[Fia's POV]
KANINA pa sumasakit ang panga ko sa kakatawa. I was glad that Eric got to show me around with the members of the production. Si Kempoy ang kasalukuyang nagdadaldal. He's the set designer and he has a deadpan sense of humor. He cracks a joke without smiling. Tapos, ang cute cute pa niyang magsalita kasi chubby yung mukha niya. He kinda reminds me of Majin Buu in Dragon Ball Z. Hindi ko na pinansin si Kayden magmula kanina. Mukhang plano yata niyang magpakamatay sa gutom. Bahala siya. Baka pinakain narin siya nung aristang lumalandi sa kanya.
"Poy, awat na 'di na makahinga si Fia," puna ni Alvi na siya namang props manager.
"Okay lang. Gusto ko nga eh. Ang pamatay ng mga orig niyang banat," I answered, still laughing.
"Hayaan mo na ako P're minsan ngalang makapagdala ng magandang dilag si boss sa set." Tumikhim si Kempoy. "Ito pa isa." He said, running his fingers through his curly hair. "Fia, aso ka ba?"
Nagtatanong palang siya pero natatawa na ako. "Bakit?"
"Nauulol kasi ako kapag ka napapangiti ka."
Nasapo ko ang bibig ko sa pagpipigil na muling kumawala ang halakhak ko. It wasn't his joke but his face that was funny. Sinubukan kong pigilan ang pagtawa dahil ayokong bulabugin ang buong set. Baka marinig ako ni Kayden. Si Eric na naka upo sa tabi ko ay napailing iling lang ring ngumingiti.
"Epic P're, ang corny!" komenton ni Alvi.
"A-yoko na Kempoy... Awat na," I said in between laughter. Sakit na sakit narin ang tiyan ko sa kakatawa.
"That's enough, Poy. Baka kabagin na si Fia sa kakatawa," said Eric.
Kanina habang naguusap kami, naikwento nila sa sa'kin na perfectionist daw talaga si Kayden kapag ka nag su-shooting. Minsan nga daw umaabot sila ng isang araw sa pagkuha lang ng tatlo o apat na eksena. Tapos kapag ka tapos na ang shooting isa-isa paraw ulit nitong niri-review ang mga final scenes. Kapag ka may napuna pa ulit itong hindi ayon sa panlasa nito ay ulit na naman daw sila niyon kinabukasan.
Pero as a head of the whole production team ay magaling daw talaga ito. Mairi-respeto daw talaga ito bilang director. And according to Kempoy, one thing that he likes about Kayden ay very generous daw ito. He always makes sure that the whole production team's needs were attented. Wala daw itong pakialam sa gastos. So as he could perfect his craft. Sabi nga nila marami naraw naipanalong Indie Films si Kayden abroad. Iyon ngalang, huwag lang daw umano itong gagalitin. Kasi iba daw itong mag beast mode.
No one messes with Kayden's temper," said Alvi kanina.
Nasermunan nga daw nito ang isa sa mga artista nito kagabi dahil daw lasing. Alam naman daw nitong magkakaroon sila ng shooting ngayon.
Kaya pala medyo bad mood siya kagabi. But it was only for awhile dahil ginawa na naman niya akong pulutan ng pang-aasar niya. Nakakainis parin siya at hindi ka-impress impress. Tsaka, baka nagpapaka good shot lang talaga siya sa mga crew niya. Kating-kati na nga akong siraan siya, pero, syempre, mabait akong tao kaya I decided to just keep my mouth shut.
"Sigurado ka ba talagang secretary ka ni boss Kayden?" tanong ni Kempoy.
"Oo nga."
"Kapagka magdadala ng babae si boss, iba kasi pumapasok sa isip namin. Alam mo naman siguro na lady killer iyan."
No need to tell me Kempoy. Alam na alam ko iyan. I had a first-hand observation of him being a manwhore.
"Alam ko," I said, almost rolling my eyeballs. "At tsaka 'di ko siya type kaya imposible iyang iniisip niyo."
Ngumisi si Kempoy. "Ako type mo?"
Binatukan siya ni Alvi. "Tado, umayos ka. Susumbong kita sa asawa mo."
"Ito naman, joke lang."
'Di ko na naman napigilang matawa. Ang cute cute kasi talaga ni Kempoy.
"Guys, I guess that's enough," awat ni Eric. "Nagugutom kana ba, Fia?"
Nilingon ko si Eric sa tabi ko. "Uhm...oo,"nahihiya kong sagot. It had been four hours since I ate. Gutom na ulit ako.
"Sabay na tayong kumain."
Tumango akong napangiti. I felt good that the people around were so nice. Nagpaalam kami kina Kempoy at Alvi. They were currently back to discussing things about the film. Sumeryoso na ulit sila.
Eric and I were about to leave ng makarinig ako ng malakas na tikhim.Sabay kaming lahat na napalingon sa kung saan man iyon nanggaling. Sa amoy palang niya. I could almost guess who it was.
At hindi nga ako nagkakamali. Kayden was standing in front of me, giving me a stoic face.
"Kanina pa ako nagugutom. Dalhan mo ako ng pagkain sa sasakyan. Dalhin mo rin ang bag ko," saka niya nilingon sina Kempoy at Alvi. "Kayong dalawa, I need you to work closely with me. Huwag kayong lalayo hangga't hindi ako nagpapatawag ng break."
Napakamot ang dalawa sa batok. "Opo boss."
Eric glared at me but Kayden cut him off. "Pare, paki review ng last two shots after the break."
Bumalik muli ang tingin ni Kayden sa'kin. He made a face, giving me a silent message."Ano pang hinihintay mo?Move now, Fia."
"Oo na! Sandali lang," naiinis kong sagot saka ako nagdadabog na napalakad takbo.
Bwisit talaga siya! Sarap tusukin ng eyeballs. Sama talaga ng ugali!
ALAM kong meat lover si Kayden ( that probably explains why he owns a steak house) kaya good for five servings ang beef steak na kinuha ko. Good for five servings narin yung rice. Kesa pabalikin niya ako sa set at pakuhanin ulit. Mabuti na'ng naninigurado. Ang layo-layo pa naman kung saan niya naipark itong pick-up niya. Mukhang nanadya talaga.
And why the hell would he want to eat in his pick up? Pwede naman siyang maki-join sa team? Pa presyo pa! Arte niya!
He has a portable table and chair na inilatag ko sa harap ng pick-up, sa ilalim ng puno ng niyog. I've already set his meal. May paper plate, kutsara, tinidor, canned soda, at bottled water. Kumuha narin ako ng minatamis na saging na saba baka sakaling gusto rin niyang mag-dessert. Kapag ka pinabalik pa niya ako ay hindi ko na alam. Malamang matotoo ko ang pagtusok sa eyeballs niya. Inalok ako ng tulong ng isa sa mga crew kanina, naawa yata. Pero ayaw ko na kasing mang-abala. Alam kong gutom narin silang lahat. Si Kayden ay nakikipag usap parin kasi nun kay Eric.
I fished out my phone from my bag and decided to call Alice since wala pa naman si Kayden. But I couldn't find a good signal at my post kaya lumayo-layo ako ng bahagya.
I badly want to talk to one of my friends now. Hindi naman kasi secretary ang kailangan ni Kayden. Yaya.
Sobra siyang nakakabadtrip.
"Ugh!" I grunted ng wala talaga akong signal na nasagap. I went back to the truck at nakitang nandoon na si Kayden. May kausap sa phone. Nakatalikod siya kaya malamang 'di niya ako napansin.
"Cas, I'll be there after a week, okay? Please tell them...Yeah, I missed you too. Iyakap mo ako kay mommy.Tell her I miss her and I love her... I promise, sabihin mong huwag na siyang magtampo..." He paused and ran his fingers over his hair. "I'd be kicked out on my own birthday?" Bahagya siyang tumawa. "I'll try, sweetheart. Sobrang busy lang si kuya ngayon. I'll try to make it up after this week... Alright. I'll see you... I love you, too."
Tumalikod na ako bago pa niya ako mahuling nakikinig. That had to be Cassy. Siguro ay nagtatampo na ang pamilya ni Kayden sa kanya. Malamang hindi na siya umuuwi sa kanila. Maybe aside from his uber busy schedule ay mga babae talaga ang isa sa mga pinagkakabusihan niya. At teka...bakit may signal siya? I ignored him and pretended to be fidgeting with my phone.
"Where's my coffee?"
Nagulantang ako sa naging tanong niya. Arrrgg! Don't tell me....Paglalakarin niya uli ako sa set? And it was midnoon for goodness sake?! Seriously magkakape siya?
Napapikit ako, pilit huminga ng malalim saka napaharap. I was ready to fire rants at him but my tongue seemed to backfire when he removed his shirt in front of me. Takte naman! Bakit sa harap ko pa siya maghuhubad?
"A-no bang ka-pe gusto... mo?" I tried to straighten my traitor tongue for stuttering and focused on his face. But geez, how in hell did he ever have that to-die-for of a body? Ang alam ko matakaw si Kayden. Noong mga bata pa kami kapag ka kumakain kami sa hapag ng bahay nila, lahat ng karne sinosolo niya. Hindi siya kumakain ng gulay. Inuoto pa nga niya ang mga kapatid niya para mapunta sa kanya ang karne at gulay naman sa mga ito.
"A-nong kape?" I unconsciously bit my lips, kasi naman ano bang tinitingnan niya? Was he looking at my legs? I made a face. "W-what?"
He wrinkled his nose habang tuloy na nagpupunas sa basa niyang katawan. His eyes were on my face now. "Huwag nalang. Let's just eat."
I almost sigh in relief kundi lang sa nakakabwisit na naman niyang hirit.
"Palitan mo 'yang shorts mo. Wala kabang dalang mas mahaba diyan? Ang pangit ng legs mo."
Mangiyak ngiyak kong muntik nang mabato ang cellphone ko sa mukha niya, kundi lang siya umalis at prente nang naupo sa hinanda kong mesa.
Wala pang nagsabing pangit ang legs ko. Infact, most people told me that it's the best part of my body. Asset ko raw ang mapuputi at mahaba kong legs. Bulag ba siya?
"Ano bang hinihintay mo, Fia? Mag bihis kana," I heard him snapped when I didn't budge.
Nag-alok ngang kumain pero nanginsulto naman. Sino bang tao ang nakakatagal sa ugali niya? Buti napagtatyagaan talaga siya ng mga tao niya sa set.
Dahil sa gutom na ako ay hindi nalang ako sumagot at inis na sinunod ang gusto niya.
"SATISFIED?" napaismid kong tanong kay Kayden matapos kong makapagbihis sa loob ng sasakyan niya. I wore the longest denim shorts that was available but it was still short. Nasa kalahati parin ng hita ko ang taas.Napakunot ang noo niyang napatitig sa mga binti ko. His adam's apple bobbing up and down. "That's the most decent you have?"
Pumamewang ako at pinatirik ang mga mata. "Ikaw kaya ang pagmadaliin ng empake sa tingin mo makakapili pa ako ng desenteng damit? Kasalanan mo 'to eh!"
"Whatever," he dismissed. " Umupo kana."
Since I was too hungry to argue with him ay hindi na ako nagpakipot. Buti nga may konsensiya siyang alokin ako. I set up the extra foldable chair na itinabi ko sa gilid ng truck at inilagay sa harap niya. I also got my own share of food na itinabi ko sa sasakyan. I remembered the last time we ate naka dalawang order siya ng steak. Baka kulang pa kasi sa kanya iyong five servings.
" Why this is too much?" komento niya ng ilapag ko ang share ko ng pagkain.
"Matakaw ka. Baka nga kulang pa 'yan sa'yo. Pabalikin mo pa ako sa set,"sagot kong nakaismid and started digging on my food. Sunod sunod ang ginawa kong pagsubo. Hindi ko na siya pinansin. He's asking me to look decent eh siya nga, nasa harap ng pagkain at n*******d.
"Hinay hinay lang baka mabulunan ka," he commented, chuckling.
I took a spoonful of rice bago ako nag-angat ng mukha. I wanted to roll my eyes at him again but goodness, why is he giving me that look again? Kayden's eyes weren't something right? Elj has the same chinky lovable eyes. Ano namang kinaiba ng sa kanya?
Wala! Mapagnasa lang kasi siyang tumingin, defended my conscience.
Yes! He had a look of a man who's only after lustful motives while Elj had a look of a man with pure unadulterated intentions, my alter ego suppressed even more.
Iyon ang kaibahan nila.
"Don't stare too much, hindi naman ako mawawala," he said his eyes smiling saka niya inangat ang isa niyang kamay para punasan ang gilid ng bibig ko. "Ang dugyot mong kumain," he added and went into digging on his food like nothing happened. Pero shit lang. Why in the hell is my heart haywiring again?
He just brushed off some spilled sauce at the side of my mouth. Iyon lang iyon, I convinced myself.
And You were only caught off guard! Like last night. 'Di ka sanay na ginugulat,
sulsol naman ng konsensiya ko.I went into digging my own food too. I couldn't find my tongue. Nagsisipag-alsahan na naman ang mga traidor kong pulso.
What is wrong with me? Kinikilabutan lang talaga ako diba? Kilabot ng sindak? Like I would let this jerk touch me? Ni presensiya nga niya hindi ko nga ma take na tagalan.
I took a sigh and went on battling with my own self for God knows how long, hanggang sa namalayan kong tapos na siyang kumain. Ako, subo parin ng subo. Tumayo si Kayden at may kung sinong tinawagan sa phone.
Hindi ko talaga matimpla ang ugali niya. He's too complex. Very mercurial. Ngayon seryoso, mamaya mapang-asar, seryoso, tapos mapang-asar uli.
"Kapag tapos kanang kumain. Pumasok kana sa sasakyan. You aren't going back to the set,"maya-maya ay untag niya.
Napainom ako ng tubig. "Saan ako pupunta?"
"I hahatid kita sa cottage. Tulungan mo si Nanay Marla na maghanda ng hapunan. Labhan mo narin ang mga nahubad kong damit."
"Ano?!"
"You heard it, Fia. Now, make it quick. I still have a shoot on hand." Then he turned his back and went inside the truck.
[Fia's POV]I'M SCHEDULEDfor an elective cesarean section tomorrow and everything wouldn't sink into me still. Ayaw kong magkaroon ng hiwa ang tiyan ko but Kayden do not want to put my life on risk. My baby boy (turned out opposite from my vision) abruptly increased on my third trimester and became a macro baby weighing almost 9.5 pounds now at my 38th week. Can you imagine how small I am carrying a big baby inside my tummy? My amniotic fluid abruptly increased too and I've developed gestational diabetes along the way. My extremities are swelling and I looked like an ugly bloated fat panda. The worst, umitim ang ilang parte ng katawan ko--my neck, my underarm, my bikini line.My self-esteem is at its lowest and I don't know if I can still get back into shape at kung maibabalik ko pa ang dating kul
[Fia's POV]My Baby,I've always dreamed of giving you a letter ever since we were kids but failed. I've lost count how many letters I've written just to express how sorry I am for making you cry every time I pissed you off. I tried handing them to you, all of it, but I fall short of bravery. I was afraid that you won't take them or you won't read them like how you'd read the letters of my brother. I've watched how your beautiful eyes glow and glimmer with sheer delight every time he hands you his letters. I was scared that I won't see the same vibe from your eyes once you read mine. There were even times that I would only look at you from afar while you read his letters and I couldn't help but envy. How I wished I could also put a smile on your cute little lips or could arouse a gi
[Fia's POV] "Daddy I want a pigtail hairstyle! I don't want this lousy braided ponytail!"My little girl pouted while she removed the pink band her daddy tied on her copper curly hair. A smile broke on my lips. Our little girl looked so cute with her crinkled round chocolate brown eyes and pouted red little lips. She was already three years old and she had grown so pretty and adorable. Only, she could get a handful at times. Kasalanan rin ng daddy niya dahil masyado niyang ini-spoil ang anak namin. Her daddy sighed and took the pink band on her hand."I thought you liked the pony. You've been asking me to do that hairstyle for so long. You said it's your favorite."
[Fia's POV]Myshoulders were shaking and my eyes were blinded with tears as Kayden sauntered to my side, his moistened eyes fixed on mine. His eyes that always know what I feel. His eyes that speak to me now of how much he loves me."Kay-den..."I muttered softly, my voice shaking.Though I was weak and strictly in complete bed rest ay sinikap ko na bumangon agad. I was about to jump into his arms when he caught me with his and shut me into a tight embrace. Sobrang mahigpit na mahigpit ko rin siyang niyakap at tuluyan na akong napahagulhol. I hardly buried my face against his chest, taking into my senses his homey and incomparable warmth, his subtle comfort, his all too familiar scent, his heavy breathing, his erratic heartb
[Kayden's POV]I have never loved a woman to the point of losing myself. Since I started to recognize my feelings for her, she was the only one that I care about. I put her on a pedestal, taking away my pride, swallowing every ton of hurt that I feel whenever I don't hear a comeback I love you from her, giving her every favor though I feel like she had only kept me for her use. Kinaya kong lahat ng iyon because I was determined that eventually, I will have her heart.And I thought I did. But I just thought.Sinubukan kong gumalaw but I couldn't move a muscle. My head hurts from taking in over a dose of alcohol. I tried to move my hands but they hurt the same too. I might have broken every knuckle I have from beating the wall of this room. Ni hindi ko na kinayang umabot sa kama. I wasn't able to make it to bed last night because I've passed out when I've drained all my force of beating the wall. Ang natatandaan ko, hinatid ako ni Dino dito para m
[Fia's POV] "UHMMM..."I moaned to a slight pain that I feel in my tummy. The weird smell of medicine and antiseptic automatically filled my nostril. Binuksan ko ang mga mata ko at napatitig sa kabuoan ng silid. Agad ko namang nakita ang mga kaibigan ko. Alice was sitting in a stool beside my bed. Si Louise at si Mikaela naman ay sa isang couch malapit sa pinto. Kinutuban na agad ako ng masama. I put a hand in my tummy at pinakiramdaman ang baby ko. "Fia?! Thank God, you're awake!"Alice stood up from her stool at lumapit sa'kin."Kamusta na ang pakiramdam mo? May masakit ba sa'yo?"She framed a hand to my cheek. Napatango ako at nag iinit ang mga matang napatitig sa kanya."