Depressing Funny Quotes Novels & Stories

Readers said. 'Very funny, I needed cold showers! I dropped my tablet in the bath! Totally original. Outrageous. The goddesses thread is totally original.' Goddesses - is this what 50 Shades should have been about? Connie Grimshaw, is now a successful businesswoman in an international consultancy. She reached these dizzy heights by believing her mother - work hard and reject emotional needs. On a business trip, the dam bursts and her libido refuses to be silenced. Her PA (Dee) helps her reconcile her lascivious feelings by using a series of parables from ancient goddesses. This works until the goddesses land her in hilarious, embarrassing and sometimes, dangerous situations as she develops the vamp in herself. But there are forces at work, which try to mismanage her feelings. Can she defeat the bad boys? Firstly, she has to deal with Greg, the evil misogynist.

“You have to choose between death or becoming my slave. Either I give you a death sentence now, or your life becomes enslaved. I have given you the liberty to choose.”  On the night of her 18th birthday, the time came for princess Alexa of the Blue Scorpion pack to meet her mate. This particular moment was everything she’d hoped for, but in the end, what happened was not what she'd expected. She found her mate, alpha Logan of the Red Lotus pack, the youngest, most charming and most desired alpha in all the realm, also happens to be her enemy. That night, Logan was bent on achieving his revenge against Danister, the Blue Scorpion alpha. He wasn’t going to let anyone get in the way, not even Alexa. That same night unlocked a new life for Alexa, not only was her pack taken into captivity but she, the high-held princess, was also taken into slavery at the hands of her mate. For the trauma her father caused him in the past, Logan plans to do so many things to Alexa. He wants to hurt her, to make her pay for all his suffering, he wants to make life as miserable as possible for her, till the point she begs for death. Now, there’s only one problem standing in the way of his plans; the mate bond they share won’t let him. Instead, it draws him closer to her; it makes him yearn for her in the most unimaginable ways. Find out where this love story between Alexa and Logan will lead in The Alpha's Hated Slave Mate. Book 1 of the werewolf mate series Book 2- The Beta's Unexpected Mate For updates on character reveals and quotes, including all my books, follow my Facebook page, Eyitee's library.

Due to her manly name, Ryan, a 23-year-old woman, was forced to live in the same house with five billionaires - Terban, Kyle, Chaylen, Slyvester, and Vincent. She thought everything will go smoothly if she stays away from these men who always fight each other. Until one day, the handsome men started to act weirdly around Ryan. Will she be able to survive in the house with five hot guys who stare at her as if she's a lamb in the den of the Wolves?

Victoria Carson is 17 and in love with Bruce Wayne and Thera nothing that could make her happier. That is till a summer mistake threatens the he dreams and hopes for a brighter future. Could she ever be able to face Bruce? Or will she keep this a secret even if it's driving a wedge between her and her future? Bruce Wayne just couldn't be happier, finally coming home to his beautiful girlfriend, the love of his life. He is confused and hurt when she starts to ignore him, frustrated Bruce is set on finding the cause of her strange behavior. But is he ready for the truth? As it shakes the very foundation of their relationship, will they ever be able to get through this,or is their love doomed to fail?

Charlie is a childish woman with a lot of secrets from the past that she can't tell to her husband, Drake. Drake is a serious type of person who will bear the struggles of being a husband of Charlie and might put him in a very dangerous situation because of the secrets Charlie have. Such as being an ex-assassin and currently a loan shark. With a misunderstanding in the past incident, someone will die, someone will be save and someone will have to pay. The question is.........who will be who?

Cassandra is summoned by a magical owl, and she discovers that another world exists in the middle of Siberia, where monsters, faeries, elves, and sorcerei fight for domination. She soon becomes inextricably involved in the affairs of this 'other dimension' that lies behind a magical mirror, and everyone in that realm is at the mercy of the blue moon. But Cassandra has never expected to meet a sorceress quite like Princess Vasilisa, not to mention, she is an actual legendary Vasilisa the Wise from the fairytale she has read as a kid. Vasilisa is also a daughter of an evil sorcerer Czar, and whose plan is to overrule the human world and the magical world with the help of an all-powerful dark lord, Koschei, the Deathless. When the night of the solstice arrives, Cassandra's mortal realm and the magical one will collide. If she doesn't help Vasilisa find the Golden Wand and stop her greedy father before the winter solstice, both their lives and everyone else's will fall into an inevitable apocalypse.

comes Dove Callum: weird, always happy, wild, beautiful with blonde hair and blue eyes, president of the school body council, all A student and two mothers enters Liam Scott: loner, moody face, hot as hell, brown hair, green eyes, very tall and let's not forget a British accent .. The day callum sets her eyes on Liam for the first time, the only thing on her mind is love, love at first sight but Liam doesn't want anything to do with love or callum..

Hazel Williams is a sweet affable 16-year-old who just started high school. When the people closest to her started dating, she felt left out and alone. Watching her crush with his girlfriend every day wasn't helping either, especially when Theo is her brother's best friend since kindergarten whom she practically grew up with. Her newfound friendship with her school's star dancer, Lee, helped her cope with her situation. But things got complicated when her long-time crush started to show feelings for her and at the same time, she found herself falling for her new best friend. Part 2 In the second year of high school, a new celebrity student arrives and turned her school upside down. What started as a student-guide relationship blossomed into a unique friendship. Her troubled new friend not only stirs the situations at school but also her relationship with her boyfriend. When her first-ever relationship finally came to an end, her old crush came back into her life for the Summer and they were tempted to rekindle their feelings for each other the year before. This story is still ongoing, read on to find out what happens next. Part 2 is currently only available on GoodNovel.

TangShi is a girl without much luck in the world. Despised by her father after her mother died giving birth to her, she has grown up in a cold and unloving environment and hated by her stepmother. Blamed for things she could never control and treated as an outcast by her own blood. Forced to come home after finally escaping to school on a self achieved scholarship abroad, she is promised to the son of the Leng family. To create a beneficial business alliance to further her own father's greed in the corporate world. Only YuZhi Leng is as unwilling as she is, with a girlfriend already in place that he adores and no desire to honor the contract put in place - to produce an heir in the first year of marriage and solidify the two families union. TangShi must bear living as a third wheel in this unwanted life and accept or be thrown aside by her family. Until upon meeting, she realizes that YuZhi may not be the stranger to her she thought he was and recognizes him on sight. Could he be the man she met eight years ago at a masked ball, who swept her off her feet and made her feel alive, and yet left her heartbroken that fateful night? A rollercoaster of a marriage is about to be embarked upon.

Deception, indecision,envy, love take the order of the day as Davina Othis, a human girl who is hated and not wanted by her family gets transported to an alternate universe by a witch. In this universe, she finds out that human beings are given abilities to shape shift into wolves and more importantly, herself in alternate universe,is Alexis (her doppelganger) the alpha, Calvin Sanchez's mate and Alexis is missing. Frail hearted and desperate to stay alive in a world of animals, she plays the part of Alexis, the Alpha's real mate with the help of the alpha's aide and trusted friend Dante. Dante protects her from the werewolves and teaches her how to act like Alexis and they both deceive Calvin, the Alpha. But what will happen when the conspiracy between Raymond Sanchez, Calvin's elder brother and the Beta wolf and Amber the alpha's ex girlfriend is revealed and Alexis is actually dead not missing. Will Dante be able to protect Davina as Raymond and Amber try to kill her? What will happen when Calvin, finds out that his mate is not only an impostor but also a human being unable to shape shift into a wolf? And what will unfold as Dante begins to fall deeply in love with Davina, the alpha's mate. Will he go against the alpha? And also, what will happen to Calvin, the Alpha as his elder brother Raymond, the beta leads a pack of rogue wolves and tries to become the alpha? Read Fated To More Than One Alpha to find out.