Bowl of Rice
Before my abortion, my best friend asked, "You're pregnant with Zeke's baby. Why do you suddenly want to break up with him?"
I handed her my phone. "Because of one message."
The conversation was still open to the text I had sent around noon. I included a picture of my lunch and complained about how terrible the takeout was.
Four hours later, Zeke Evans replied with two simple words.
[I see.]
But when I checked social media, I saw that he liked a picture of Hailey Moore's lunch and commented, [Takeout isn't good for you. I'll cook for you from now on, like I did today.]
Underneath, the two of them exchanged more than a dozen pointless comments, chatting as though they never ran out of things to say to each other.
I stared at the post for a long time before deleting the message I had started typing, asking what he'd had for lunch.
Then I scrolled back through our old conversations.
For seven years, I shared every little detail of my life with Zeke: flowers I passed on the street, weeds pushing through cracks in the sidewalk, the stray cat that hung around outside my building.
In the beginning, he was just as excited to tell me about his day. Over time, his replies dwindled into distracted, simple answers.
It started when Hailey came back.
When you love someone, you want to share your life with them. Everything Zeke stopped telling me, he was now telling her.
"Ruby, they're ready for you."
The nurse was calling my name.
I looked out the window at the evening sky, then got up and followed her.
The sunset was beautiful that day, but for the first time, I had no desire to take a picture and send it to Zeke.