Before I Let Go Novels & Stories

“I’m not trying to make your life difficult. I just need you to know that I’m not going away. Not this time.” The train doors opened. I got on. I did not delete the voicemail.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Down the shore, Maya and Ben were arguing about their first dance, though from the way Maya kept smiling, the argument was not serious. Julian watched them for a moment. "They're happy," he said. "They are." "You could be too." I looked at him. He did not rush to soften it into a joke, but he did not push either. "I'm not asking you for anything tonight," he said. "I just don't want you to think peace means you're betraying what came before." Julian never tried to erase Ethan from my life, and maybe that was why it became easier to imagine a life after him.

I get back in the car and we head straight for the motel so that we can get ready to leave and say goodbye to this place and the life that we knew. This is for you, Archie.

Once in the comfort of my own car, I send a quick text to the girls, letting them know how sorry I am for leaving so soon. Oh, how I wanted this day to be over with.

-you never really loved me now let go of my arm it's hurting and I'll start screaming - you will not scream for everyone to see, - release me please, at this moment she spoke in a voice with tears, but I kept holding her arm even stronger and started dragging her from there, she started to struggle, she started to scream louder, let me go, I heard a voice, -Let her go now or you will regret it, - I turned around was Marcus, - you and you, you're not always, maybe the time has come for the truth of everything that you, huh, - you are crazy, release it now she spoke between her teeth, but she stuck me in front of her holding me tightly, - not her and mine, - let me go I was never yours, let me

I can't imagine his eyes being filled with so much pain right now. “I love you so much and I am now letting my love for you go,” I faced him after that. “I'm letting you go, Lucas.” I said. For his own good, I have to do this. “Do whatever you want and don't you ever think of me first before yourself,” please, Lucas. Don't prioritize me over yourself. itsclarixass

“Let it happen.” Fear gripped me. “I don’t know how!” You don’t need to know. Her voice again. Closer. Stronger. Just let go. The pain surged again And this time, I didn’t fight it. I couldn’t. I was too tired. Too overwhelmed. Too far gone. So I did the only thing left. I let go. The moment I did everything changed. The pain didn’t disappear. It intensified. But it wasn’t chaotic anymore. It had direction.

“Oh please, Alex. You’re so uptight. You need to loosen up. Seriously. You can’t go around just blowing up like this all the time.” I took a step back, running my hands through my hair as I fought for control. “Loosen up?” I laughed bitterly, pacing now, my anger boiling over. “You think I haven’t tried? You think I don’t want to just drop everything and *let go* for once? But I can’t, Liam. I can't just *forget* everything like you.”

Now I know the meaning. Letting them go doesn’t make you love them less . Instead when you let them go while they are in pain you are giving them peace that they crave . In this life the only thing they got was pain that they tried to fight but did not gain anything from it. They wanted to get rid of their lives, which means they do not want to stay anymore even if they have a reason to live .

As we walk towards his dorm building, there's an ongoing mantra in my mind: It's tonight or never. Tonight or never. Tonight. Tonight, I'm going to let go of what's holding me back and give Eli a chance. Tonight, I'll let him go. I've waited long enough. I've hurt enough. I need to get out of my mind and live my life.