Best Dark Humor

After I got a second shot at life, the very first thing I did was enroll in an intensive weight-loss boot camp. In my past life, my boyfriend was always on my case about my weight. He flat-out told me he wouldn't put a ring on it unless I got down to a hundred pounds. I tried every diet and workout plan out there—I pushed myself to the edge—but instead of losing, I packed on even more pounds. Meanwhile, my so-called best friend ate cheeseburgers, fries, and pizza like it was her job and still dropped from 130 pounds to a hundred in less than a month. The second she hit that magic number, my boyfriend's head turned. They started sneaking around behind my back. When I finally confronted them, they shoved me off a rooftop. It wasn't until after I died that I discovered the truth: my "best friend" had linked herself to a weight-transfer system. Every single pound I struggled to lose went straight to her. And every ounce of fat she should have gained? It landed right back on me. When I opened my eyes again, I was back on the exact day my boyfriend gave me his hundred-pound ultimatum. With every memory of my past life intact, I couldn't help but smile. My best friend wants to be skinny, does she? Well then, let's see how she likes being nothing but skin and bones. Let's see if forty-five pounds is skinny enough for her.

His face was inches from mine. His breath ghosted over my lips—warm, whiskey-scented from dinner and my body remembered him instantly: the way he’d pinned my wrists, the slow grind of his hips, the filthy things he’d growled in my ear while I came apart beneath him. He leaned in. I felt the pull—like gravity, like hunger. My lips parted on instinct. Just one more inch and we’d be kissing again, messy and desperate, right here in his car like teenagers who couldn’t wait. But reality crashed in. I jerked back, pressing myself against the door. “We can’t.” His jaw ticked. “Why not?” "Because I practically raised you.” My voice shook. “Because your mom is my best friend and I'm way older than you..." "I don't care" he bit out, shocking me even further. "I’ve wanted you since I was old enough to know what wanting meant. And don’t pretend like you don't feel something too." Sophie helped raise him. She was there for homework, school runs, and the lonely years when his parents were too busy. To her, he was just her best friend’s son. Years later, she catches her husband cheating on their anniversary and loses her unborn child due to the shock, Sophie spends the night with a stranger that she never expects to see again. But the stranger is Antonio — the boy she once helped raise. Now he’s all grown up. Powerful. Successful. And off limits. She manages to escape from him — so she thinks — until days later, she gets hired in a fashion company where Antonio is the CEO.

They killed her on her twentieth birthday. Her own brother sold her like cattle while his best friend watched her bleed out in the woods all for the "greater good" of their failing pack. Ivory Vale died with tears in her eyes. A betrayal like no other. One year later, she was reborn with a hunger for revenge that threatens to consume what's left of her soul. *** Dangerous, devastatingly handsome, and absolutely lethal, Dante Torrino has never met a threat he couldn't eliminate until he finds a silver-haired she-wolf covered in fluid who makes his control crack. He should kill her. His family's ancient curse demands it. Every instinct screams she's dangerous. Instead, he saves her life and finds himself drawn into her web of vengeance and secrets. Because the more he learns about her death, the more he realizes her enemies might be connected to his own family's dark empire. Some betrayals run deeper than death. Some vengeance burns hotter than hellfire. And some loves are worth being reborn for.

I’m not here to make friends. I’m here to graduate top of my class, get into the best law firm, and make my brother proud. What I’m not here for? Sharing an apartment with Cade freaking West. My brother’s best friend. Tattooed, cocky, insufferable. A walking red flag on skates with a motorcycle named Roxie and a different girl in his bed every night. We don’t get along. We never have—especially not after what happened. He hates me for it. I don’t regret it. I was right. But the longer we’re forced to live under the same roof, the harder it gets to ignore the heat. The tension. The way he looks at me like he’s two seconds from ruining my entire life.

Walang maramdaming kahit na katiting si Lucilia mula sa asawa. At kinamumuhian siya ng anak niyang lalaki dahil gusto nito ng ibang nanay. Hanngang sa mapagod at mapuno na si Lucilia ay nakipaghiwalay siya sa asawa. Iniwan niya ito. Umalis siya kasama ang anak na babae. Nagpatulong siya para ma divorce sa asawa sa pinakasikat at high paid na lawyer na si Donovan, na best friend ng asawa niyang si Nolan. Matagal ng gusto ni Donovan si Lucilia pero naunahan siya ni Nolan. Pero ngayon ay hindi niya na palalampasin ang pagkakataon na mapasakanya si Lucilia. Kaya gumawa siya ng kasunduan na tutulungan niya si Lucilia na ma divorce sa asawa kung papayag itong magpakasal sa kanya pagkatapos. Papayag ba si Lucilia? Makukuha ba ni Donovan si Lucilia? Abangan ang kwento nina Donovan at Lucilia...

"Every person has their own unique desires, Lexie," he says, his voice low and seductive. "Some are easily satisfied, while others crave more... intense experiences."As he speaks, my mind races with possibilities, each one more exhilarating than the last."Tell me," I urge, my heart pounding in anticipation."Are you sure you want to know?" he teases, his eyes dancing with mischief. "It might be more than you bargained for.""But what if,” I start, locking my eyes with his. “What if I am the one who ends up being on the top?” And my smile becomes wicked.----Lexie meant only to visit her best friend to reorganize her life. It was a simple plan, until her old time crush Noland, her best friend’s dad, showed up. He has unique tastes, but will he be ready for what Lexie has to show him?Surrendering to my Best Friend’s Dad is created by Amelie Bergen, an eGlobal Creative Publishing signed author.

“I don’t want to hurt you, Aurora…” he said in a low whisper, his breaths hot on me. I replied softly, the tears in my eyes threatening to fall, “then don’t hurt me.” But I knew he couldn't do that. His demons wouldn't let him. ~~~ At fourteen, Aurora Turner, the first daughter of the Alpha of the Moonstone pack, shifted prematurely on a full moon. But what should’ve been a night of celebration initiated the beginning of a new nightmare when the Alpha and Luna discover who their daughter’s mate is… and what he is. Though it takes Aurora more than four years to meet her destined mate, she quickly realizes that he’s nothing she’s ever dreamed of. The Dark Alpha is a million miles away from sweet, lovable, and merciful. But when trial comes and a once defeated enemy rises again, Aurora and Adrian’s untidy love might be the only thing standing in the way of mass destruction. What unravels as the enemies join forces but the packs remain divided? Can Aurora free the Alpha from the chains of his demons and look past his unsettling history? What decision will Alpha Adrian make when he’ll have to choose between his most prized mate and his most treasured pack? ~~~ THE ALPHA TRIPLETS SERIES BOOK ONE: TRIPLETS FOR THE ALPHA TRIPLETS BOOK TWO: THE DARK ALPHA'S UNWANTED LUNA* ~ Can be read as a standalone ~

“There was a fucking earthquake. It caused an avalanche on the mountain. Didn’t you feel it, you lazy piece of shit?” I yell at Kaleb. “No, I didn’t. I was fucking sleeping. Quit bitching at me.” he says. He’s wearing nothing but grey sweats that hang low on his waist. God, how can someone so fucking hot be so fucking annoying? “We are stuck here. There’s at least 25 feet of snow blocking us in this cabin. Lily and your parents can’t get back either.” I tell him. “Thanks for the observation. If we can’t get out, they obviously can’t get in.” “Can you not be a snarky asshole for 2 minutes?! We are literally fucking stuck in this cabin together for god knows how long!” I yell at Kaleb. He’s so infuriating sometimes. “Relax. I’m sure we’ll probably be out in a few hours.” “Oh you’re sure, are you? Well, guess what dipshit? The guy on the radio said they’re focusing on the surrounding areas first and then they’ll be working on the mountain. That could take fucking days, Kaleb.” Kaleb takes a step closer to me. “Don’t talk to me like I’m fucking stupid, Riley.” “Oh yeah? What are you doing to do?” “If you don’t stop with this bratty attitude, I’m going to fuck it out of you.”

~"Why is the best fruit always forbidden?"~ Alecander Blackford is that perfect Alpha blessed with the face of an angel but cursed with overbearing parents who would not stop tailing after his ass. After he runs away from the pack to stay at his aunt’s house, he did not expect that he would meet his mate who turned out to be more than he had expected and everything he was not. Soft, caring with a touch of defensive instincts, Elristeya Larsen is just that girl who has two parents that were in love since forever and a brother who would do anything to make her frustrated. When she meets her brother’s new best friend, it turned out to be the Asshole that had slammed the door in her face, Alec. She was undeniably captivated by his hypnotic orbs and the way he looked like everything a human was not. Like a different breed. Alec’s entire plan to stay away from her as far as he could begins to fall flat right before his own eyes. No matter how he tried to ignore her, like a moth to a flame he was attracted to her. When circumstances fell into place, they slowly began to get closer, creating more connection and strengthening the bond between them. Elristeya soon realized that Alec was no prince charming of hers but her beautiful downfall. Her perfect nemesis. Her flawless damnation. Theirs was the mate bond that was never supposed to be formed. Forbidden right from their births and when they try to fight against the fate that binds them, ugly and haunting secrets, capable of ruining them both and those they cherished, from the past are unleashed, threatening the soul bond they shared.

As an entrepreneur, Ashley West has spent most of her time focusing on business, but she decided to take a break from work and go on a vacation to explore and have fun. What happens when she had a one night stand with a stranger who turned out to be her father's best friend and business partner.  Caught between loyalty to her father and a desire she can no longer deny, Ashley faces a dangerous game of forbidden attraction. As emotions flare and boundaries blur, she must decide. Will she follow her heart and risk losing her father's trust or give up on her feelings for peace to reign?