Food Jokes

“Do you feel that, Rose?” He asked in a gruff tone. “The effect I have on you is real. Don’t deny it. Don’t deny me.” Rose’s cheeks burn with shame, even though she pushed her bosom more into his hand, seeking the pleasure she knew he could give her. Then, she recalled that they were in a restaurant, and stilled at once, eyes wide, heart thudding wildly, and breathless. “We’re in a bar,” she told him, her protest sounding weak even to her own ears. “A desert one,” he chuckled. She turned around, and saw that the restaurant was indeed vacant, save for them, and Enzo and Stefan who were standing by the door, their backs to them. It was rush hour, and that couldn’t have happened, even if the food was terrible — and it wasn’t. She understood immediately that the divillish man sitting next to her, who starred in all her fantasies as of late, had ensured that they would have the privacy they needed. For a ruthless mafia boss, he sure could be considerate. ... ... ... ... When Rose meets a mafia boss on one of her night shifts, she thinks he is a peculiar and unpleasant patient whom she would do well to avoid... Little does she know that that encounter is but the beginning to a tumultuous passionate chapter of her life. Risking everything for the man shouldn't be an option... And yet, she soon finds herself caught in his web of sin, desire, and obsession.

I was a year old when I tried to get some food from my sister's plate. My parents were so angry that they slapped me, rendering me deaf in my right ear. They also hated me until the day I died. They called me a monster that only knew how to take her sister's things. The day I learn I have a terminal illness, I call Mom and tentatively say, "I'm sick, Mom. The doctor said it's a brain tumor. Can you come to the hospital?" She sneers. "You're better off dead. I hope it happens quickly and that you're not at home when it does. I don't want to touch your body." I know they've always looked forward to my death. But when their wish finally comes true and their birth daughter dies, they lose their minds.

Prisca, alias Prisca Ese Gideon, is a fast-rising diva who gets into trouble after photos and videos of herself being intimate with her boyfriend gets leaked on the internet. Her fame and success in the music industry begins to crumble. Her family dissociates from her, she loses many big money endorsement deals, and worse of all, she loses her fan base. The public now sees her as a sex object, making fun and dirty jokes about her. Due to these actions, she isolates herself from the public, vowing to herself never to speak to anyone or have a personal relationship with any person in particular. Months after her rock-bottom escapades, she finds love in the hands of a die-hard fan, Diri, who helps her get back at her boyfriend, Clem (sound engineer of S.K. records, the same record label Prisca was signed into) and helps her get over her rock bottom experiences.

Braving a downpour, I delivered a lavish food order, anticipating the hefty commission and a $100 tip. Laughter suddenly echoed from the villa. Someone started, "He really believes your car crash left you paralyzed? He's hustling deliveries to support you and even pawned his dad's heirloom?" Another said, "What if he discovers you're actually a billionaire heiress, just playing poor? He'd probably break down in tears." Jessica Stark toyed with her wine glass. "Guys like him are wired to serve, especially since he always outshone Mark in our school days. This is his comeuppance." I stood in the relentless rain, a bitter chuckle escaping my lips. Turned out, her two-year charade of paralysis was merely to avenge her childhood sweetheart. Her broken legs, deceased parents, and helpless tears were all meticulously crafted lies. Disillusioned, I dialed my estranged tycoon mother. "You win. I'll go through with the arranged marriage."

Sara Atkins just wants to start anew. No Noah anymore. No food technology. No worries about love. She just needs a breeze of fresh air. An opportunity presents itself when Sara finds out about Beaumont, one of the biggest money companies in the US, who are searching for another accounting assistant. Miraculously, the Austrian girl is hired the day she gets interviewed, even if a bit too easily in her opinion. They had warned her about new position and her boss, however, she hadn't understood why. Until she met him. Mr Beaumont isn't only a tyrant, a brooding and yelling boss who hates tardiness and self-doubt, but also the most handsome man Sara has ever laid eyes on. Imposing, tall and handsome, the soon 30-year-old has already forced his way into her life. Cold, too witty for his own good, stern and unpredictable, this CEO is causing Sara way more trouble than she had anticipated - Mr. Beaumont makes her working day a living hell, makes her face countless of obstacles and plays with her mind as he pleases. Her cheating husband is enough headache as it is, but now Sara can't stop thinking about her boss who has been strangely nice to her, even though she can't stand him ... or is she just lying to herself?

Roxanne Rowan is a spiritual news editor. After an accident in the year twenty-two, Roxanne Rowan was able to see ghosts. She goes around trying to find a way to solve this ability. Her fear of ghosts makes her taciturn and closed off. During an encounter with evil spirits, Roxanne met Egan Griffith, the demon employee of hell. He has the task of catching the demons that are causing trouble in the living world to bring them to hell and punish them. According to the orders of the spirit world, if Roxanne wants to break the ability to see ghosts in her eyes, she must cooperate with Egan to catch the devil spirits. The contract is signed and many bad jokes happen. Roxanne's fate and secret are also revealed. She also realizes that demons come in two forms: disrupting people in the living world and trying to earn money in order to survive like a normal person. Every night, Roxanne has to lie in bed waiting for Egan to finish processing the documents for the company. She doesn’t think from an unequal partnership to rolling in bed so close together.

Winifred Jaeger comes from an ordinary family. She meets Timothy Stringer, a rich heir who falls for her at first sight. He immediately starts pursuing her with gusto. Winifred knows they're from different worlds, so she keeps rejecting him. He doesn't give up, though. When she wants to have food from her hometown, he steps into the kitchen for the first time ever. He cooks for her, relishing in it despite getting scalded. When she wants to have candy, he lines up in the dead of winter to get it for her. The iciness and sharp wind don't faze him. She likes fringe tree flowers, so he gets seeds from all over the world. He covers a mountaintop with them for her. She likes making desserts, so he buys ingredients for her from various places. He's more than happy to test her finished products. When she's in a bad mood, he makes sure to cheer her up despite being sick. When Winifred graduates from college, Timothy spreads 99,999 roses on the field to propose to her. She finally realizes she's long since fallen for him, so she says yes. Everyone says she's lucky to have met a man who loves her so and thinks of her as his only one. Yet it's precisely this man who cheats on her when they're about to get married. He tells her he loves her, yet he almost manically tries to have a baby with his mistress. Heartbroken and devastated, Winifred chooses to leave. It's only after she's gone that Timothy searches for her like crazy. When he finds her, he does everything possible to beg her to go back to him. He paces outside her door and begs her incessantly, his eyes red-rimmed. However, she turns him down calmly. "It's too late—you're a closed chapter in my book, and I'm already on a new chapter." Winifred turns to look at a tall, handsome man standing nearby—Timothy's childhood friend, Cyrus Littrell.

A single misstep, and the consequences were severe. I am Moxie Guerra, known to all who know me as a devil with the face of an angel. At the age of seventeen, I am a woman with high standards in every aspect of life. I insist on the best food, the most luxurious clothing, and when it comes to men, they must be extraordinarily wealthy, attractive, and well-known. Born to my father's mistress, who passed away after my birth, I am scorned by my father's second family. As the daughter of a mafia boss, I was brought up in a perilous environment. No one perceived me as patient or kind. Instead, I was feared, much like my father, which was my Achilles' heel. However, when I discovered that my father had arranged my marriage to the richest son in the country without my approval, my rebellious streak surfaced. I wasn't just the daughter of a mafia boss for appearances. I was as obstinate and egocentric as my father. I decided to flee to a place where my father would least expect me to be. I stopped at the nearest bar for some liquid courage before driving to my mother's hometown. It was a humble province, filled with trees and dirt roads, a stark contrast to my opulent lifestyle. But my survival was more crucial than my sophisticated tastes. However, my car broke down in the middle of a vast highway on the way there. Despite being inebriated, I managed to survive. A man in a black Hummer arrived and came to my aid. His smile was menacing and disconcerting.

He was very angry. He was looking at me like he wants to either rape me or punch my face. "I can expla- " He cuts me off. "You have been a very very bad kitty. You have no idea what I've been through." His grip on my neck tighten suffocating my food pipe. "Strip." The word brought me out of the electric shock. "Wha- " "I m counting till 3 if you didn't, I'll tear your clothes off - 1." Is this really happening? "2." I thought he was gay. "3." --------------------------------------------------- Emara, 21 years old human who disguises herself as a man to get a job in a Multinational company. But little she did know ... 1. The boss is smoking hot. 2. He is not human. 3. She is his mate. What will happen when the Big Bad Wolf will meet his Mate? How will he react knowing his mate is a Guy, not a Girl? What will happen when the truth will flood out? Who will drown? Who will swim?

Eleanor always wanted a fresh start. She was raised in the mafia and was constantly exposed to guns, death, and blood. On the night she is kidnapped by an infamous Don, she manages to escape. But instead of going back to her old life, she decides to start a new one. She runs into the city of Rome and her true passion and love for food are sparked. When she meets Dante Santa Cruz, she no longer believes that anything can return her to the world she fled. But how could she forget that she was the daughter of the mad queen?