Funny Pick Up Lines

My husband, Theodore, was about to take his childhood sweetheart, Rosalie, around the world in a hot-air balloon when I was kidnapped by his enemy. They were about to throw me into a snake pit. I gave up asking Theodore for help and called my father-in-law instead. In my previous life, I begged Theodore to save me, even kneeling in front of the phone camera. Hence, he abandoned the hot-air balloon ride with Rosalie and rushed to negotiate with the kidnapper. Rosalie was all alone and angry. She took another hot-air balloon, but it exploded mid-way, causing her to die on the spot without even leaving behind an intact corpse. Hearing the bad news, Theodore showed a rare calm expression. He seemed to forget about Rosalie's existence and took me on a trip around the world. As we were sailing in Norwol, he suddenly pushed me into the sea. "I should never have saved you. Snake pit? Kidnapper? How could they have had the courage to push you into it? I should've never saved you if I knew it'd kill Rosalie. You should go to hell sooner!" When I opened my eyes again, I had come back to the day I was kidnapped. This time, I chose not to call for help. Humble love would only leave you bruised and battered.

A young guy keeps getting into trouble in very funny and unfortunate ways. He wrecked havocs on people too, mistakenly. He hallucinated and had great fantasies about people to brighten up his hearers. Afterwards, he came back to his mundane reality.

For the eighteenth time, Samson brought home his new lover and enjoyed their intimacy right in front of me. Knowing he was doing this to get back at me, I just quietly picked up their scattered clothes. Five years ago, Samson was nearly killed in a kidnapping. Ignoring all his desperate pleas, I broke up with him and left the country. Five years later, he became the CEO of a major corporation and used his wealth to keep me at his side as his personal assistant. Every so often, he would bring home a different woman and flaunt their affection in front of me just to humiliate me. Samson never knew that I had saved him from those kidnappers five years ago—and that I was the one who couldn't let go of him. Things went on this way until he brought Judy back. My cousin, someone I had financially supported for years. When Judy proudly stroked her belly and told me she was pregnant with Samson’s baby, I just congratulated her calmly. Then, I turned and made a phone call. “Hello, about that Medical Support Project we discussed? I’ve decided—I’m ready to join.”

After a near-death encounter, Gale, a weak and poor college student, unlocks the mysterious thing residing within him. It was a SYSTEM that can make him level up, with him growing stronger in each levels. It would give him power that will alter his destiny. A power that will catch the attention of the secret societies lurking in the shadows.

"Whose illegitimate child are you pregnant with?" My parents demand to know, looking crazed. They want to know whose child I'm carrying. I look at them and laugh. "One of the kidnappers, of course." My parents and brother are stunned, and they turn ashen. I continue softly, "Don't you guys remember? The kidnappers asked for a ransom, but you guys were only willing to save your other daughter. You wanted to teach me a lesson." Mom collapses on the couch. "That can't be. We wanted to teach you a lesson so you would stop bullying Eden. I didn't… We didn't…" I crouch before her. "You guys never expected the kidnappers to violate me, right?" I don't wait for an answer. "Do you think a few kidnappers would have morals and ethics?" She parts her lips to speak, but I don't give her the chance. "I was covered in injuries when I got home. Why didn't any of you ask me about them? "You guys took Eden away without bothering to save me. You didn't return for a day, for two days, for a month… Did you think the kidnappers would think that they could still receive the ransom?" They should be happy now—I'm about to die.

Kahit na nagbalik ang Supreme Warrior sa Middle Province upang mamuhay ng payapa, minamaliit pa rin siya ng lahat. Sa araw ng kanyang kasal, sa isang kumpas lang ng kanyang kamay, dumating ang Nine Great Gods of War at tinawag nila siya na master...

When I became pregnant, my gravely ill mother mentioned that her final wish was to witness my wedding. My boyfriend, William Jones, finally agrees to marry me after I have been asking for 99 days. Yet, on the wedding day, he never shows up, even though I was waiting in my gown at the hotel the whole day. The truth only emerges when someone found his marriage certificate that he had posted a month earlier on social media. He married his childhood sweetheart, Caroline Ashton, during that time. When my mother learns this, the shock triggers a fatal attack. She passes away despite the doctors' efforts. William sends me a message. "I'm sorry, honey. Caroline twisted her ankle, so I had to take care of her. We'll have our wedding next month, okay? I promise I'll make it up to you this time." … A month later, William prepares a lavish, grand wedding just for me. Dressed in a custom-tailored suit, he waits at the hotel. Yet, all he receives is the report from my abortion procedure. There is only one sentence on the back—"William, this is goodbye forever."

"Sabihin na lang natin na pagod na ako sa paglalaro at nais kung tigilan na ito? Gusto kong mapalapit sa iyo dahil gusto kita. Nais kong malaman kung pareho ba tayo ng gusto o mali lang ang interpretasyon ko sa kilos mo?" "Hindi, tama ka," pag-amin niya. "Pero nitong hapon lamang ay sinabi mo na ako ay isang komplikasyon na hindi mo kailangan." "Over-analyzing is second nature to me. It’s helps me more often than I care to count. Ngunit hindi sa pagkakataong ito." "Parang hindi naman ganoon iyon," masuri niyang sinabi. "Marahil ay narealized mo lamang na walang magandang patutunguhan ang pakikipagrelasyon sa akin." "I don’t care about the future. Ang tanging mahalaga lamang ay kung ano ang narito at ang ngayon. " Humakbang siya patungo sa kanya, pagkatapos ay isa pa, hanggang sa halos malanghap na niya ang halimuyak ng kanyang balat. “Ano ang masasabi mo, Lara?" he asked hoarsely. "Handa ka bang makipagsapalaran sa akin?"

My younger sister, Sophia Ashford, got pregnant before marriage. To protect her reputation before marrying into a wealthy family, she abandoned the baby at our doorstep after giving birth. Our parents, Owen and Julia Ashford, begged me to adopt the child, Tom Ashford. Seeing how pitiful he was, I agreed. Raising Tom consumed nearly all my time and energy. I lost my original job and ended up washing dishes and carrying trays, juggling three jobs on my own just to survive. When Tom grew up and was accepted into a top university, Sophia suddenly returned, crying and accusing me of stealing her child. She had successfully married into a wealthy family and lived happily with her CEO husband, Sebastian Langford, for years. Now, she wanted Tom, who had already grown into someone accomplished, back. "She was the one who stole my baby! I finally found you, my precious child! Your CEO father is rewarding you with a million dollars for getting into university. Work hard and inherit the family business in the future!" Just like that, the son I had raised for over a decade threw himself into her arms without hesitation and cut off all ties with me. The situation spiraled out of control. Our parents were ashamed of me and kicked me out of the house. To prove my innocence, I drove to the police station to retrieve surveillance footage from back then, but I died in a car accident on the way. When I opened my eyes again, I was back on the day I discovered the abandoned baby. This time, I didn’t hesitate. I called the police immediately.

During my cousin Monica Bleuthe's birthday party, my boyfriend, Grayson Chapman, who claimed to be on a business trip, suddenly appeared holding her hand and toasting the crowd. We were stunned when our eyes met. Monica hugged his arm intimately. "I forgot to introduce him to you, Ella. This is my boyfriend, Grayson. He's the CEO of the company we worked with last time." Grayson approached me and lowered his voice to say, "It's just a misunderstanding. I'm only pretending to be Monica's boyfriend." We had been in a relationship for four years, and he had never allowed our relationship to go public. He even refused to let me attend any high-end parties with him because he thought I was just an ordinary employee who was not glamorous enough to be introduced to anyone. He had no idea that my father wanted me to gain valuable work experience away from the family business. I hid my identity so that I would be better equipped to take over my family business one day. If I had married Grayson, he would have enjoyed a portion of my family's fortune. Unfortunately, that was no longer possible.