JENNA
MIDNIGHT.
“It’s Christmas Eve!” sambit ni Topher nang marinig namin kapwa ang tunog ng grandfather clock habang sine-set up niya ang pose ko sa tabi ng armchair na hinila niya sa work room. At yes, may grandfather clock si Topher sa library ng bahay niya. And I really liked that clock. In fact, I like how he designed his place. Masculine, traditional, and yet may mga shades ng black and chrome na masculine na masculine. Kasing authentic nang pagkakakilala ko sa kanya.I was back in the room where I woke up so I could get naked of the clothes I borrowed from him that night. Saka ko sinuot ang panlalaking robe na sabi niya ay itakip ko muna sa katawan ko at props sa pose ko. And now, it’s Christmas. Napabuntunghininga ako nang malalim. “Akala ko talaga darating ang Christmas Eve na wala akong pakialam sa season, or probably passed out. Mali ako. But I like the change. I like this.”Ngumiti siya. “Merry Christmas, Jenna,” sabi ni Topher habang bahagyang lumalayo. “Sorry, wala akong gift.”“Anong gift? Ang dami mo na ngang gift na bigay sa ‘kin. You were there when I passed out after getting stupidly drunk. You took me home and cleaned me up. who even does that nang walang kalokohang naiisip?”I heard a snort from him. “Paano ka naman nakasiguro na wala akong naiisip na kalokohan?”Ikiniling ko ang ulo ko. “Meron ba?”Umikot ang kanyang mga mata at tumawa siya. “Bakit naman ako aamin kung meron nga?”“Topher!” Pinalo ko siya sa braso. Tumatawa siyang umiwas, saka nakangisi pero nakakunot-noong tumitig sa akin.“I’ve gone through that question enough times to know na delikadong tanong ‘yan. So, kung sasabihin kong meron, magagalit ka ba? Kung sasabihin ko namang wala, maiinsulto ka ba?”Napatawa ako. “Meron pa. Kung sasabihin mong wala, bakla ka ba?” “See, ‘di ba? Dehado? Kaya hindi na lang ako sasagot.”“Honestly. Hindi ako magagalit.”At nakita ko noong namula ang buong mukha niya habang nag-iisip siya kung anong mga salita ang gagamitin niya para sumagot sa tanong ko. “Hmm… oh well. That’s fine, huwag ka nang sumagot. So pasado ako sa panlasa mo. Maganda ang taste mo, kung gano’n,” sambit ko habang pinapaypayan ang mukha ko nang pabiro na parang nahihiya rin ako. Saka ako natatawang umiwas noong kunwari gagamitin niya ang isa niyang paintbrush sa mukha ko.Wew. Awkward moment done. “Saka you cheered me up when I woke up miserable and you’ve fed me with the wonderful cooking of your mother. You’ve made my Christmas Eve into something good when it could have been meaningless and painful. Ako ang wala pang gift sa ‘yo. But… Merry Christmas to you, too.”“Meron kang gift. Binigyan mo ako ng solusyon sa problema ko. I finally found the model. Imagine? You landed onto my lap as if pinadala ka ng mga anghel sa langit, drunk and all pliant to help me out?”Nagtawanan na naman kaming dalawa. Effort na effort talaga kami para maiwasan ang sobrang awkward sanang sandaling iyon na babae ako at sure akong hindi siya bakla, tapos wala akong saplot kahit ano sa ilalim ng robe niya. Hindi pa iyon ang moment. Tumatawa pa rin ako, pero nasa pwesto na siya na dapat niyang kapwestuhan, at nilagay na niya ako sa pose na sabi niya’y kailangan kong gawin. The next thing to do was… “Okay. Here is your Christmas gift unwrapped… your model,” sabi ko sa pinasigla at pinakaswal na tinig kahit nagdarambol ang dibdib ko sa gagawin ko. Bago pa ako umurong sa hiya, hinawakan ko ang dalawang lapel ng robe na suot ko, at ibinaba ko ang robe sa hubad kong mga balikat hanggang sa bumagsak iyon sa halos kalahati ng aking katawan, sa bandang pinakamaliit na bahagi ng aking beywang.I did it for effect, for the moment, because it just was timely and spontaneous. Hindi ko inasahan na matutulala siya.1… 2… 3 seconds…“Topher?” I resist the urge to snap my fingers in front of his face.Kumurap siya. Tapos, unti-unting namula ang buo niyang mukha bago siya nagbaba ng tingin. “I’m sorry. You caught me by surprise.”Napangiwi ako. Pero ang totoo, gusto kong ngumiti nang ngiting ngiti. ‘Cause it was flattering as hell. “Ooops. Sorry.”“No, it’s okay.” Saka siya sa wakas tumingin sa mukha ko. “It’s just... you got a beautiful body, Jenna. That’s it.”Mukha ko naman ang unti-unting nag-init. As if possible pa ba iyon gayong mainit na ang mga pisngi ko noong hinuhubad ko pa lang ang roba? “Thank you,” sabi ko sa marahang tinig, nahihiya pero busog na busog naman ang pride sa kanyang obvious na paghanga. “Take that, Keith. Ito ang nawala sa ‘yo, katawang pang-obra maestra,” sabi ko pa. Biro sana iyon. Pero iyong sarcasm… totoo.”He was trying not to smile, I could see that. “He’s gonna eat his tongue kapag nakita niya ang obra ko,” sabi niya pa.Namilog ang mga mata ko. Pero tinatagan ko ang loob ko sa posibilidad na makikita nga ni Keith ang painting. “O-Oo.”“Don’t you dare change your mind.”“Hindi,” sagot ko, and that sounded decisive enough that he nodded. Tapos, nakatingin siya muli sa akin… kritikal ang mga mata, at nag-relax ako sa pose ko, nadamay sa halatang pagbabago niya ng mood… trabaho na.Lumapit siya uli mula sa canvas. “Okay, so… ganito. Itaas mo ito nang konti. Let’s ease this a little bit further to tease the eyes. And slouch a little, para mas natural. Then look back there, put a little smile on your lips. Lower your eyes a little, Jenna. There. You look flushed and satisfied and happy. Perfect!”Umurong siya. Naurungan niya ang stool sa harap ng easel at natumba iyon tuloy. Nagmamadali niya iyong itinayo, saka niya tinungo ang work table kung saan nakahilera ang mga paints at mga bote ng brushes. May kinuha siyang kung ano, saka siya muling bumaling sa akin.Natumba na naman ang stool. Nasanggi na naman kasi niya iyon.“Is there something wrong?” nangingiti kong tudyo.“I’m fine!”Napahagikhik na ako. I didn’t think he’s fine. “I’m sorry, Jenna,” sabi na naman niya sa hiyang hiyang tinig. “I’ll be okay.”“Okay.”Nagsimula siyang mag-sketch sa ibabaw ng canvas. I could only see him in the periphery of my vision because of the way my head was turned. I could see him when he’s taking too long to look at me. I could see it when his hand would just stop in mid-air as he just watched me, forgetting what he’s supposed to be doing. So, I started conversation because he was nervous. “So, wala ang family mo. Wala rin ang girlfriend mo. Or… meron ba? I didn’t think I’d heard sa work kung married ka na.”“No, I’m not married. At walang girlfriend.”“Wala?” ulit ko, habang nararamdaman ang paglukso ng puso ko sa loob ng dibdib ko. I shouldn’t be feeling this, but I was! Gah!“None.”“Busy masyado sa work?” Saglit ko siyang sinulyapan. Focused na focused ang mga mata niya sa canvas this time.“We broke up pretty recently so hindi pa ako ready for another one.”“Oh,” disappointed kong sabi. So, he was as heartbroken as me. Drat. “What happened?”“She… ran into a previous boyfriend and she realized she never stopped loving him and wanted to be back with him.”“And…?”“I let her go. She’s a cancer survivor. She’s been through enough. She has to be with someone who can make her really happy.”Napatingin ako uli sa kanya, sandaling natutulala. Nakikita ko sa mukha niya ang sakit na dinanas niya sa pagpapalaya sa ex-girlfriend niya. Nakikita ko roon na mahal na mahal niya talaga ang babae.I wish I can be as lucky as your ex, naisip ko na lang. At natilihan ako kasi ayokong malaman niyang ni naisip ko iyon. I knew that we’d flirted a little bit kanina para matulungan ang isa’t isa na mag-relax. But this little envious thought of mine was too much.“I am so sorry,” nasambit ko sa mahinang tinig.Ngumiti siya. Iyong klase ng ngiti na mabilis at pilit. But it did not last that long before he’s really smiling, albeit sadly. “Thank you but I really am okay. I mean, it still hurts kapag naiisip ko. It’s just been three months. I still miss her sometimes.” Sandali siyang yumuko. “But… alam kong masaya siya so I couldn’t… it takes the edge off the pain. Minsan kapag maganda ang meaning behind sa sacrifice, I guess matamis pa rin ang sakit.” Tapos, tinawanan niya ang sarili. “God, what’s wrong with me? Kanina pa ako baduy.”Napangiti rin ako. Nilagyan ko pa ng tunog ang tawa ko para hindi niya maramdamang nag-iisa siya. Nagdaan ang ilang sandali ng katahimikan habang binabalik ko muli ang sarili ko sa pose. But something else was going on. He was not sketching anymore.Bahagya kong binaling ang tingin ko para makita ko siya nang diretso. Inangat ko ang mga kilay ko, nagtatanong nang tahimik.“I’m sorry, Jenna. I just can’t concentrate enough.”“Why?”Ibinaba niya ang charcoal niyang hawak sa work desk, then he fletched his fingers. Kamao, bukas-palad, kamao uli, then bukas uli. “I… I don’t know. Too emotional and on edge. I’d calm down in a bit.”Ilang sandali ko siyang pinanood. I could feel the sexual tension in the air. I knew it’s the reason he couldn’t focus. He couldn’t even look at me anymore. “Topher?”Reluctant siyang tumingin sa tawag ko. “Yes, Jenna?” sagot niya sa tinig na bahagyang paos.Fingers strumming on my heartstrings.It felt good.Tuluyan ko nang binagsak ang roba mula sa katawan ko.JENNABUMAGSAK din ang panga niya, gaya kanina.Then his eyes darkened with the unchecked arousal. At napalunok ako. Kasi kung kanina, kung hindi ko man sinadyang nakita ang pagpitik ng pagnanasa sa mukha niya, ngayon ay ni hindi niya na iyon makontrol.“It’s been a long time?” tanong ko.Pipi siyang tumango.Ngumiti ako. “I haven’t seen any man look at me like that and it makes me really feel okay about my body now. Thank you.”Nag-angat sa mukha ko ang mga mata niya. “Jenna, I…” Lumunok siya. Pinanood ko ang pag-angat at pagbaba ng kanyang Adam’s apple. The hungry way he looked at me… I hungered for that, too.“You already know I wore my sexy underwear this morning for a reason?”Muli siyang tumango, saka napapikit nang mariin. At nabisto kong hindi siya naging ganoon entirely ka-successful sa pag-iiwas ng mga mata kaninang hinubaran niya ako nang marumi kong mga damit. Totoong meron siyang naramdaman.Yay!“Yes.” “I still want to do it, kahit it’s not the same man.”Napamulat
TOPHERAGAIN, she responded to the kiss so eagerly, and I groaned between our lips. Anything she did turned me on in a big way. Had I known we’d be in bed together when I was undressing her this afternoon? I had wanted her since then. I missed taking care of someone. I missed loving someone. I missed being in love, and making love with a woman like Jenna who, by her simple smile, could make my heart blossom like a plant long denied of water.And all these—my longing and hunger, I poured out to her. I kissed her deeply, and she gave back to me as hungrily, her tongue sensually playing with my tongue, her body rubbing against mine. I lifted myself from her and she knew. She opened her thighs and I placed myself between them. Ahh, her flesh felt warm to me. I couldn’t wait to take her. I rubbed my meat against her silken flesh and we both moaned. I growled against her skin. Ang sarap niya sa pakiramdam, hindi ko napigil ang aking sarili. I couldn’t stop kissing her but her breasts,
JENNAI WASN’T REALLY SURE how it was to go. I knew my first experience with a guy was sorely lacking – I didn’t cum then. I had to fake it so it would stop and anything else after that just didn’t matter. I was never excited enough. Lalo pang lumala noong mabisto ko ang panloloko.Kahit kay Keith, I couldn’t relax. I couldn’t forget.When Topher carried me to his bed, I was scared to disappoint him. But he kept kissing me and I was so excited like I had never been before, and I certainly knew he wasn’t a conman. Kasi hindi kami.We were basically both just reacting to the sexual tension we definitely feel since this started. When he got rid of his clothes, I couldn’t help but wonder about how good he looked, and how hot he moved. He was so confident and so warm, so sexy, that I could only feel what he was doing to me. The way he checked on me, connected as he kissed me, touched me, and when he went down there I was fascinated with how watchful he was of my every reaction. It was
JENNA I BECAME aware of Topher again after a long moment. He was still thrusting, but slower.“Topher…?” “Sshhh... give me a second to calm down a bit.”“Did you cum?” I asked, feeling ashamed for even not knowing. He still felt hard. Hindi man lang lumambot o lumiit.Umiling siya, pero nakangiti. “Ayokong matapos ito agad,” sabi niya. Saka siya umurong at lumabas.At nakangisi pa rin… bumaba siya roon.And he licked me, happily. It would have looked weird if it didn’t feel so good, and if watching him doing so while he watched me watch him wasn’t such a turn on. The act was so intimate, sandali akong napaisip kung hindi ba sa matagal nang lovers nangyayari ito, nararamdaman ito.Pero ni hindi ko ma-imagine itanong ito sa kanya. I didn’t want him to think that I needed more than this. I didn’t even want to think about this now. Gusto ko lang ma-excite lalo noong nakikita kong gumagapang na siya pabalik.“I’ll make you cum again,” pangako niya.Nakakahiya iyong parang iyak ng antisip
JENNAHE MOVED and I became aware. Not fully awake or right away, pero namalayan ko siya agad. Naging conscious ako agad sa posisyon namin sa pagtulog.It hadn’t changed since I fell asleep. His arms were still around me, my head was laying on one of his upper arm, his other arm was around my waist, and his other thigh was over one of mine, which was securely wedged between his. I was sleeping deeply and it wasn’t even my bed, nasurpresa akong naisip. Pero ni hindi ko nga ito prinoblema kanina bago kami matulog. There were times when I wasn’t comfortable in other beds. Actually, the only other bed that didn’t disturb me from sleeping were houses or any other places where my mother happened to be staying wherever in the world she happened to be at whenever I visited her. Bukod doon, namamahay ako. Kahit sa guestroom sa bahay ng Uncle Markus, hindi ako nakakatulog nang maayos.But I felt so comfortable here. And I was warm in his arms, covered by his naked body. I slept without a c
JENNANOONG BUMAGSAK ako at natunaw sa kanya, pumihit siya sa pagkakahiga hanggang sa nakatihaya na ako sa kanyang tabi, ang mga labi ko ay kulong sa mga labi niya, ang katawan niya ay nakakurba sa akin.Saka siya bumangon at sa sumunod na sandali ay nahila na niya ako, nakaangat na ang mga tuhod ko sa ere, at bumababa ang kanyang ulo sa pagitan ng aking mga hita.Napahingal ako. “Topher!” I thought that was going to be the first time. Nakukuha ko nang gusto niyang gawin iyon, lick me after I cum. And he was tender as he laved my clit with his tongue, sensitive as I was. The first time we made love, the first time he touched me there, he knew how much should be enough. He knew how to touch a woman. Hindi lalayo na alam din niya kung paano gamitin ang kanyang dila. Sa lahat ng bagay, naiiba siya talaga.Napaungol na lang akong parang kuntentong pusa habang patuloy siya sa paglaro at pagdila sa akin, slow movements that calmed me down. Pagkatapos niyon, pumuwesto siya at naramdaman k
TOPHERI WATCHED her as she walked inside the doors to the big hall, my hot and beautiful Christmas gift last night in a sexy and chic off-the-shoulder burgundy dress and high-heeled sexy and strappy stilettos. Jenna’s beauty and elegance made her glow tonight. Nakita ko pa ang pagkatulala sa mukha ni Keith noong pumihit ito at nakita ang babaeng pinaniniwalaan nitong fiancée pa rin nito, since he still didn’t know he’d been fired from that privilege. Kahit ako, hindi ko pa nakita si Jenna na ganito.And I felt proud of her… and of myself, dahil nakikita kong malayong malayo siya sa babaeng iniuwi ko sa bahay kahapon, drunk and defeated.Instead, she bloomed. Like a woman thoroughly loved. I might have helped put that beautiful blush on those cheeks. At gusto kong tumayo at bayuhin ang dibdib ko sa pagmamalaki.Gusto ko lang… nangingiti kong naisip. Jenna had always been pretty, but subtly, because she never deliberately tried to get attention to herself. Sa kabila niyon, napansin
TOPHER HINDI naging madali ang makalapit sa kanya.Paano, hindi lang ako ang nakapansin ng pagbabago niya nang gabing iyon. Hindi lang siya nagpaganda nang husto, naging accommodating din siya sa mga lumapit sa kanya at nakipag-usap.Nakikipagtawanan.Nagpapahawak ng kamay, nagpapahalik sa knuckles sa mga mas mapangahas. Nakikipagsayaw. Sumayaw sila ni Keith, pero nakipagsayaw din siya sa iba bukod kay Tito Markus. Sa paligid ko, naririnig ko ang mga comments na nasurpresa.How lovely she’s always been and it was good to see her so happy and ‘in love’ and that she and Keith were probably going to get engaged soon, if not tonight.Napapailing na lang ako.Not that I cared.Okay, so I did. Only because that simply wasn’t true.Tama?“Chris! I’m glad you came! You want to sit with us?”Nakalampas na ako sa mesa bago ko naintindihan na ako ang tinawag. I wasn’t Chris. It was either I was Christopher or Topher. Why couldn’t they remember this?Pumihit ako at ngingiti sana kay Beryl… i