Best Tagalog Jokes

When my best friend and I went for prenatal checkups, we both found out we were carrying babies with the super-male gene. The doctor advised us to terminate the pregnancies. I immediately went through with it, but my best friend was hesitant. I kindly advised her, "This child will ruin your life someday." She reluctantly agreed. Later, her husband cheated on her and tried to justify it. "If you can't give me a son, why shouldn't someone else?" Her husband's mistress chimed in, "What's the point of a woman who can't bear sons?" As a result, she blamed everything on me. When I wasn't paying attention, she poisoned my water and watched me die. When I opened my eyes again, I was back on the day of our prenatal checkup.

Si Natasha Marie Garcia ay napasok sa isang sitwasyon na hindi niya akalain na mangyayari sa kanya. Inakala niyang pupunta siya sa Silvestre Mansion para maging isang kasambahay. Ngunit nagkaroon ng setup si Don Juanito. Gusto niyang mapalapit si Natasha sa kanyang apo, kaya gumawa siya ng paraan para magkalapit sila at magpakasal. Hindi sana papayag si Natasha, pero wala siyang nagawa kundi magpakasal. Inakala niyang ikakasal lang siya sa isang mayaman, arogante, at nakakainis na lalaki. But she didn't know she was getting married to the leader of the most powerful hidden mafia in the country. Mapaglaro ang tadhana; habang tumatagal ang araw na kasama niya ang kanyang asawa, lalong nahuhulog ang kanyang loob dito. Hanggang isang araw, natuklasan ni Natasha ang lihim ng kanyang asawa. Behind his sweet and loving smile was a dangerous and powerful mafia boss. Sa una, natakot siya, pero nangibabaw ang pagmamahal niya sa kanyang asawa, kaya tinanggap niya ito ng buong puso sa kabila ng madilim nitong buhay. Masaya sila, ngunit dumating ang isang trahedya na nagbago ng kanilang masayang pagsasama. Namatay ang ina ni Natasha sa isang ambush at sinisi niya si Giovanni. She left her husband without a word because of the anger she felt. Binalot ng galit si Natasha, at nagdesisyon siyang maghiganti. Paano mapapatawad ni Natasha ang kanyang asawa kung ang sugat ng nakaraan ay masyadong malalim? Mananaig ba ang kanyang pagmamahal sa lalaking una niyang minahal? Maibabalik pa kaya ang kanilang masayang relasyon? Ano ang gagawin ni Giovanni para mabawi ang babaeng mahal niya? Babalik ba si Natasha sa kanya? O ang kanyang minamahal na asawa ay magiging kanyang kaaway?

Blurb: Pakiramdam ni Graeson Santillan, may kulang pa sa sarili niya kaya hindi niya magawang magseryoso sa buhay. Kaya hinanap niya ang sarili niya. Nilibang din niya ang sarili sa mga babae, bar hopping, car racing at iba pa. Pero gano’n pa rin ang pakiramdam niya kaya nagdesisyon siyang sumama sa kaibigang si Isagani pauwi ng probinsya, baka sakaling mahanap niya ang sarili doon. Hindi niya akalaing magiging wild ang unang gabi niya sa bayang iyon. Isa yata iyon sa hindi niya malilimutang karanasan. Pero minalas siya dahil basta na lang siya iniwan ng babaeng nakaniig na nagngagalang Beth. Hindi pa naman niya nakita nang malinaw ang totoong itsura nito. Hinanap niya ito ng mga sumunod na araw pero walang nakakakilala sa kanya. Saka naman dumating sa buhay niya ang Ate Athena ni Isagani, na matanda sa kanya ng anim na taon. Ginulo din nito ang naguguluhang puso niya, na mas lalong nagulo nang makatanggap siya nang balita tungkol kay Beth…

He was her best friend’s brother and her sworn enemy. So he was off-limits. Untouchable. But when his kisses tasted like danger and sin, neither of them cared. ……. “No one can ever know about us,” Hayden warned, his voice like gravel. “If they do… you’re dead to me.” Then he kissed me. Fierce. Reckless. And breathtaking. I fell in love with him. And I hated myself for it. ……. After one devastating breakup, Summer Peterson, the quirky, invisible, heartbroken girl, finds herself tangled in a web of secrets… in the arms of her best friend’s brother. A forbidden affair that must be hidden. Even from her best friend. Especially from him. But things spiral out of control. Now, Summer’s caught between three hearts… and one dangerous truth.  Hayden—the irresistible bad boy who only calls when it’s convenient. Matteo—the charming, mysterious exchange student who sees her. And Jake—her best friend, who suddenly wants more. Who will Summer choose, and at what cost? Because love isn’t the only thing she’s risking. It’s everything ⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING – MATURE CONTENT AHEAD This story doesn’t hold back. It dives deep into explicit sexual content, intense emotional trauma, abuse, violence, and psychological manipulation. This content is strictly for 18+ audiences. If you proceed, do so with your eyes wide open. You’ve been warned.

Love is more than just an emotion. You can feel it but you can't explain what truly it is. It just happened. It only takes a snap of fingers or blink of an eye to fall in love with someone. It do not require too much time to like a person.Two people with different set of attitudes destined to meet each other in a very odd situation. One is being already fallen and the other one is about to fall. One is already broken but the other one is still raw and whole. Yumi Illona Perez, a man-hater, who was stuck up in a situation of being the master of Rave Castillo, the Prime Master or popularly known as the Campus King of Kingston High University. Their ‘master-slave relationship’ all started with a deal. They made rules to keep the boundaries between them. But, it's true that love conquers all. It has no territories nor boundaries.Is there any chance that they will deeply love each other despite of their differences? He is sweet. She is bitter. He has a warm heart. She is cold-hearted. Love acts in a very strange way. So be prepared when you fall in love. “Is it necessary to love with a reason? If you love someone, then there should be no reason at all. Dahil kapag may dahilan at sa sandaling mawala ito, hindi mo na mahal 'yong tao. It is not called love anymore.”- Rave Castillo

Nang malaman ni Marissa na ikakasal siya sa hindi pa niya nakikilala na groom. Labis ang lungkot niya dahil may boyfriend siya na mahal na mahal niya. Nagulat si Marissa sa sampal ng daddy niya at binantaan siya nito na papatayin ang boyfriend niya. Kaya wala siyang choice kundi sumangayon sa kasal na hindi niya inaasahan. May nalaman si Marissa kay Austin na lubos niyang kinatakot. Pero habang tumatagal natutunan na niya mahalin ang asawa niya. Magiging masaya kaya sila sa huli?

PROLOGUE: Meet Celestina Guevara-Sy_ Isang Masayahing Babae , Walang ibang inaatupag kundi ang pagiging isang mabuting asawa. Maganda , Mayaman , Mabait , Matalino at higit sa lahat Sexy na halos kinababaliwan ng kalalakihan. Gabriela Javier_ Ang Matalik na kaibigan ni Celestina. Pinagkakatiwalaan at tinuring na kapatid. Sya ang KABIT ng Kanyang asawa. Zander Ford Sy_ Ang lalaking asawa ni Celestina. Na ubod ng sungit , malamig kung makitungo Simula ng bumalik sa pilipinas si Gabriela. Paano kung pinagtataksilan sya ng dalawang taong pinagkakatiwalaan nya? Ang taong minahal nya ng lubos higit pa sa kanyang BUHAY.? Magpaparaya nalang ba sya? Dahil alam nyang wala syang puwang sa puso ng kanyang asawa? O ipaglalaban nya ito kahit sya pa ang masasaktan. "B-bakit nyo ito ginagawa sakin? Pinagkakatiwalaan KO kayo? Bakit? Bakit sya pa Gabriela? Alam mo kung gaano KO sya kamahal? Simula noon? Iniwan mo sya sa ere at ako ang laging nasa tabi nya? Bakit gab.? Ngayon pa na kasal na kami? Ngayon kapa bumalik at sirain ang nabuo kung pamilya? Tinuri kitang kapatid pero niloko at inahas mo sya sakin". Celestina. " Dahil mahal ko sya Celestina. Alam mo na simulat sapul palang ay ako na ang minahal ni Zander? Alam kung alam mo yon Celestina? Nagmamahalan kami ni Zander? Kaya pakiusap palayain muna sya. Alam kung mayron pang mas deserve sa pagmamahal mo. Pakiusap Celestina kung mahal mo ako palayain muna sya? Patawad kung niloko kita o namin. Patawad Bestfriend". Gabriela natameme Ako dahil sa sinabi nito na agad Kong kinatahimik at nanatiling nag proseso pa ng mga sinasabi nya. "I'll try to love you Celestina , but I'll fail. Alam muna noon na si Gabriela lang ang minahal KO at wala ng iba. Sorry kung padalos dalos Ako sa disisyon ko. I'm sorry and please Set me FREE Celestina.". Zander. ________ Date Started: 01_24_2024 Ended: Ongoing

(This story may contain violent plotline. Read at your own risk. R18) Leigh is just an ordinary high school girl who wants to finish her studies peacefully, but things don't seem to be going as planned when she witnesses the brutality of Kenji, a guy with a darker past. She began to become involved with this guy that night, no matter how hard she tried to avoid him. Meeting him is a nightmare she never wished for-and as she becomes entangled with Kenji, unexplainable feelings begin to grow inside of her. No matter how much she tries to avoid him, fate has a way of bringing them together. How is she going to get away from him? Will she be able to get away from him, or will the opportunity to change him and make him a better person pass her by?

Being a doctor is not an easy task, well, all kinds of job is not easy. For a neurosurgeon like Dr. Helen Grace Rosario her job is like living in hell, 24/7 duty and unendingly medical charts needed to review. Together with the monstrous superiors keep on demanding. In spite of, hardship she lived up beyond her expectations through her hard works, talent and excellent skills in her work field.Dr. Rosario have all the luck that she never expected: the career and the love life with Dr. Kim Salvador, the hot and handsome cardiologist and the heir of St. Martin’s Hospital where they both working. She never thought that luck be out of her side not until her marriage in heaven fall out of place. Her marriage and her mental state was totally at wreck. Because of her desire to escape the horrible reality, she was brought back to the year 1882 where she met Joaquin.What will happen to the unexpected encounter of the past and present? What might be the consequences of this encounter into their lives? Let’s find out how Helen and Joaquin will put every thing into place.

Translated by BELLE CASSY Magsisimulang bumaligtad ang mundo ni Aurora nang makulong siya sa gitna ng isang hindi naman niya ninais na pagbubuntis at ang makipagsapalaran para lang sa‘Heart of Magic.’ Mga , werewolves at witches; lahat ay tumataya para lamang sa isang bitag, ang tuksuhin at gamitin si Aurora upang makuha ang kakaisang bato. Paano mapoprotektahan ni Aurora ang kanyang sarili at ang kan’yang dinadala mula sa mga nilalang na nagugutom lamang sa kapangyarihan? Kanino siya papanig: sa mga makapangyarihang , mabangis na werewolves, o sa mga tuso na mangkukulam o pipiliin niya bang maging mapag-isa?