled. “I-It’s my dream…” I muttered. “G-Getting married in the church is something that holds a lot of personal significance for me… It’s n-not just about the ceremony itself, but also about the spiritual and cultural traditions that come with it… P-Plus, I find the idea of exchanging vows in a sacred space to be really m-meaningful.”

I never expected to have anyone else to talk to about my dream apart from Yaya Basya. Ang malala pa nito, fiancé ko pa ang napagsabihan ko tungkol dito!

“Do you have a wedding dream?”

I nodded. “Y-Yes.”

“What is it? Pwede ko bang malaman?”

Hindi ako sumagot. Tinitigan ko lamang siya sa asul niyang mata at pilit binabasa kung ano’ng tumatakbo sa utak niya pero wala akong napala.

I found myself telling him my dream wedding in every intricate detail. He just listened attentively, as if it were the most fascinating thing he had ever heard.

Pinabayaan niya lang kapag nauutal ako and it’s made me more comfortable with him.

“We’ll make your wedding dream come true, Sloan,” sabi niya dahilan upang mabigla ako.

“T-Talaga?” hindi makapaniwalang bulong ko.

“Of course you deserve it. Alam ko naman na hindi mo talaga gusto ang kasal na ‘to. But I needed someone to marry, and I’m sorry for dragging you into my problem. Kaya hangga’t kaya ko, ibibigay ko sa ‘yo para kahit wala mang pagmamahal ang namamagitan sa ating dalawa, hindi mo pagsisisihan na pinakasalan mo ako.”

Kinabukasan ay may pumunta sa bahay na designer para sukatan ako para daw sa wedding gown ko. Pagkatapos ay pinapili ako ng design na nakalagay sa potfolio nila. Nahirapan pa akong pumili dahil pare-parehas naman magaganda.

Never in a million years did I think I would be the one picking out my own wedding dress, especially after what happened to me. It’s like I’m living in some kind of alternate universe where I actually have control over my own life. Hindi lang ako makapaniwala… It feels surreal.

Tawagin niyo na akong exaggerated o ano pero masama bang matuwa?

My one week became busy. Maraming pumupunta sa bahay na mga organizers para kausapin ako tungkol sa kasal. Ang iba ay hinihingi ang opinyon ko tungkol sa mga pagkain, ang iba sa mga damit at designs ng simbahan. Alas-nwebe na ng gabi nang makapagpahinga ako. Hindi ko alam na ganito pala kapagod mag-prepare ng kasal lalo na’t next week na kaagad gaganapin.

I had just finished taking a bath when my phone suddenly rang. Kumunot ang noo ko nang makitang unregistered number ang naka-flash sa screen. Pinanood ko lang ‘yon na paulit-ulit na mag-ring hanggang sa mamatay ‘yon. I have this little hobby of mine where I simply refuse to answer calls from numbers that aren’t registered on my phone.

Pagkatapos mamatay ng tawag ay bigla na lang may nag-pop up na message sa notification ko, mabilis ko naman ‘yong binasa.

From: Unknown number

Hey, it’s Dominic. Still up? Can you pick up my call?

Magta-type na sana ako ng reply sa kaniya ngunit muli na naman siyang tumawag. Nag-aalinlangan pa ‘kong sagutin no’ng una pero sinagot ko pa rin kalaunan.

“H-Hello?” nag-aalinlangang bungad ko.

“Hey? How’s your day?” he asked.

I gulped. “I-It’s good. Medyo pagod lang,” utal na tugon ko.

“I’m sorry if I can’t help with the wedding preparations; I’m just taking care of something important,” he apologized.

“I-It’s fine. I actually enjoyed b-being hands-on during our wedding preparation kahit m-medyo nakakapagod.”

He chuckled at the other line. “I’m glad that you enjoyed it. I want you to experience that.”

“A-Ang alin?”

“I want you to experience being hands-on at your wedding. Minsan lang maranasan ng isang babae ‘yon,” sagot niya.

Natigilan naman ako roon. He’s right. Kahit tatlong beses na akong kinasal ay hindi ko man lang naranasan ang ganito. Iyong kay Frederick kasi ay siya lang naman ang nag-plano no’n kasama ang magulang niya. Wala naman akong ambag roon.

Dumating ang araw ng kasal, ramdam na ramdam ko ang mabilis na pagtibok ng puso ko habang nakatayo sa malaking double door ng simbahan.

Masaya ako na kinakabahan at the same time, natatakot. Masaya ako na kinakabahan dahil sa wakas ay matutupad ko na ang pangarap ko. Natatakot naman ako dahil sa maaaring maging bunga ng desisyong ito.

As the double doors of the church slowly swing open, revealing the breathtaking interior, my heart skips a beat. The church is adorned with an elegant and timeless design. The pews are gracefully arranged, leading towards the altar, where Dominic awaits.

The color scheme of the wedding interior is a harmonious blend of ivory and gold. Delicate floral arrangements embellish the ends of each pew, filled with soft roses and cascading greenery. The aisle is lined with flickering candles, casting a warm glow on the beautiful décor.

Nang magsimula na akong maglakad sa pasilyo patungo sa altar, napalibutan ng malumanay na tugtog ang buong simbahan. The song playing is a soothing instrumental piece that feels like a warm embrace. Pakiramdam ko ay niyayakap ako nito upang matanggal ang kaba ko.

The guests, seated on either side of the aisle, are dressed in their finest attire. Their faces radiate joy and excitement, and their smiles and teary eyes capture the emotions of the moment. I saw my dad smiling. Iyon ang unang beses na makita ko siyang ngumiti ng gano’n pagkatapos mamatay ni Mommy.

Hindi pamilyar sa akin ang ibang bisita, marahil ay mga kakilala iyon ni Dominic kaya hindi pamilyar sa akin.

As I reached the altar, Dominic delicately held my hand. Ate Beeba, Yaya Basya’s daughter and my bride’s maid, flashed me a radiant smile before going to her seat.

Nagtama ang paningin namin ni Dominic. He looks good in his classic black tuxedo, tailored to perfection, which accentuates his tall and lean physique. The crisp white dress shirt provided a sharp contrast, while the black bowtie added a touch of elegance. He completed his look with a pair of polished black leather shoes.

“You’re so gorgeous,” Dominic complemented.

I smiled. “T-Thank you… Ikaw d-din.”

The ceremony went smoothly. Walang naging problema.

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the presence of God and these witnesses to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony. Before we proceed, I would like to remind you both of the sacred commitment you are about to make. Marriage is a lifelong covenant, a union of two souls, and a promise to love, honor, and cherish one another,” the priest said.

Tumango naman kaming dalawa ni Dominic tanda na naiintindihan namin ang pinupunto niya.

“Do you, Dominic Adam Velasco, take Sloan Beatrice De Falco, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?”

“I do, father,” Dominic responded.

“Do you, Sloan Beatrice De Falco, take Dominic Adam Velasco, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?”

Tumango ako. “I-I do, father.”

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”

Dominic carefully lifted my veil, taking his time to reveal my face. With deliberate slowness, he leaned in and pressed his lips against mine, delivering a gentle and tender kiss. It was as if time stood still, and in that moment, I felt a rush of emotions overwhelming me. The way he kissed me, so softly and intimately, made my heart skip a beat.