The ocean is quiet, the smell of the fresh air and the coldness of the wind that makes my heart float from mid-air. The sound of the waves that is splashing on the shore, the warm water from the ocean that gently touched my toes. I stared at the sky to prevent the tears from crawling down to my lashes. " I'm ready Dilan" " phew" I released a heavy sigh " this is it" I stood up and walked slowly near the shore. " hey stop!! Stop" I heard someone shouted, but I don't care at all, right now all I need is to remove all the pain that I am feeling right now, I need to end this suffering, I need to follow him I loved him. " Hey what do you think you are doing, " the man wearing a black polo shirt said as he pulled me back to the shore " I... I want to end this," I said as I cry like a baby " Hey mung, don't do that.. think of your family, friends," he said I don't even know this person and why the heck is he invading my life I stared at him and I was shocked when I saw his face, am I dreaming? Is this real? What the hell? There are things that science can't explain. Is this a blessing from up above? Or did Dilan gave me this man because he knows that I will be lonely without him? I find something interesting, Dilan gave me something to treasure, to love and to trust.
View More" Hey Dilan stop that," I said as I tried to avoid his nose sniffing my neck " it tickles," I said and pushed him
" Good morning love," he said and kissed me on the forehead
Such a sweet man
" Good Morning too," I said and kissed him on the cheek
" Come on down breakfast is ready," he said and stood up from the bed
" Okay I'll just take a very quick shower " I answered and winked at him.
" Okay then" He answered back and winked at me.
Thank you God for giving me a sweet and nice boyfriend, I don't know if I did something great on my past life to receive a special treatment today, I went inside the bathroom and took a quick shower, I stared at the mirror and smile.
After taking a bath I quickly changed my clothes and run down to the dining table
" Hey sit down, let us eat, " Dilan said
Dilan is my 4 months boyfriend and I'm proud of having him, he's not just sweet and caring but he is loyal and huggable, lovable
"Joash Dee, what are you thinking again there," He said while pointing me using his spoon
" None..none lets eat" I shook my head and started putting food on my mouth
I am Joash Dee and I work as a Radio DJ, I have my own segment on the radio where I talked to callers and give them pieces of advice, about love, life friendship and all I'm not bragging myself but I am famous there haha
Dilan Is my co-worker he works as the sound technician, he fixes the chords, the right sounds, music for every episode that I'm doing.
"Faster we might get late on duty," Dilan said
I didn't notice that I was drowned on my thoughts, after eating I went back to our room to change clothes
Today is a new day for us.
" Good morning" the guard greeted us
" Morning too brother," I said
As I arrived my booth, I immediately sat down and test my tools and equipment, after making sure that I'm all set, I give a thumbs-up sign to my team as a sign to start the radio rolling
Ringing
Here's our first caller
" Hi, good morning caller may I know your name?" I said happily
I heard that the caller cleared her throat before speaking
"Hi. DJ Dee my name is Larissa and I want to ask for your advice" she started
" yes dear what's that," I said
" here. uhhmm how do I start this.. " she said
" You can start from the top dear.. breath in and breath out so that you can compose yourself " I advised her
" well. DJ .. it all started when we are just high school student we are just 18 years old back then, but that time I know myself that I loved him and so he does" she started
"And?"
" We stayed for almost 4 years when we knew that he has cancer, leukaemia stage 4 cancer"
We all stayed quite listening to the caller. She started crying too
" I loved him.. he told me to forget each other, he said that I am still young, I can still find someone better than him, which I know myself I can never do and I won't do it, I stayed on his side, every day, every night until last week, the last week we had, the last time I saw his smile, the last time he held my hands, the last time we exchanged I love you to each other, he left me already, he joined God above already, how am I going to move on, how am going to forget the one I love? Can you give me pieces of advice?" She begged
I know how hurt she is right now, I know the feeling of being left behind, I know it hurts so bad that you ever wanted to end your own life
" Larissa? Take this in mind, everyone deserves happiness including you, you deserve to be happy, cry it all out now, cry all those pains today but make sure that tomorrow you will stand tall and high, yes, he left you but that doesn't mean that you will be left alone right? You still have your friends, families to help you stand again, and there, we have God to pray and ask for strength, remember that you will be hurt today but you will go through this tomorrow, it will take a month a year to move on but it's fine, as long as you know yourself that you are happy it is fine, right now you are pierced with millions or even billions of needles and no one will help you remove it except yourself, remove it one at a time and I assure you that after you remove all needles you will feel that the burden inside you slowly fades away. God loves you, your friends and family love you. Take their hands with you. "
" Thank you, Dee," she said while sobbing
" Okay Larissa take this moment and say everything that you wanted to say to your boyfriend," I said
" Hi Ben, baby, thank you, thank you for staying at my side for 4 years, I love you, I know you are happy now, I know you are in a good place, the memories we had will always be inside my heart, we will see each other soon"
" Now Larissa breath in and breath out, pray and let God help you through it okay," I said
" Thank you, Dee, thank you for helping me. I'll end now this call" she said and ended the call.
Dilan played a sad song that caused me to have teary eyes
" Hey, are you okay?" He said and sat next to me
" yes I am fine, I was just carried away by the caller, I feel so sad for her, you baby what will you do if I died instantly?" I suddenly asked him
" Me.. hmmm I don't know, and I'm sure that won't happen right," he said and pinched my cheek
" And what if I die instantly what will you do?" He suddenly throws the question back to
" Me?"
What will I do if he dies instantly? Will I cry? Will I end my life too?
" Hey don't be too serious I was just joking," he said and shuffled my hair.
"Tch," I said and glared at him
But really what will I do if he left me instantly?
No.. no. Erase .. erase. I shook my head and closed my eyes.. what the hell am I thinking about.
I guess when that time comes I will accept it wholeheartedly, with a smile on my face.
JoashI went to Dylan's grave and everything was worth it. I know heaven is a beautiful place because they've got youWhen someone makes you the happiest person and the saddest person at the same time, that’s when it’s real. That’s when it’s worth something.You made me the happiest and saddest person in this world when you came into my life and brought me smiles and happiness but everything changed when you suddenly left me. It's been 2years 1month and 27days since you left me. How am I going to explain the feelings I have experienced since he left me? How am I going to face this cruel world when my best friend, best buddy and m
As I went out of the bathroom, the smell of the food that Joash was cooking welcomed me.I smiled stupidly imagining my life with him."YAH, neo geogi usgo meongcheong hae?" He shouted.I did not understand what he just said. I just smiled and walked near him."The only Korean word that I know is SARANGHAE, so I'll take those words as I love you too, okay?" I said and laughed.He smiled and went out."Faster let's eat, cause later I will eat something," He said and winked.I laughed, now I can see his naughty side.I went down to the dining area and the food was already prepared.I sat down and stared to my baby, he was just standing in front of me, smiling."What now? Let's eat," I said."Go, I'll just watch you,""Why? Are you not hungry?""I am, but seeing you makes me full already,""Nah, that's too much sweet, baby," I said and stood in front of him."What was th
JordanI woke up only wearing my boxer shorts, I tried to move but my head is still aching, I touched the bed and saw Amanda lying down beside me."Fuck, what happened?" I asked and stood up." We had fun last night, the way you moan, it feels like you were longing for this for so many years, I still love how you kiss me back, your lips are still that soft, your body is still looking for mine," Amanda said as she stood up, she was only wearing her underwear."Dress up," I shouted and throw her clothes to her." Why? You don't like me seeing naked?" She asked as she crawled going in my direction. "Another round?" She added."No, Amanda, we are over, what happened to us last night is just a mistake, you drugged me, you all played me, I never thought that you can do this to me," I said and took my clothes from the floor."Hey, Jordan, wait, I
Joash povAfter every storm, there is still hopeAfter every rain, there is always a rainbow.After every suffering comes relief.Maybe it's not always about trying to fix something broken. Maybe it's about starting over and creating something better.I'm starting over again. We are on process having a fresh restart.A new pattern of thoughtsNew emotionsA new connection to the worldA new belief system in myselfIn my life and my family.After the shift, I decided to walk in the park. I've had experienced so many bad things these past days and I needed to unwind.I was walking when I guy suddenly appeared in front of me. I was just staring at him while he was busy talking to his phone. HIis smil is very perfect." Who was that? And what are you doing
I woke up very happy today different from other daysAfter I took a bath, I quickly ran down to the kitchen to cook and prepare foods for the two of usI heard a voice coming from the master's room, as I looked back I saw Joash yawning and rubbing his tummy"Good morning," I said and waved" Aww your preparing foods, here let me give you a hand" he offered a hand to help meHe was slicing the meat when he asked me a question" Jordan, what happened last night?" He suddenly asked me and smirked"Huh?, nothing," I answered, I tried my best not to look obvious, I need to help him forget everything that had happened yesterday.My face is burning and I can feel that it is turning red so I quickly looked on the other side"Are you sure? Why are you trembling?" He added" Can you hand me the radish?" He sai
JoashI saw my reflection sitting and huddled in the corner wiping the tears on my eyes.Nobody knows the real me. Nobody knows how many times I've cried in my room when nobody was watching. Nobody knows how many times I've lost hope, how many times I've been let down. Nobody knows how many times I've left like I'm about to snap, but I just don't, for the sake of others. Nobody knows the thoughts that go through my head when I'm sad, how horrible they truly are. Nobody. Knows. Me.I saw how messy I am on that picture until a hand came and offer me to stand up."Baby I will be by your side, I will stay by your side, I will be with you forever, I love you and I will always love you"Who was that?The sad face I once had become like a flower that blooms."You are safe with me I promise. And when you get scared: look me in the eyes,
" Let's go to church," Joash said" Okay" I answeredIt took us 30 minutes to walk from the cemetery to the church, we kneeled and took the moments to pray and ask for forgiveness
I woke up from the sun coming from the window. I squint my eyes and saw Joash preparing coffee."You're awake now?" He asked."Here drink this one," He handed me the coffee. He sat next to me."Thank you, Jordan, I know you have so many things to do but you stayed on my side, I don't know how to repay your kindness. Tell me what you need I will give it, as long as I can, I will repay you." He saidI smiled at him and pressed his hands."You don't need to do that, helping you is enough for me, seeing you smile is enough for me," I answered."Dylan and you are the same, both cheesy and sweet," He said and smiled.I saw happiness through his eyes." Let's visit my brother later? "I asked. I saw how his face gloomed." For real? I can't wait, "He answered." Okay take a bath now, "I said.He hurriedly went inside the bathroom and took a bath, I brought the clothes that my sister brought kast night. Maybe
"Where are you?" I texted Amanda, I need to see her today to tell her that we postpone our date, Joash needs me more." I'm here, look at your back" She replied.I was shocked when she kissed me after I turned my head, "What are you doing?" I asked and gently pushed her."Surprise," She said happily. She walked back and sat beside me." How are you?"I asked"I'm fine" she answered"How about you?""I'm fine as well, Amanda, can we postpone our celebration? I need to hurry and go home, my sister is sick" I lied."What?" She shouted "this is important to me, I even prepared my body for you," She said and moved closer to me, she even rubbed his breast on my arm."What are you doing?" I narrow my brows" I missed you, babe, come to my house, I prepared everything, for you, for us""No Amanda, my sister needs me today, I came to see you just to tell you that," I said
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