Deer Blind Dad Jokes

Kiersey had her life going great for her, in fact, it was supposed to have been getting better. After two unsuccessful artificial inseminations, she and her high-handed husband were finally going to have a baby. But then a mix-up at the clinic pulls the plug out of her marital life, sending everything spiralling down the drain when they discover she had been given the wrong sperm. Her husband's rejection and consequent divorce were the first out of Pandora's box, fearing for her baby's life and amidst the series of heartbreaks, she has to find an anonymous sperm donor and have him tested for Triple-A Syndrome, of which she was a non-affected carrier. When she runs into Aithan Reeves, one of Springfield's rising young millionaires, on one of her clue huntings and then starts to fall for him, she discovers there's always a second chance at love. But she wouldn't stop looking for her baby daddy, she had to be emotionally prepared. Will Kiersey let go of her second chance for her continued search, or will she embrace it and hope for the best? And just what else did Aithan have to offer her apart from his love?

"But Angelo, I love you and we could be together and we won't have to abort our baby." I sobbed my eyes becoming red. "Raina, listen it's not Ours that's your responsibility and secondly I'm sorry, I can't return those feelings...we fucked that's all there was to it." He spurt coldly and my heart broke it a million pieces making me cry even more when he left banging my office door. - Raina Williams a preachers kid, who believes in love, a successful lawyer. She just finished college and is currently working at a well-known law firm. She meets Angelo Le roux, her bosses son from Netherlands, the arrogant billionaire bachelor who doesn't do commitment. He doesn't have to sweep her off her feet to get her into bed. She gets pregnant and he tells her off to get an abortion..

"Don't play coy with us, Jacqueline. You know that we want you," Grady was to my back and kissed my naked shoulder excruciatingly slowly. We...oh, fuck. ***** Since a very young age, Jacqueline has always been the adventurous type. Growing up she didn't change, her curiosity developed in all aspects of her life. But watching her mom wilted away because of her dad's affairs made her swear not to fall for any man. She moved miles away from home to free herself of her family's hypocrisy and judgemental view of their social circle. Jacqueline couldn't believe the day when she was recruited by an escort agency. Her love of intimacy was reflected in ways she always imagine. The lack of family closeness made her crave attention from others, up until the day she met the twins, from then on she never felt so suffocated in all her life. Follow Jacqueline's journey as she discovers love, not only from one but two men. How will she handle them, and will she follow her guts and fall for both brothers?

"Bend on your knees and spread those legs, babygirl! I want to see all of you." Isabella aka Bella, an 18-year-old girl who just completed high school and is currently waiting to join college. She moved to California to live with her mother and her newly wedded husband. She felt an immediate sexual tension with her step-dad, Oliver Taylor. Bella soon found herself going through various, irresistible sexual escapades with this charming, seductive fellow in the absence of her mom. She knows it is a sin to think such things about an older man, specifically her mother’s partner. He's clearly off limits but she can't help it. But what happens when he comes forward about also feeling this way for her? Oliver Taylor is a wealthy 30 year old businessman, freshly married to a 37 year old woman, Saanchi. When he met his wife's daughter, he immediately fancied her. He also had secret fantasies about her that he felt extremely guilty about. He wanted to fuck her till she couldn’t walk, treat her like princess, love her like she’s the only girl in the world but she was his stepdaughter. He was known as the devil of the business world and they surely didn't call him the devil for nothing. What started out as a simple and confusing attraction turned into something more, way more than they wanted. A taboo romance between two people. This could be the best thing that ever happened or the worse. Would Bella ruin her relationship with her mother for her forbidden love? But what would happen when the attraction was mutual? What would be the fate or outcome of such an act and would her mom ever get to know the atrocity going on right under her nose?

"Let me borrow your husband for one night and I spare your dad's life." Trishia Meyer, the daughter of the Senator said. Arabella Jones was dumbfounded. She had to make a choice. To saved her father's company, Arabella had agreed to marry the evil billionaire, Bill Sky. They were bound to meet again after their coincidental kissed that night. They agreed to sign a non-disclosure contract and they swore not to love each other. Sacrificing herself to be with the domineering cold man and turning a blind eye to his sexual affairs with other women were some of the things she needed to endure everyday. Marriage with no love. Now that she conceived his baby, he wanted it to be aborted instantly. She thought that the baby inside her tummy would bring them closer together but he accused her on deceiving him. He looked at her as a two-timer and the worst gold digger. Arabella Jones then made a promise to herself that she would do everything to live a happy life with her baby away from him. Little did she knew, it's not for her to decide, that if the billionaire's wrath would allow her.

In a whirlwind of deceit and desire, Jasmine's life is turned upside down when her father remarries, setting off a chain of events that includes betrayal by her step-sister Layla and her own boyfriend, Paul. For her mother's treatment, Jasmine becomes a surrogate mother, leading to the birth of twins. Just as she begins to rebuild, billionaire Damon sets his sights on her, igniting a passion neither can deny. Their steamy encounters reveal hidden desires and challenge Jasmine's resolve. Damon's lips brushed against hers, sending shivers down her spine. "Trust me, Jasmine. Let me show you a world of passion and pleasure you've only dreamed of." "Stop it," Jasmine said. Suddenly two sweet buns interrupted their moment, "Mommy, Mommy, Dad is not little child, we are. love us!"

Warning: Mature Content "Tell me all your sexual fantasies, princess." "I want to be fucked, ruined, choked, and marked until I’m a moaning, crying mess, leaking all over your sheets, daddy." Grace’s world shattered the night she found out her fiancé was gay. Drunk, devastated, and desperate to forget, she stumbled into the wrong hotel room, and into the arms of Apollo Reed. He is a sinfully hot, cold-hearted forty-year-old man, twice her age. He’s everything she was never supposed to want. And everything she never knew she needed. But reality hits hard the next morning when she realizes the man who gave her the first orgasm of her life is her new boss. Will she let him take her again? Please her until she’s trembling, begging, and utterly his? Or will she finally learn that wanting a man like him always comes with a price? "Good girl. Now spread those legs."

BLURB “MOMMY I'VE FOUND DADDY” Those four words were enough to change her life forever. Ella Rocci, a single mother trying to make ends meet to provide for her five-year-old daughter, Ivy. Life was a daily struggle, but Ivy's playful antics brought joy and unexpected adventures. Ivy has a knack for playing matchmaker, often pretending to get lost in hopes of pairing her mom with a nice man. But what happens when Ivy brings home Rodriguez DeLuca, a man who not only exudes wealth and charm but also happens to be the one-night stand from years ago—who's now revealed to be Ivy's father. As their past collides with the present, Ella must navigate a whirlwind of emotions, unexpected connections, and the possibility of a love she never dared to dream of.

I’m Ellie, an orphan. I fall in love with my daddy’s friend, Austin. He’s the Alpha King. He’s my adoptive father. And he’s twice my age. --- Ellie accidentally has a one-night stand with a stranger the day her adoptive father returns from war. Wow, this stranger is so hot and good in bed! He’s much better than her scary guardian, only the room is too dark to see his face. --- When bloodthirsty, ruthless Alpha Austin learns his little Ellie had a one-night stand with a man, he is furious. "Who is that guy?" "You have no right to know who he is!" "If I find out who that stupid male dog is, I'll make him regret doing this to you!" "He isn't a stupid male dog. He’s the best man I've ever met. He's sexy, he's strong and he makes me happy!" Until one day, Austin finds that stupid male dog is him…

Rejected on the night of a forced wedding, Ruby Blackwood finds herself cast aside by both the werewolf pack and her own family. Betrayed by those closest to her and stripped of her place as the Luna, Ruby is left to rebuild her life from the ground up. Seven years later, as a successful fashion designer and mother of twins, Ruby’s past collides with her present when Alpha Roman D’Angelo returns, demanding answers—and a second chance. But Ruby is no longer the weak girl he discarded, and this time, it’s her turn to either reject him or forgive and accept him.