Can't Stop Reading Novels & Stories

I can’t help but say, He stops, “It’s still not halfway through. Should I stop?” “No,” I say instantly. “Don’t stop please.” “I didn’t know please would be so fucking sexy.” He says over my mouth.

Sex. Nope, I won't go there. I'm not thinking of that. After moments and moments of reading the same paragraph again and again, I gave up and placed the boom back to where it belongs. I wasn't really paying attention to the storyline of the book, I'm just senselessly reading. I don't even know what the book is all about.

I can’t stop this. I can’t. I have to. I have to stop. I have to— The office spins around me, a blur of colors and shapes and plans. I clutch at the desk, at the thin wood of the desk, at the surface of the desk that cuts into the surface of me, that cuts into the thin surface of my life. It cuts into the thin surface of my thoughts, of my hands. My claws dig into the veneer, into the soft wood, into the sharp edge of what is happening, of what is coming, of what I cannot stop.

But I found myself not able to let go of her hand. And it definitely is not me doing all of this. It.. it's... “How about….” I started and I almost bit my lip to stop myself from saving it. But I can't stop it. “...we just stay?"

I’m seated in the library, at the far back with a book open, but not really reading because my thoughts are scattered all over the place, and the words go unseen by me. I gave up and put the book down when I realized I’d read the same sentence three times without knowing I was doing that. Besides, what’s the point of trying to read to quiet my mind’s voice when it doesn’t want to be quiet? It only screams louder the harder I try.

He flipped the small remote around as he gave an explanation for another one of his unreasonable gadgets. "If well targeted, it auto connects to the brain and puts a stop to it. It's like you're dead, but your heart's still working." He shrugged, "it was my plan B." "Wow." I grabbed the remote from him. "So I could have used this on my brother the whole time?" I shook my head in disbelief. "That reminds me, I still have to pause two other people, is there a time limit before this wears off?" I wondered. "Nope." He shook his head, "until I press play." He shrugged.

She asked nervously as if she was afraid she would ask the wrong question and I would lash out again. I let out a huge breath of air and took a long sip of the cold water, hoping it would help to control my temper and keep me serene. "I feel like he has transported me back to that unforgettable day and I see him, punching and kicking that innocent man, it's all so real that I begin to have a mental breakdown, but when I pull away from him, the nightmare disappears." I trailed of not thinking I can continue describing what I have to go through everyday. I blink repeatedly to stop the tears from falling.

And still, I cannot stop. AUTHOR'S NOTE: MMMN. SOMETHING FEELS SO HOT AND SPICY IN HERE. 🥵 RATE AND REVIEW PLEASE 🥵

We leave the airport and go wherever we’re headed next. I resume reading the book Rowan gave me, I was having anxiety over not being able to continue reading. Is his mother going to stop her from moving on? Will she stop Lydia from moving on from her dead son? Will she speak to Colby. My mind wouldn’t be at peace until I’ve read the entire book. I’m that obsessive reader that always checks how many chapters there are when I start a book. And I keep checking how far I am reading. When the car comes to a stop, I’m on chapter seventy.

We have to stop. I whispered over and over again, unable to contain my panic and the pleas that circulated in the deepest recesses of my mind. I was begging my body to stop, to listen to me and yet it seemed almost set in stone, like a cruel fate to continue on a path I knew had the capability of ending me, turning me absolutely insane. I knew that nothing I did or said would make me stop and yet I kept pleading with my body, kept trying to the point of exhaustion to stop myself from going towards it.