Mag-log inASHER
He’s obsessed with me. I thought to myself as I caught Elliot Rourke glaring at me for the hundredth time. He was seated with his friends in the cafeteria, a few tables ahead of me. His friends were laughing and talking all around him and yet, his attention was solely on me. I doubt he had even touched his food. At this point, it might as well have been there for decoration. So damn obsessed. He looked as he always did when he stared— messy blond hair falling into his brown eyes, lips pressed together, left leg bouncing beneath the table, fingers clenched around a plastic fork like he might snap it in half. I had never thought that being hated could feel so heady. But that was exactly what being hated by Elliot Rourke made me feel. I could not explain why it did. If anything, it should’ve made me angry. Made me dislike Elliot in return. But it didn’t. I had always been a good child. The perfect one. The one everybody loved. The one who was good at sports, at academics, at making friends, at anything you could name. I was popular. Everybody loved me. Yet, for some reason, Elliot didn’t feel the same as everyone else. It fascinated me. From the very moment he had set eyes on me, before I could even say a word, Elliot had decided I was going to be his worst enemy. He was angry. Angry at me, at his dad, at the world, at the fact that I existed in the same space as him. At first, I thought he resented me because he viewed me as a ‘replacement’ for his family but I was beginning to realize it was deeper than that. I met his gaze and waved. He rolled his eyes and finally averted his gaze, turning to speak to his friends. I did not know what to make of this pointless ‘rivalry’ between us. And yes, it was pointless because it was entirely one-sided. For the past six months now, Elliot has done everything to antagonize me. He had put glue in my toothpaste, intentionally left suds on the bathroom wall (because he knew how much it drove me crazy), put spice and salt in my drink, made snide passing comments about how robotic I was, broke my laptop by ‘mistake’ and the list went on. One time, he even peed in my shampoo. It was weird and quite frankly, childish. Everyone was starting to notice too, but that didn’t deter Elliot. We’ve been doing this dance for way longer than necessary but quite frankly, I wasn’t tired of it yet— I didn’t think I’d ever be. “Hey, babe,” a soft voice said beside me. A wet kiss on my cheek followed as Sofia, my girlfriend, took the space beside me on the long chair. Balanced perfectly on her hands was a tray containing grilled chicken breast, steamed broccoli, salad and yoghurt. She placed the tray on the table and tossed her long, dark hair over her shoulder, the motion causing the scent of her strawberry mixed with lavender shampoo to linger in the air. With her gray eyes, a graceful nose, and pouty, red lips, Sofia was insanely pretty. Which meant she was perfect for me. Perfect for the role I’d crafted for myself. “Your stepbrother is staring at you again,” she said as she wrapped her lips around a straw. Her gaze was on a distant table in front of us. Where my darling stepbrother was sitting. “He looks like he wants to kill you.” I looked up and surely enough, Elliot was staring at me like he was already imagining me six feet under. I winked at him. He pulled a disgusted face and looked away. It worked every time. The key to winning our little battles was to act unruffled. It pissed him off even more. Sofia sighed beside me. “If only he didn’t scowl so much all the time, he would be so hot. Something about his messy hair just does it for me. It’s so… sexy.” I shot her a look. She had her chin in her hand, a dreamy expression on her face as she stared at Elliot. Something hot unfurled in my stomach. I wasn’t sure what to make of it. Sofia laughed when she caught my look and curled her hands around my bicep. “Oh babe. You look like you want to murder someone. I’m just joking.” Somehow, I didn’t think she was. “Excuse me if I don’t find you calling my stepbrother hot funny.” She rolled her eyes. “I might be dating you but I have eyes too, you know. I can’t turn them off.” She planted a fat kiss on my cheek. I didn’t have to check to know I probably had a lipstick stain on the right side of my cheek. I forced out a smile to reassure her. She wrapped her arms around my neck. “Don’t worry, I’m still yours. You don’t have to be jealous.” Yeah. The problem was I wasn’t sure it was her I was feeling jealous over. “You look exhausted,” Sofia said as she released me, now focused on taking a bite of her chicken. “I had an early lecture,” I replied, shrugging. “And a late night.” She raised an eyebrow. “Studying?” I smirked faintly. “Always.” She laughed, unconvinced but willing to let it go. Sofia was like that—warm, easy, content to take people at face value. It was one of the things that made being with her… comfortable. I took a bite of my sandwich, then felt it. The unmistakable sensation of being watched. I looked up and our eyes met. He didn’t look away. His glare felt almost like a challenge. The corner of my mouth twitched before I could stop it. Sofia’s voice drew my attention back to her, her knee brushing mine under the table. “So,” she said in a sing-song voice, “there’s a party this weekend. Friday night.” “Yeah?” “Yeah. Hayden’s throwing it. Off-campus. Everyone’s going.” I considered that for a moment longer than necessary. It was on the tip of my tongue to say no. I didn’t feel like partying this weekend. I wasn’t even fully recovered from the last one. But everyone had a role to play. Including me. “Are you coming?” Sofia asked, tilting her head. “You always say you might and then you don’t come. And when you do come, you’re nowhere to be found minutes later. You just… disappear.” “I don’t ‘disappear’,” I corrected mildly. “I just… leave.” She rolled her eyes. “Same thing.” I glanced across the cafeteria again, just briefly this time. Elliot was still watching me. “Maybe,” I said. “Depends.” “On what?” “On my mood.” Sofia reached across the table to lace her fingers through mine. Her touch was warm, grounding. In front of me, I watched as Elliot’s jaw tightened. A strange sense of satisfaction ran through me. “Come with me,” Sofia said. “Please. I don’t want to spend the whole night explaining to people that yes, I do have a boyfriend, and no, he’s not imaginary.” I huffed a quiet laugh. “Fine. I’ll come.” Her face lit up. “Really?” “Really.” She squeezed my hand once more before letting go. “Good. I’ll text you the details.” As she turned back to her food, I looked up again. Elliot was staring openly now, fury etched into every line of his face. There was something reckless in his eyes, something that looked dangerous. I held his gaze. Didn’t look away. Just watched him right back. Whatever game he thought he was playing, he was already involved far deeper than he realized. And soon, it was going to be impossible to ignore. I was already anticipating that moment. The moment when the tension between us would finally snap. One way or another.ELLIOT“Elliot, we’re going to be late.” Asher’s voice came from the living room.“I’ll be right there,” I called back.I smoothed down my shirt, tucking the front more firmly into my jeans as I checked myself out in the mirror.I looked good, if I dared to say that myself. Not that it mattered, since it wasn’t like I was going to a fancy party.We were just going to have dinner with our parents.But I didn’t care. I believed you had to look good regardless of the situation. Yeah, I’d been hanging out too much with Sebastian these days. He really wasn’t that bad once you got to know him.I didn’t want to jinx it, but everything was going nicely.Our friends were as supportive as ever, our relationship was going great, we’d finally rented an apartment of our own after pooling our savings together.Our apartment wasn’t huge. It was small and slightly overpriced and the plumbing made concerning noises whenever someone showered too long. But it was ours, and that was all that mattered.As
ASHER“When I walked in on you both that day, all I could think was that my family was falling apart. Again.” She took in a shaky breath. “I panicked.”“I know.”“And then everything spiraled so quickly after that,” she went on. “Suddenly Simon was angry and kicked Elliot out of the house, then you moved out…”“Mum—”“No, let me finish.”I immediately fell silent.“I kept asking myself where I went wrong,” she admitted quietly. “I kept thinking maybe I failed somehow as a mother.”An ache blossomed in my chest.“You didn’t fail.”Her eyes met mine finally.“Then why does it feel like I’ve lost my son?”The pain in her voice nearly broke me.I set the cup down immediately and turned toward her fully.“You’ve not lost me.”“It feels like I have,” she whispered. “You stopped looking at me the same way. And when you left the house…” her voice cracked, “…it felt unbearable.”Guilt hit me so hard I almost felt sick.“I’m sorry,” I said immediately. “I never wanted to hurt you.”She shook he
ASHERI stayed in the waiting room, long after Elliot was gone.I had one ear tuned in for any sounds of shouting or fighting or breaking things coming from Simon’s room. So far, there has been none. Not even Elliot storming out of Simon’s room as I feared has happened yet.Which meant everything was going well.Right?They were both stubborn people so I didn’t know how productive the conversation was going to be or how well it was going to go. I just had to hope that a miracle had happened.I stared at the ugly painting on the wall, the same one I’d been staring at for the past twenty minutes, as I waited for Elliot to come out.I winced as I rotated my neck from side to side. I felt like shit. I probably smelled like one too. Everywhere hurt.I definitely needed to head home for a little while for a shower and a change of clothes but I couldn’t leave Elliot alone just yet. Not before I knew the outcome of his conversation with his father.I rubbed tiredly at my eyes and leaned back
ELLIOTHis bloodshot eyes snapped to mine.My throat tightened. “When I said I wished you were dead… I didn’t mean it. I was just so angry, because it felt like you didn’t care. That you didn’t care that Mum and Daniel were gone. That you didn’t care if I lived or died—”“I do care,” he cut in gently, his voice raw. “I care so much. Much more than you could ever imagine.”I ran a hand through my hair, frustrated. “But I never got that from you. You were so carefree after they died. It was like they weren’t that important to you. It took you only months to start dating again.”His gaze dropped down, like he was ashamed. “I was hurting really badly. I felt so… lonely. I just needed company. I agree that wasn’t probably the best thing to do at that moment but…” He exhaled shakily. “I just needed someone. I needed to feel something other than grief.”“I was right there.” My voice cracked slightly. “Just like you, I was lonely too. I needed someone too. More than anyone, I needed my fathe
ELLIOTI barely slept.Not that I expected anything different.Hospitals weren’t exactly designed for rest. Between the constant beeping of machines, the squeaking shoes against polished floors and the nurses walking in and out of rooms at ungodly hours, sleep felt impossible.But even without all that, I still wouldn’t have slept.My mind refused to shut off.Every time I closed my eyes, I kept replaying the image of Dad lying in that hospital bed.Then my brain would immediately follow it up with the last thing I said to him.By morning, I felt sick with exhaustion.Asher was asleep beside me in one of the uncomfortable waiting room chairs, his head tilted awkwardly against the wall.I stared at him for a moment.His brows remained furrowed even while asleep.Warmth settled deeply in my chest.He stayed the entire night with me despite his own issues with hospitals.Because of me.I rubbed tiredly at my face before quietly standing up.The movement must’ve disturbed him because his
ELLIOTThe relief that hit me was so overwhelming it almost made me dizzy.I hadn’t even realized how terrified I’d been until that moment.My legs carried me closer to the bed automatically.Dad remained asleep, his breathing slow and even beneath the oxygen cannula resting beneath his nose.I let out a short breath.A laugh almost escaped me then. It wasn’t because anything was remotely funny, but because all I could think was I’d been so happy to see my Dad before.What did it say that the happiest I felt seeing my dad was when he was lying in a hospital bed fighting for his life?I stared at him for a long moment.Despite everything that had occurred between us, all I felt right then was sharp, almost painful relief.I swallowed hard.“I’ll… wait outside,” I murmured quietly.Neither Margaret nor Asher stopped me.I stepped out into the hallway quickly before the pressure in my chest exploded.The room suddenly felt too small, too suffocating. Everything felt unbearable.I didn’t
ELLIOTElsa rolled her eyes. “Seriously, who came up with that stupid rule in the first place? And why the hell did we agree to it?”Lucas shoved her lightly. “Hey, watch it. That was me. And in my defense, I was drunk. I just wanted to have fun. It’s you guys’ fault for listening to me and taking
ELLIOTNews kind of travelled faster than I imagined.But then again, it was campus and people tended to be bored. They thrived on gossip.And what was juicier than stepbrothers dating?Asher and I had become the topic of attention. They didn’t know the true facts of our relationship, they only kne
ASHERSimon froze. Like he couldn’t believe I was defending Elliot.Slowly, his eyes shifted to me.“What?”I met his gaze and didn’t look away.“I don’t think your assessment of Elliot is fair,” I repeated, firmer this time.Simon’s brows furrowed. “Excuse me?”“You’re talking about him like he ju
ASHERElsa studied me like she was trying to peel me apart layer by layer.Houston still looked a little dazed. “I didn’t even know you liked guys.”Lucas snorted. “Neither did I.”“If you’d like to know,” I interrupted, “I like a little bit of everything. Gender is irrelevant.”That pulled a small







