Cow Joke Novels & Stories

Eight years into marriage, and Fabian's mom finally gave me and my son her stamp of approval. Invited us to spend Christmas in his hometown. My son—Luca--and I were hyped. We picked out a gift for her and hit the road with Fabian. Right as we pulled into the village, Fabian's old friend called—crying, claiming she'd crashed her car. Fabian panicked. Left me and Luca in some random snowy mountain town and sped off. It was pitch black. Snow dumping down. Then Luca screamed. He'd stepped on a trap and dropped into a pit. Blood everywhere. I called Fabian, totally panicked. He goes, "Stella, Roxana's in a wreck. I need to be with her. Stop making everything a competition." Then he hung up. Blocked me. No time to fall apart. I wiped my face, called an ambulance. Too far out. By the time they got there, Luca was already gone. Cold. Broken. Gone. I held him and screamed until my lungs gave out. Meanwhile, Roxana's posting in the social media. All smiles in Fabian's arms. His face soft. Loving. [Highway jam turned into truth or dare. One word—"accident"—and he came flying. So happy.] I exhaled. Tagged Fabian. [Let's get a divorce.] This joke of a marriage should've ended forever ago.

My deskmate, Sierra Langford, handed me a throat lozenge. I turned around and melted it into the school cafeteria’s "Top Scholar Soup", letting all four thousand students share a taste. Because this time, I’ve been reborn. In my previous life, Sierra had a system that could steal other people’s exam scores. As long as I ate something from her, my grades would automatically transfer to her. She was a rich girl, already set to study abroad. Stealing my college entrance exam score was just a joke to her. On the other hand, I was poor. The exam was my only chance to change my fate. After three mock exams, my scores kept dropping for no reason, and no matter how hard I searched, I couldn’t find out why. In the end, I failed the college entrance exam. Lost and broken, I was hit by a car. After I died, my soul hovered in the air and overheard Sierra laughing with her best friend, Hailey Monroe. "Who would’ve thought Vera Collins could’ve ranked first in the entire city? Well, that title’s mine now! Someone like her deserves to rot in the mud forever." This time, I’m back. So, she liked stealing people’s scores for fun? Then stealing just mine would be too boring. This time, the entire school’s exam scores would be a surprise for her.

Ophelia, the daughter of Ryan and Avery, was the only survivor of the attack on the moonshine pack in the southern region. Losing her entire pack made her a Lone wolf. Hated and despised by her own kind. Her father made a request when their pack was attacked. She was to find her uncle and deliver a message. Which inadvertently sends her on a journey to the north. Ophelia had always wanted to be free, to make her own choices and experience human love, not a forced bond. She wanted to love on her own terms, but nature had set her on a different course. During this journey, Ophelia discovers that she is mated to the Monarch, and it is her second shot at life. As if playing a cruel joke on them, nature paired a Lonewolf with the Monarch, a man with no tolerance for weakness, to a woman born from an ordinary wolf. A woman who did not even want a mate. Ophelia cannot morph into her wolf until she fully remembers who she is. Her body has to merge with her soul to trigger the transformation process; she is set on a quest to remember. She uncovers secrets she discovered in her past life, and with the help of Aaron, her mate, they unravel the mystery behind the existence of the half-bloods and identify the traitor in their ranks. Together, they save humanity from the torment brought to them by the half-bloods, rescue the captured wolves, and avenge their fallen heroes (her parents). They bring order back to the world. Proving that love can be found in the most unusual of places.

"I, Alpha Kai Xander of Blue Crest pack, denounce you, Ariel as my mate," My world came crumbling down my feet as I stare at the man I have spent these recent years of my life, worshipping and loving like he was my god. The man that gave me nothing, but assurance that we will eventually end up together as mates. Was I a joke to him? Did he say all those words to me to get in between my legs? "What are you saying, alpha?" I need someone to wake me up from this nightmare which I so much not want to be reality. "What about the promises you made to me? You told me you would be with me forever. You told me you loved me..." "This is your fate, Ariel. Promises are made to be broken, and you have no right to question my decision. You are nothing, but a stranger that knows nothing about her origin. What were you expecting? Take you as my mate and spend the rest of my life being insulted by people? Never!" As if those words means nothing, as if it won't hurt me, he spills them out, while I stand here staring at him with my mouth agape. Now, that's it. Promises are made to be broken, but I never imagined he'd break his to me. Where do I start from?

They say that psychos can never love. But what if a psycho falls in love? It sounds like a joke, doesn't it? But he punishes the people who make fun of his love in front of him. A ticket to hell. He is a psycho, A serial killer, A ruthless ruler, And what else? An Obsessed Lover. His heart decided to beat again, only after seeing her. He was drawn to her not only by her beauty but by her innocence. Because even the devil himself feeds on innocent souls. Her laughter settled in his ear. Her smile gave him breath and her face made his heart beat. Having found the reason to live once again, now he did not want to lose it. Now she had become a means of living for him. Why? Because have we not known from the beginning that love conquers all? Her innocent love conquered his evil but in the midst of all this, she lost her soul. How? Because he snatched it from her. He used his evil ways to get her and that is how he broke her. Injured her. And that was the reason, she could not love him back It was complicated. A pure venom was inflicted by him. In her. It was so toxic that it just made her soul leave her body. His insanity proved fatal. But whatever others say, the feeling was pure. It was naive and that is why it is still called Love.

My mate, Kane Blackwood, was the most feared Alpha in the Northlands. For three years, he treated me like something that belonged to him. He would drag me into his arms on the stone steps after moon rituals, pin me against the wall in Blackthorn Keep’s long corridors, and bite the mark on the back of my neck beside the patrol trails in the border woods, as if he needed everyone to remember exactly whose Luna I was. I used to think that was his way of loving me. Rough. Possessive. Lacking tenderness. But love, all the same. Until one night, I stopped outside the council hall and heard an elder say in a furious voice, “Those charcoal sketches on the black market were released by your people, weren’t they? Every one of them is of you and Elena in bed. She has become a joke across the pack. Do you even understand what you’ve done?” There was a brief silence. Then Kane said, coldly, “She is the Luna the council chose for me. She is not the woman I wanted.” I stood frozen outside the door. All those years, I thought his roughness meant he loved me too fiercely to be gentle. But it was never love. It was humiliation. Punishment for taking the place of the woman he actually wanted. I lowered my eyes to the moonstone bracelet on my wrist, the one he had clasped there the day our mating contract was sealed. If that was all I had ever been to him, then I would leave.

The marking ceremony had reached the moment when the Luna crown should be exchanged, but my mate in name only still refused to lower his head. Once Drake Blackwood bit the side of my neck and completed the marking, our 66th ceremony would finally become real. Yet his eyes stayed fixed on his phone, and he did not even look at me. All because his widowed sister-in-law, Scarlett Moore, had posted a claim-release statement an hour earlier. Her late husband had been Drake’s older brother. Under pack law, Drake was obligated to protect her. Attached to her post was a ticket for a private pack flight, showing that she would land in an hour. Drake suddenly rose and announced in a low voice to the elders and pack members that the marking ceremony would be postponed. Then he left me standing there alone, turning me into a joke before the entire pack. I calmly packed away the Luna crown, calmly apologized to the guests, and calmly saw everyone off. After that, I opened Scarlett’s latest post on the MoonNet feed. In the photo, Drake stood beside her, holding out a newly hunted moonstone. I gave a bitter smile and called my birth parents through the private pack link. “Father, Mother, I’m willing to come back now.” “I’ll accept the marriage alliance for the Frostvale Pack.”

Vivian Grant lost her memory and forgot everything about me. Her memory stopped in the year when she loved her ex-husband most. No matter how the people around her tried to explain it, she still believed I was the third party who had come between them. The doctors said her amnesia might be treatable, so I held on to that hope and refused to let go. For three years, we got divorced and remarried over and over again. We became the biggest joke in the city's elite circles. Some people even started betting on us. They bet on when I would finally give up, and when Vivian would finally remember. Then news of our eighth divorce hit the trending charts again. Reporters rushed into the law firm with cameras on their shoulders. They shoved microphones in my face, their questions full of provocation. "Mr. Sterling, as a divorce attorney, how does it feel to have been divorced eight times yourself?" The firm's sign was smashed. The commendation banners clients had given me were trampled underfoot. Before I could respond, my supervisor fired me for damaging the profession's reputation. "Julian Sterling, let me give you some advice. Have some self-respect. Stop clinging to Ms. Grant." I clenched my trembling hands and suddenly felt exhausted. They were right. This time, I really should give up.

We were on our way to celebrate our son’s birthday when we got into a car crash. When I woke up, I looked at my family gathered around my hospital bed and cracked a joke: “Sorry, but who are you guys?” I held back a smile, curious to see how they'd humor their "amnesiac" patient. Would my mother grab my hand in a panic? Would my husband look at me with worry? Would my son rush over, crying and calling me Mom? What I didn't expect was for them to freeze for a moment—and then, almost in unison, let out sighs of relief. My mother was the first to speak, her tone unmistakably lighter, as if a huge weight had been lifted. "If you don’t remember, it’s probably for the best. This is Lindsay—your sister, she’s my daughter. You were adopted." My husband then pointed at me and said to our son, "You should call her Aunt Wendy." Before the shock could even sink in, I watched the child I'd fought so hard to protect turn and throw himself into the arms of Lindsay. "Mom! I played outside all day. I missed you so much!" So that was the truth. My amnesia was exactly what they'd been hoping for. In that case, I didn't need this made-up life anymore.

Five years after the death of his fated mate, Alpha Blade found himself lost in the abyss of life. He had abandoned his pack and chose to lead a mercenary life to avenge the death of Soledad, his fated mate. But even after justice was served, he felt empty, and the need to take more lives had become his way of life. With too much blood in his hands, he became ruthless and cold-hearted, with no direction, no goal, and no will to survive—until destiny decided to play a cruel joke on him and gave him a light witch for a second-chance mate.  Confused and not wanting to betray the memory of his first mate, Blade fought against the new bond the Goddess gave him, only to find himself being drawn more to the young witch who was slowly lighting up the darkness surrounding him. But when lies, betrayals, and secrets come to light, will their bond survive the test of fate, or will the truth spiral them into the darkness lurking behind the shadow?  ***** BEYOND THE DARKNESS: The Alphas Little Witch is the third installment of the INTO THE DARKNESS SAGA. To understand the world I created, I highly suggest reading the first two books, also available on Goodnovel/Buenovela/Meganovel. INTO THE DARKNESS SAGA BENEATH HER DARKNESS: The Alpha's Little Demon BRAVING THE DARKNESS: One Night With the Demon King (attached to the book Beneath Her Darkness - after its epilogue) BEYOND THE DARKNESS: The Alpha's Little Witch ***** For updates and teasers, follow me on my I G and F B  - author.cassa.m / www.facebook.com/groups/cassandra.m.world