Chapter 3 – A cold realisation.

Ame POV

My heart is broken as I look at the nursery I lovingly designed for my baby. All perfectly prepared, every item waiting to be used.

The toys that were waiting to be loved, the cot waiting to be slept in….the teddy I bought the moment it was confirmed we were having a boy.

A black wolf dressed in a blue jumper, a black furred wolf just like his daddy…just waiting to be cuddled.

I can’t believe this is really happening…I can’t believe their words. It seems like it is happening to somebody else, not to me.

I had wanted to impress Calian, so that when he did return to me, I didn’t need to add more to his workload. I wanted him to enjoy the countdown.

Now everything seems so pointless, all that planning, all that excitement for what…

“You need to eat something.” A maid enters the bedroom, placing a tray of food to my side, if only she knew eating was the furthest thing on my mind right now.

“I’m not hungry.” I push it away, turning my face away from her. I just wanted to be left alone.

“You need to at least try something Luna; you are still healing.”

I’m not hungry, my body just feels numb. Even something as simple as breathing hurts, it aches having to remind myself to breathe in and out.

I don’t want to do anything; I can’t bring myself to even leave this room. My eyes couldn’t tear themselves away from the nursery that I had lovingly prepared.

I knew as soon as I left this room Calian would order for the items to be removed.

I would return to find it stripped, as if my baby never existed. I wasn’t ready, in my mind I was certain my child still lived.

I could still feel him.

“Do you know where they put my baby?” Perhaps seeing some kind of grave with my own eyes would make me accept this.

Make me realise that this feeling was grief, that I was clinging on to a future that would now not be.

“No Luna, I’m sorry I have no idea.”

“What about Lacey, can you tell her to come to me.”

“I…Lacey was banished miss.”

“Banished? What for?” I shift my body for the first time in hours, her words surprising me.

“Alpha gave her strict instructions to look after you.”

This wasn’t Lacey’s fault, how could he banish her. She had been by my side from the day he left for the war, for the entire pregnancy…how could he send her away.

“Did she say where she went, you must know?” How could she leave me, at a time like this, without even saying goodbye.

“I don’t Luna, all contact has been forbidden.”

“Forbidden?”

“By the Alpha.”

“I see.” I mutter out, pulling my knees to my chest as I remain sat on the floor, resting against the doorway to the nursery.

“You must keep your strength my lady, especially with the rumours…”

“Rumours, what rumours?” I look up to her as she captures my interest.

“That Dessa is to replace you as Luna. That the child she shares with the Alpha will be announced as the new heir.”

What rumours are these, how could anyone spread such lies. Such cold lies.

“Where is the Alpha?”

“Erm…” Her hesitation speaks volumes to me; she doesn’t want to tell me where he is. But I already know.

“It’s okay, you can tell me. ” I’m already feeling broken, what else she has to say won’t touch the surface.

“I believe the Alpha is with his mate and the baby.”

“Here?”

“No, he put her in a pack house, but…”

“You think it is only a matter of time. ”

“Yes Luna.”

She leaves me, taking the tray of food away with her. I won’t touch it; I have no appetite. It will only go to waste on me.

My head rests against the doorframe, my eyes in a daze as they glare off into the nursery, trying to capture the memories of the hopes and dreams I had for our child. For us.

I’ve not seen Calian since I forced him out of the hospital room, any attempts he has made to visit me I have refused.

I can’t look at him without being reminded of what our child might have looked like.

A child he has seen but continues to ban me from doing so. I just want to see my son’s face….the colour of his hair, of his eyes….just a small glimpse. That’s all I need, but he continues to refuse me.

He didn’t let me say goodbye…

I’ve replayed the incident again and again in my mind, turning myself mad. I needed space to think it over; to let the flashbacks repeat uninterrupted…she had pushed me.

For that I am certain.

She had pulled me off that stage with her, and for that I hate her. She has killed my child and now I learn he hasn’t left her side.

There is a sudden need in me, an urge that I do not understand until I find myself moving down the steps of the alpha house, out through the front door.

There was only one vacant pack house left in the grounds, and without a doubt in my mind, I knew he had put her there.

By the time I approach the small pack house it is too late to turn back, I must see for myself.

I move to the downstairs window, looking in on their new world together…with a sleeping baby in her arms.

My husband bending down behind the back of the sofa, his face resting against hers as they both stare lovingly on their sleeping baby.

The perfect little family…the family destined by the moon goddess herself.

There’s a moment shared between them when they both giggle at the baby’s arm that shoots upwards, Calian holding onto the little chubby arm….a gentle side to my husband shared with Dessa that I rarely saw.

As I watch him place the baby’s arm back inside of his cozy looking blanket my thoughts go to my own child, the scene before me forever burnt into my memory.

A fire was lit, the warmth from the flames making their faces glow whereas I stand outside in the freezing air, my body beginning to shiver as my blood runs cold.

My hands clench painfully at my side, the scent of blood perfuming the air around me. I had cut into my own skin, but I didn’t care, the pain was reminding me that this was real, that my growing hatred was real.

She had done this to me; she had taken my child from me…and now my husband.

“Luna?” The maid from earlier calls out to me, my eyes shooting to the side as she stands with a hamper basket in her arms, clearing delivering to this house.

Her call alerts Calian and Dessa to my presence, I watch as she cradles her baby closer to her, her eyes narrowing at me.

Something is whispered between them, her heated glare remains on me until Calian closes the curtains, blocking my view of her. Of their perfect scene.

He appears outside, reaching for me but I snatch my body away, not wanting him to touch me.

Not when he had just touched her.

“You are cold…you should be at the alpha house recovering.”

“Where is my child?”

He pauses, looking at the maid behind him, then to his mate and other baby through the front door. His hand reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose as he deeply sighs out.

“I can’t keep doing this Ame, you know what fate befell upon our child. ”

“If you don’t tell me, then I will search this pack high and low…every part of soil upturned until I find my child.” My fists grip tighter, the blood now dripping down onto the ground beneath me, my body tensing with anger.

“Perhaps you need more help than I thought.”

“Have you forgotten your vowels to me Alpha?” A delirious cold laugh escapes me.

“Of course not.”

“I don’t need my fated mate…those were your exact words. You assured me that she meant nothing to you. Do I mean nothing to you now, and our child?”

“That’s fucking unfair…” He growls out to me, an anger registering on his face that I haven’t seen in a long time. His eyes bleeding out into onyx black, his aura a warning.

“We are done…” I order out.

“Ame…” He tries to speak but I cut him off.

“I want a divorce! My rejection ceremony will be in two days!”