Funny Profile Pics Novels & Stories

Emilia Burke is a young and advanced college student with an eye for trouble. Ever since her last year in high school, when the only man she ever loved disappeared without a single glance, she has been an expert at evading heartbreak. And hasn't formed a meaningful connection since. Sure, she's young, funny, pretty, and too smart, but she has kept her love interests at a distance and kept everything simple. Fun. No feelings attached. But now, with as much ease as when he disappeared, Leon Maverick has returned to her life as a successful and sexy business tycoon. He's determined to win back the girl whom once had given her all for him, but there's a problem when she can't even stand the idea of him. If only she would give, but there's just something... Something about Leon. And maybe, he'll break through her barriers one last time.

“And that is the reason why I said those words. I like your fear, not because it is a normal thing. I love it because deep down you are a monster like me, schiava. You fear me on a primal level, you can feel my power and dominance, and you know you aren’t the strongest here. So you don’t fear Renzo Valentino the human, you fear the monster that lurks inside.” My life changed the night of my birthday. What started as a funny dare ended with blood and having a price on my head. I thought Renzo was the hero who saved me that night, but he was the devil who owned me forever. I, Misha Yakov, princess of the Russian mafia became Renzo Valentino's slave. He broke me, tortured me, and molded me into something new, something I hated and craved at the same time. I, Misha Yakov became my master's pet.

By day, Carlotta spins stories. By night, she serves drinks. Her life was simple. Until her good-for-nothing brother offered her as collateral to pay off a massive gambling debt to a ruthless underground casino. Now she's the reluctant fiancée of a powerful mafioso rumored to have a cruel streak... and a bedroom secret that's the talk of the criminal underworld: erectile dysfunction. Carlotta would've found it funny if it weren't her life on the line. To make things worse, fate throws in another complication: her dangerously attractive new driver-slash-bodyguard. With abs worthy of a thirst trap and a face that screams "Asgardian demigod". He's the kind of temptation a woman in her situation absolutely does not need. Just when she thinks it couldn't get more absurd, her cold, mysterious fiancé summons her to his penthouse suite with one chilling demand: He wants a taste of what's been promised. Her.

Tara’s mother and sister are both Lunar Wolves, blessed by the Moon Goddess with unique abilities. Tara seems to be an ordinary werewolf, but as she comes of age and welcomes her charismatic wolf, Trinity, her quiet life in Blue Moon is turned upside down. When she finds her mate, she’s catapulted into the spotlight, into a fairy tale with dark undercurrents she never saw coming. The threat of war looms, as her sister Talia prepares to become one of the first female Alphas, a controversial break with tradition that faces formidable resistance. Tara uncovers long buried secrets, a cryptic prophecy that unexpectedly awakens something dormant, and finds herself at the forefront as winds of change sweep through Lycan and Werewolf society. This is a story full of twists, turns, and laugh out loud funny moments. If you’re ready for a fast paced and thought provoking romantic comedy with plenty of drama and action, this novel is a fun must-read.

One night, as I was making my way to the bathroom around 3 a.m., I saw my dormmate, Yvonne, squatting in front of our door. She was rearranging all our shoes so that their tips were pointed inward. I thought it was funny, so I rearranged them to have their tips pointed outward. The next day, I found that all of them had been positioned inward again. This kept happening for a week, and I continued to scramble things up, hiding the shoes, even, or tying the shoelaces together. But they always ended up being repositioned neatly inward. I started observing my dormmate and found her mumbling to the shoes while squatting at the door. I ranted about it online, only to have my first reply send chills down my spine. [Do you also get the weird feeling that something paranormal is happening around you? You have to move out before it’s too late!]

Willow Ashford, the secretary of my mate, Alpha Garrett Blackwood, files our marking ceremony application as a mate bond dissolution for the 37th time. I finally can't hold back anymore and storm into Garrett's office, my voice trembling. "Is this what you call a top graduate from the Elite Werewolves Academy? She couldn't even figure out a simple marking ceremony application! "This is the 37th time. If you really don't have time to manage your employees, I can help you fire her." Garrett looks up from his documents, glances at the application records on my phone screen, and sighs. "I told you before, you can't have someone of Willow's caliber doing menial tasks for you. "If you have time to come here and lose your temper at me, you might as well go handle it yourself." But he doesn't know that I just discovered I'm with pup. The doctor warned me to protect the pup and avoid crowds, and the Werewolf Affairs Department is always packed and suffocating. I look at his cold profile, and something deep inside me finally shatters. In that moment, I decide to end it all. But on the day I leave the pack with our pup, leaving him behind, he goes crazy searching for me everywhere.

I woke up, and I was 28 again. I had twin heirs, and my husband was Santino, Veridia's most feared Mafia Don. He sat at the head of the Commission of the Five Families. His sharp profile was a fixture on the cover of the underworld's most exclusive magazine for several consecutive issues. Even the oldest Valerian families were lining up to offer him their daughters. All the women in Altoria envied my good fortune. But the first thing I did after waking up was pick up the divorce papers, the ink still fresh, and handed them to his childhood sweetheart, Jessy. "My lawyer will handle the divorce. The properties and assets are yours. Santino is yours. The children are yours, too." Sitting across from me, Jessy couldn't believe it, her eyes wide with shock. "Are you crazy, Alessia? Is this some kind of trick?" "How could the woman who has been Donna for six years give it all up so easily?" I lowered my gaze, my tone calm. "Since they all prefer you, I figured it was time to step aside." "Just have Santino sign it and press his signet ring into the wax seal." "Once the divorce is final, I'll leave Veridia for good." This time, I would not make the same mistake. I would never again be a Donna in name only.

Eudora Dawson has always lived in the shadow of her sister, Camellia, unseen, misunderstood, and never truly accepted in her own home. When Camellia is left paralyzed after a sudden car accident, Eudora becomes the one everyone blames. No one listened to her. Not her family. Not even Desmond Nelson, the man her sister is engaged to and the boy she once saved as a child. After Camellia’s sudden disappearance, Desmond forces Eudora into a marriage that is not built on love, but punishment. To him, she is the reason everything fell apart. To her family, she is a burden they are willing to sacrifice. And in a house where she has never truly belonged, Eudora learned to survive by enduring in silence. But silence cannot protect her forever. On the anniversary of Camellia’s disappearance, one night changes everything between Eudora and Desmond but when Camellia suddenly returns alive, Eudora is pushed out of Desmond’s life without hesitation, handed divorce papers, and forced to leave the only place she has ever known. Pregnant, alone, and with nowhere to turn, she disappears without a trace. Five years later, Eudora returns as someone unrecognisable. No longer the girl they once blamed, she is now a high profile painter with a life built far away from the ruins of her past. But the past is not finished with her. Because Desmond is searching for her. And the truth about that accident is beginning to surface.

I've worked with my wife, Naomi Prescott, for seven long years. Yet, she refuses to make my identity public in the company. Naomi claims that she's worried that the entire company might think of me as a man who relies on his partner. Believing her excuse, I stick to myself and keep a low profile all this time. But on the day my project team secures a ten-million-dollar business deal, Naomi is quick to make me give the credit to her childhood friend, Matthias Crowell. When faced with my questions, Naomi retorts in a matter-of-fact tone, "Matt is new to the company. Can't a veteran employee like you take care of him at work?" I'm furious, to say the least. "What if I say no?" Naomi throws a resignation letter at my face. "Well then, you can pack up and get lost, you pathetic loser!" I pack my belongings calmly and leave the company afterward. Three days later, Naomi's company is on the brink of bankruptcy. She sobs loudly as she begs me to return with her. I produce a business card and give it to her. "Sorry, but I prefer being the boss of my own company. It so happens that my company still needs a janitor. I suppose I can reserve that position for you, seeing as we used to be married and all."

Just after midnight on my birthday, I quietly went to the banquet hall where Luke Bennett had prepared my party. I wanted to leave the ring there, along with the project contract I had begged my father to approve for him. But the lights were still on. Bright balloons covered the floor. Luke was still tying them one by one. Someone laughed and asked if he was serious about not breaking up with me yet, even dragging Madison Carter over to help set up my birthday party. Luke put out his cigarette and said, "This one is too sensitive. Too much trouble." Madison laughed beside him. She reminded everyone of their bet: whoever dated all twelve zodiac signs first would owe the other a condition. Luke had already reached his eleventh girlfriend. "Of course I will not quit now," Luke said. "I am already looking for the next one. Just wait until I beat you." I watched his cold profile through the crack in the door, threw the ring and the contract into the trash, and turned away. Someone behind me asked what sign I was. "Scorpio," Luke answered. Luke Bennett, of all the signs you chose to mock, you picked the one that remembers.