Funny Dirty Quotes Novels & Stories

“I’m going to have to eat your pussy since you won’t stop trembling like that, little mate.” The words rumble from Vincenzo’s throat as he pins me to the bed, his fangs grazing my inner thigh while Lorenzo and Valentino watch with glowing eyes, cocks already hard and leaking for me. I ran from my ex after catching him buried in another man, whining about an “open marriage” like I was disposable. Betrayed. Shattered. Done. Then the Drakvolk brothers found me—three godlike Lycan Alphas, rulers of the most ruthless pack alive. Brothers in blood, bonded in power, and destined to share one woman. Me. They’ve shared kills, territory, and secrets since they were pups… and now they share my body. Vincenzo’s tongue dives in first, slow and punishing, making me arch and gasp. Lorenzo’s rough hands spread me wider, fingers teasing my clit while he growls, “Scream for us, omega.” Valentino claims my mouth, swallowing every moan as their knots swell, promising to fill me completely—stretching, marking, breeding. No more lies. No more holding back. Just three primal gods taking turns, then taking me all at once, until I’m dripping, knotted, and begging: Moan for us… forever. The Alphas’ Dirty Desires

!!WARNING!! This series will wreck your panties and your soul; no safe words, no apologies. Expect a possessed woman being exorcised: spiritually and physically by the priest’s dick to a high school famous ball player, ramming his hard c*ck into his best friend’s mother's soaked c^nt to lesbians cheating on one another for the same throbbing, cum-slicked monster cock and many more. This collection would be filled with some of the craziest affairs known to be taboos to healthy people but a normal way of life to sex starved CEO’s, doctors, divorced women and others. If “please, Daddy, harder” makes you clutch your pearls… slam this shut and run. But if the idea of being taken, marked, and filled until you can’t think straight has you throbbing already…flip the page, slut. You’ve been warned. Grab your sex toys ladies Cause author Xena is coming with the heat. kisses.

⚠️ WARNING: Only for readers 18+ who like their stepbrothers FERAL and their stepfathers FILTHY. *** He bit me at a frat party I only attended to get over my ex. Three days later, he was sitting across from me at my mother's engagement dinner – and then standing at the foot of my bed unbuckling his belt at 1:47 AM. Knox Voss is a werewolf, a biker, and my new stepbrother. He marked my neck so every wolf in the city knows I'm his, and he fucks me like he's trying to ruin me for anyone else. It's working. But his father is worse. Dominic Voss is my professor, my stepfather, and a wolf who's hidden behind a suit for twenty years. He locks his office door on Thursdays, then takes me apart with a cruelty so precise it feels like worship. I'm human. They're not. I'm sleeping with both of them in the same house, down the hall from my mother – and a world I was never supposed to know about is closing in. A jealous she-wolf who feels every orgasm through a broken bond. An Alpha uncle who considers my existence a death sentence. And a law that says the punishment for a human knowing about wolves is execution. Knox claims my body. Dominic reads my soul. Both will burn this family down before they let me go. And I can't stop going back. Contains: werewolf shifters, stepbrother/stepfather, MC bikers, over-the-knee discipline, bite bonds, Level 2 shifts that make him BIGGER in every way, and a mother who never looks at the right moment. All characters are 18+. All scenarios are fiction. All orgasms are supernatural.

A young guy keeps getting into trouble in very funny and unfortunate ways. He wrecked havocs on people too, mistakenly. He hallucinated and had great fantasies about people to brighten up his hearers. Afterwards, he came back to his mundane reality.

I REALLY DO NOT HAVE TO WARN YOU DO I?Desire doesn’t ask. It corrupts. A married coach buries his cock bare in his brother’s best friend while his pregnant wife waits at home. A boyfriend offers his lover as the main course for seven hungry men on his birthday, turning him into a wrecked, leaking toy. Taboo. Risky. Filthy. Guilt only makes the thrusts deeper. Getting caught only makes the loads hotter. Boundaries shatter as bodies are claimed, stretched, and ruined in gyms, living rooms, and hidden corners. No mercy. No escape. Just raw, addictive sin that leaves you sore, dripping, and desperate for more. Forbidden Flesh — where wrong feels too fucking good.

He was supposed to be a stranger. A bruised, scarred, filthy-mouthed stranger who pinned me against a bathroom wall and made me forget the boy who broke my heart 20 minutes earlier. I walked away first without his name or number, and I didn't look back. Then I found out my mom was engaged. To his dad. Rhys Maddox. Number seventeen. 6'3" of tattoos, bruised knuckles, and the kind of jaw that makes good girls do stupid things. The most dangerous player to ever step on our ice. My one-night stand. My new stepbrother. He doesn't follow rules - he breaks them. On the ice. In my bed. Against every surface in our parents' house while they eat twenty feet away. He calls me "sis" just to watch me squirm. He watches me like he already owns me. And the worst part? He does. Publicly, we're fake dating - a deal to keep my ex-bestfriend away. Privately, we're a stepbrother and stepsister who can't keep our clothes on the second we're alone. It's our biggest secret. Now the boy who I once considered my best friend suddenly wants me back. And the stepbrother who wasn't supposed to mean anything won't let me go. One wants to protect me. One wants to destroy me. And I can't tell which is which anymore. --- For readers 18+ who like their men possessive, their romances FORBIDDEN, and their chapters dripping with filthy, unapologetic spice.

Kiara Tennyson. It has always been her dream to go to the US. After her parent's death, an opportunity presents itself when she gets a chance to go there as an exchange student. She is funny, crazy, very loving, and has read too many books to know that she will find new friends, get into a fight on the first day of school with the queen bee and later teach her a lesson, and maybe find love. Reed Scott. Your typical cliche bad boy. His first love broke his heart causing him to change from loving to becoming cold. What do you think will happen when a bubbly and crazy person comes barging into his life and tries to change his cold demeanour? Why don't you read and find out? Join Kiara and be mistaken for a dog sitter, get into fights, prank the queen bee, fall on your butt in front of your new best friend, prank the whole school, take the bad boy shopping and most importantly find love abroad.

Sixteen years old spoilt brat, with weird quotes from her diary, Katherine Amelia Jones is being stripped off her position as the only child when her Dad remarries a woman with five children, who she develops this sudden hatred for. From being bullied to getting wanted and longed for, by her bully, her step brother.Things takes a sullen turn when she finally lets her guard down and gets involved in a proscriptive relationship with the eldest male of her step siblings.***A mind blowing story filled with suspense. Totally worth reading.

David meet Daniele while graduating from the seminary. He had long secretly admired Danielle, his favourite. Many women tried to entice David and made up amazing stories to keep his attention. Not because everyone likes her, but rather because she is funny, straightforward, gorgeous, and intelligent. Daniele has become everyone's favorite. Daniele has always fared extraordinarily well on tests and in class evaluations. She receives bullying from both her male and female young peers as a result of her decision to forgo makeup in favor of a comedic appearance. Daniele trained as a psychiatrist and a nun. Her superiors support her, and her friends envy her. She has been the target of plotting because she maintains her purity for the Lord while remaining untouched by human behavior and viewpoints. As a born-again Christian believer, Daniele found unforeseen challenges that led her to meet David. However, she has not yet tasted genuine love. She evolved into an emancipated lady and a modernized nun, which affected her siblings. David appeals to Daniele and she falls in love with him for these reasons. Many women claim for David but he usually denied. Daniele learns how to love David with all of her heart. David admitted that Daniele was his fate. Unexpectedly, the marriage minister offers them the quick union he had suggested. It matches David because he already has financial issues and his mother has been diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. As they are ready to go back home, they both decided to have children. They go on a secret trip deciding to have children abroad. Daniele suffered when all of her children disappeared, and David had to be following the laws. She resumes her profession as well as becomes a church worker until her children return safe and sound.  

I'm a CEO. Funny things keep happening around me after I meet a weird woman.