Adult Jokes Clean

“When can I see you again?” She pried, summoning her last drop of courage. “Next time” He replied, biting his lower lips to prevent himself from blushing. “When is the next time?” She continued. He grinned, but remained mum. Six years later, she still could never forget the image of his endearing figure standing before her when she was barely twelve years old, with his handsome face that shone brightly like the fierce sun. Eighteen year old Ariadne, got admission into Leyland university in a different city to pursue a life of her dreams; to get closer to Denver, as close as possible. She just wanted to present herself and make him see her in a new light; an adult as against the little girl in his memory. All she ever wanted is to gently walk into his heart and occupy it. Can such a simple wish come so easy?

The newly-appointed leader, Eileen Shaffer, fantasizes herself as a queen. Because of that, she treats me like her personal maid. On her first day at work, Eileen sends me a list consisting of 16 workplace rules. Not only does she request that I prepare warm water that must be proven to be 113 degrees Fahrenheit by a thermometer every day, but she also wants me to prepare three meals per day for her. I'm not allowed to order takeout. Those meals must be cooked and prepared by me so that the food is safe and clean to eat. Finally, shit hits the fan at the Thanksgiving holidays. Eileen has the nerve to call me 18 times at 2:00 am just so I can leave a like on her son's video. Unable to tolerate her antics anymore, I slap her on the spot. "I'm the daughter of this company's CEO, and yet I have to slave away at work every day! Do you seriously think you're an actual queen now?"

On my fifth birthday, my parents showed up at my birthday party later than usual. They brought with them a skinny little girl who couldn't seem to speak at all. I rushed over, hoping to hug Mom, only to get knocked down by her. That was how I fell into the ten-foot cake that my parents had specifically picked out for me. Buttercream filled my nose and mouth, suffocating me to no end. When I managed to climb out of the mess, I burst out in tears and asked Dad to cuddle me. But Dad retracted his hands while looking conflicted. "Don't blame your mom, Willow. From now on, you must take good care of Maple, your little sister. As long as Maple is happy, your mom will be happy." Later on, the mean kids in the neighborhood shove Maple Thompson, my new little sister, into a pile of sand. I rush over to protect her immediately. Once we get home, I mimic my parents by drawing a bath so that I can clean Maple up. That's when Mom suddenly barge into the bathroom and slap me heavily across the face. "You've already enjoyed our love for the past five years! Why are you still greedy for more? I can't believe you're trying to drown Maple right now!" Mom's eyes have gone bloodshot. She drags me by the hair and stuffs me into the washing machine. "Only a washing machine is capable of cleanse that filth out of your soul! You can only scramble out of the washing machine and apologize to Maple once you've decided to quit bullying your sister!" In the living room, Dad lowers his voice. "Keep your voice down when you're chewing Willow out. Maple is about to fall asleep. Don't go around waking her up now." Mom doesn't want to look at me anymore. Instead, she slams the lid onto the washing machine forcefully. I can't get out of the machine. What she doesn't know is that the washing machine will activate. "The 212-degree-Fahrenheit wash cycle has been activated." Scalding hot water is soon dumped onto my body. It hurts so much that I gradually lose my consciousness. Will Mom love me again once I'm squeaky clean after the wash cycle?

You might wonder what the bait is all about? Yeah. Life, itself, is a dirty game. Like a pass card, just to achieve the impossible at the expense of others. Here comes a clean but dirty game played amongst three. Each wants to be crowned the dirtiest and master of the game... Hardie Morrison, a drug addict and a drug Lord too. Involved in a play of lose or win, he lost his beloved and he's bent on revenge. Arlington Grayson, a young and promising lady who's just after what life decided to offer. Everyone seeks for happiness and yes, that's one of Arlington's wish everyday. What happens when Arlington met with Hardin, fell head over heels with him but all Hardie wants was just to used her for his benefit and disposed her off like a trash. Love, they say, melts a hardened heart and it sometimes heals a broken heart too. But what if reverse is the case here? What if Arlington was just the wrong bait? What if...? What if...?

During the height of the plague, Elizabeth is known for touching the dying without fear and for surviving longer than anyone should. The village calls her witch. Death calls her interesting. Malachor is a demon bound to plague and passing souls, ancient and cruel, intrigued by a healer who refuses to beg. When Elizabeth is condemned, thrown into a plague pit, and left to die, she calls out, not to God, but to the darkness watching her. He answers. Bound to a demon of death, Elizabeth survives… and is slowly claimed. Desire becomes devotion. Mercy becomes sin. A dark historical fantasy romance of plague, power, and forbidden surrender where love corrupts, salvation fails, and Hell is the only vow kept. TRIGGER/CONTENT WARNING: This story contains mature themes and content intended for adult audiences (18+) Reader discretion is advised. It includes moments of violence, coercion and domination themes, sexual content and dark erotic elements, emotional trauma and moral corruption, blasphemous themes involving demons, faith, and damnation

When I was three and a half, the system sent me back to my dad's high school days. The good news—the brooding villain destined to destroy the world was still just a blond guy. The bad news—there were way too many blond guys at that school, and I could not tell them apart. Hence, every time I saw one, I called him 'Dad'. By the time I got to the 101st, I was robbed. He grabbed me by the collar with a fierce look on his face, like he was about to hit me at any second. The long-dormant system suddenly spoke up, "Kiddo, the one walking out of the school right now is your dad!" I sniffled and shouted, "Hey, you'd better be careful! I'm telling you, my dad's almost an adult! Right, Dad? Elliot!" Elliot Smith froze for a second and pointed at himself. "Who, me?"

Behind velvet curtains and gilded balconies, the opera is more than a performance. It's a hunting ground, a court of monsters disguised as patrons and benefactors. When a masked nobleman claims her talent as his own, Lyria is drawn into a world where music is power, restraint is survival, and desire is the most dangerous temptation of all. The longer Lyria remains under his protection, the more she awakens. Her body responds to hungers she does not yet understand and her are dreams invaded by a silver-eyed predator who promises freedom instead of restraint. As the opera's beauty curdles into something predatory, Lyria must decide what she is willing to become to survive it. The stage is watching. The city is listening. And once the blood sings, it cannot be silenced. TRIGGER/CONTENT WARNING: This story contains mature themes and content intended for adult audiences (18+) Reader discretion is advised. It includes moments of violence, sexual content and dark erotic elements, manipulation, obsession, and emotional power dynamics.

"Rule 1! I don't want to see your filthy hands on my kids, make sure you are clean before touching them." "Rule Two! I don't want you close to me. People like you are nothing but gold diggers." Those were the rules Lucas Maxwell, the renowned billionaire gave to Scarlett Barnes before she was finally accepted into the big mansion as a nanny. She had long dreamed of a high-paying job to foot her bills, and she finally got one. Without considering the terror she would face from Lucas, being the father of the kids she bonded with. Scarlett thought it was the beginning of a new life, without realizing it was another phase of woes for her. Fortunately, an opportunity came and she got into a contract marriage with Lucas, she gradually falls in love with him, but then secrets are revealed. Would she be able to stick with Lucas even after discovering his secrets? What happens when she herself discovers her true identity?

Over five years of her marriage, Kylie never experienced love from Liam. She would only cook, clean, and satisfy him sexually. Liam was head over heels for Aurora, his ex-lover, which made Kylie serve him a divorce. She finally pursued her fashion career and found favour in the eyes of the CEO of the Yamah’s Group. Liam, on his quest to get approval from the Yamah’s Group, found out that his ex-wife was the lead fashionista and that her new lover was the CEO of the company. Liam could not stand the heartbreak, so he called her, claiming to sort things out with her, but instead, he lured her into having sex with him on her contract-signing day for the Yamah’s Group. She was given two options: to sign the contract and get exposed, or follow her ex-husband home as his lawfully wedded wife. Not only was she going to lose Yamah, she was putting herself back into the mess she once escaped from.

Fantine Lennox was trained to kill targets, Not fall in love with one. When she’s sent undercover as a PR officer for the elite Hades hockey team, her mission is simple: get close to the soon to be Alpha King, Riley Porter, and end his life. One clean kill, one final step toward revenge for her mother’s death. But the moment their eyes meet, everything changes. Because Riley isn’t just her target, he’s her fated mate. Now every look burns, every touch tempts, and every heartbeat betrays her secret. Riley can feel the bond pulling them together, but Fantine fights it with everything she has. Loving him means betraying her father. Killing him means destroying her soul. As enemies close in, dark secrets unravel, the kind that could shatter kingdoms and rewrite bloodlines. Fantine must decide: will she fulfill her deadly mission… or surrender to the mate who was never meant to be hers?