Chapter 5: “Why Does It Feel Wrong?”

MELVIN'S POV

The glass had been full an hour ago. I hadn't touched it since.

I stood by the fire in my study, pacing across the room before stopping. Then, I sat down, one hand pressed on my forehead and the fire burning low behind me. I couldn't shut off the thought, it kept replaying itself over and over again. 

 My mind drifted to Auren's face when I said the words. The way her knees almost buckled. The way her fingers gripped the air like she was reaching for something solid and finding nothing.

The way she screamed my name like it could pull me back from what I had already done.

It couldn't.

My wolf paced inside me, restless and furious in a way I didn't have the energy to quiet. He hadn't settled since the council hall.

 Every time I pushed him down, he came back harder, clawing at something i had no name for. like he had refused to accept what we had done today regardless of the reason behind it.

"I know…okay?." I said it out loud to an empty room.

He didn't stop pacing.

I leaned forward and pressed both hands flat against the desk, staring at the untouched glass. 

The fire popped. Outside the window, Thornridge was quiet, that silence that settles after something irreversible happens and everyone retreats into their own walls to process it.

I had told myself this was for the pack. I'd told myself it was necessary, that Thornridge needed an heir more than it needed one woman's feelings.

I had told myself a lot of things today, none of them were sitting right inside my chest.

The door opened without a knock.

Selene moved through it like she belonged there, her hair loose around her shoulders, her dress soft and deliberate. 

She carried two fresh glasses and set them on my desk like she had already decided we were past grief and into something worth celebrating.

She sat across from me and folded her hands gently over her bump, it was small, still, barely visible. She looked at me with an expression she had clearly prepared before walking in.

"You've been in here for hours." Her voice was low and careful. "You haven't eaten anything."

"I'm fine, thanks for your concern."

"You're not." She tilted her head. "Melvin, look at me."

I looked up because it was easier than arguing with her.

Her eyes were soft, she had practiced this look, I could see the effort she tried to maintain. 

"You did the right thing today." She said it without her lips trembling. No guilt whatsoever.

"Did I?" The question slipped out of my lips.

"The pack needed this." She reached across the desk, her fingers brushing the back of my hand. "Thornridge needed stability and certainty. You gave them that today. That's what a good Alpha does."

I pulled my hand back, slowly.

"She screamed my name, Selene. Did you hear her scream my name to save her?" My voice stayed low. "When they dragged her out. Did you hear her?"

Something moved behind her eyes, quickly and faded before I could catch up with it. Then the softness slid back into place like a mask settling in.

"She will be okay." Her voice remained steady. "Auren is stronger than people give her credit for."

"That's not what I'm talking about."

"Then what are you talking about?" She rose from the chair slowly and came around the desk, taking every step carefully.

 "That you feel guilty? You're allowed to feel guilty, Melvin. It means you're human. It doesn't mean you were wrong."

She stopped beside me. Her hand came to rest on my shoulder, fingers pressing in like she was trying to reach something underneath the tension locked there.

"You've been carrying this pack alone for years." Her voice dropped, quieter now, meant only for this room. "The elders, the politics, the pressure. All of it." Her thumb moved in a slow circle. "You don't have to carry it alone anymore. That's why I'm here."

I kept my eyes on the fire.

Her hand moved from my shoulder down to my chest, her palm flat, warm and intentional against the fabric.

"Let me be what you need." She leaned in, close enough that I could feel her breath. "She's gone, Melvin. We don't have to keep pretending. We can finally just—"

"Don't!!" 

The word left me quickly but landed hard enough to freeze her where she stood. I yanked her hands off my shoulder.

"Melvin—"

"Don't do that again."

My wolf surged from somewhere so deep it moved through me like a wave I hadn't prepared for, the chair scraped back loud against the stone floor as I stood.

I walked to the window.

Selene straightened behind me. I heard her smooth her dress, heard the shift in her breathing.

"I'm not doing this tonight." I didn't turn around. "I need you to leave."

"You are grieving her." A pause. "That's what this is."

"Selene."

"You rejected her, Melvin." Her voice sharpened slightly, like she was done with her act. "The bond is broken. Whatever you're feeling right now, it's residual. It fades. You should know that."

"Leave." I lowered my gaze to the ground without turning back. “Now!!”

The word landed like a door closing between us. 

She was quiet for a long moment. Long enough that I heard the fire settle, heard the wind press against the window glass. Then her footsteps moved toward the door, controlled, each step deliberate.

At the threshold, she stopped.

She didn't turn around.

"For what it's worth," she said, her voice sliding back to the act, "she didn't even fight them when they pushed her past the eastern gate. She just kept walking."

The fire crackled.

I hadn't moved.

"She walked straight into the Ringwood border without looking back once." 

Her hand rested lightly on the doorframe. "Strange, isn't it? For someone who claimed to love you so much."

I spun around, the door clicked shut behind me.

My wolf went completely still inside me.

The eastern gate? I hadn't told anyone which gate they had used to escort her out.