Chapter 10

Two weeks had gone by and I had only come out of my room for softball, food and to use the bathroom. Every time I thought about Keegan it hurt. Mom says this is depression. I’d love for it to go away that’s for sure.

Keegan leaves for college today. They were having a send off for him at his mom’s house. Baylen said I should come, but I hadn’t spoken to Keegan or seen him in two weeks. It just didn’t feel right. I had things to do around the house after softball anyways.

At practice I knew I wasn’t myself. I couldn’t pitch a strike to save my life and I couldn’t hit the ball. Coach said she understood where my head was at after we spoke and she sent me home an hour early. Usually I would be sad about something like that, but I truly just wanted to go home and be alone.

“Brees, are you ok?” Jagger asked as I scrambled to pack my bag.

I sat stone-faced for a second and then felt tears start to well up in my eyes. I shook my head as I stuffed my helmet into my bag.

“He is leaving and he hasn’t even come to see me once. I’m just so broken,” I said, throwing my bag over my shoulder.

I squeezed her hand and gave a quick smile before heading to my car. I couldn’t stand to be around anyone right now. My whole body ached.

When I got home, I left my bag inside of the car. I felt too weak to even bring it inside. It was all hitting me that Keegan was leaving for school today and that would be it. He hadn’t sent a message through Baylen, hadn’t sent one on my socials or even stopped by. It was over. Everything I had waited for, for so long. It was over. I yearned to taste his kiss and feel his arms wrap me in warmth. I almost forgot what it felt like to be loved by him. I laid on the sofa for over an hour. As I was losing my mind laying on the couch with the shades drawn, I heard the doorbell ring. Who in the world could be here? Everyone that I know is at Keegan’s going away party. I reluctantly got off of the couch to see who it was. To my surprise it was Casey and Jagger. They had bags full of snacks and two boxes of tissue.

“Hey James. We are here for you my girl. Jagger called me after practice, so I decided to come here instead of to Keegan’s party. Cause fuck him, right?” Casey said.

“Oh my gosh guys. This is so kind of you. I probably look a mess and I didn’t even shower after practice,” I said, smelling my armpit.

“It’s ok James. We fully expect you to smell like a foot and look like hell for the next two months,” Casey teased.

“I’m glad we can be here for you. I know it’s a major shift but you aren’t alone,” Jagger said, handing me a box of tissues.

“I just keep replaying what happened over and over in my mind, trying to figure out what went wrong exactly. Our moms were the ones he had an issue with. But he is taking it out on me. He completely shut me out,” I said, shaking my head in disbelief.

“Don't worry about him. You didn’t do anything besides love him,” Casey quipped. “So we brought games! And we got all of your favorite snacks. Let’s take your mind off of him at least for now,” Casey said, pulling out The Game Of Life.

“Perfect. Beating you guys in games will surely make me feel better,” I said, trying my hardest to make a joke.

It did lighten my heart while we played games and laughed. Jagger sang some songs and danced around to try to cheer me up. Her blonde hair was pulled back by a headband and her curls fell down to her waist. Her large bangle bracelets clanked loudly as she pranced around the living room. Watching her move her hips so rhythmically mesmerized me.

“I’ve gotta head to the little girls room. Excuse me a moment,” Casey said, hopping to her feet.

She disappeared around the corner. Jagger proceeded to her turn on the game. She rolled the dice, but did not like the numbers so she attempted to roll again. I grabbed at her hand to stop her and she playfully pulled away. I sat up to get the dice away but she put them behind her back. I tried to grab them and in that moment I ended up on her lap as well fell to the floor.

Our laughing started to slow as we realized we were practically laying on top of one another. My hair fell into her face. She pushed it back with her hand. At this moment it didn’t feel like we were friends. There was a clear tension between the two of us and neither of us had acted on it yet. Her hands slowly went up my back as she helped me back up. Still sitting way too close, I could feel her breath on my face. Her eyes went to my lips. I wanted her to kiss me, but how did I let her know? I cupped her face with one hand and scooted closer. She smiled seductively and licked her lips as if to prepare them for me.

“Brees… I have been wanting to tell you something for a while,” she said.

A loud scream came from the bathroom area. We pulled apart quickly and went to check on Casey.