Funny Sarcastic Quotes

His mouth moved towards my waiting nipple making my skin hot with anticipation. The feel of his lip on the tip of my nipple made it get rock hard instantly. My mind was spinning as he let it slide into his warm mouth. I moaned sharply. *** A boat cruise gone wrong… All sarcastic driven Cara McKay wanted was a pleasurable boat trip. She didn’t expect to be marooned on an island with the worst of the worst- cocky, man whore Zayn Dawson. Sexy as sin, the last place playboy Zayn wanted to be, was on an abandoned island. With only a girl who drives him crazy as his unwilling companion, Zayn doubts the fact of making it out alive sane. Not only does Cara fill him with the desire to throttle her, she also makes other things hard as well with her fiery eyes, pouty lips and curvy body. But what do two hotheaded people who are trapped together on an island do for several days? They wreck each other—in the most pleasurable way possible.

Savannah Tresscot is loud, sarcastic and not afraid to voice what she thinks about anyone. Not to mention that she can beat any sailor at a cussing competition. Plain on the outside but some serious secrets to hide, she’s totally not PA material. Yet, she gets miraculously hired by Synclair Group of Companies by a stroke of luck. Nathan Synclair is cold, collected and a hardcore businessman. Hot as on the outside but a complete mess in terms of organizing his life, he is the top industrialist in the country...in desperate need of a PA. His only option is the one who does not throw herself at him during the interview. And what better than a person he already knows, the creepy-nerd-turned-hot-graduate from his high school that he hadn't seen in years. So what happens when two completely opposite personalities meet and face their match? Will they be as aloof as they were back in school or will love give them a second chance? And can Savannah trust him with her deepest, darkest secrets, even though they might cost her everything she has worked so hard to achieve?

This is the tale of how the sexist remark, "Men are scum," was delivered to me on a scalding plate! Guess what? It all started with a birthday surprise party for my boss's fiance, but I was slapped with horror when I saw my boyfriend of two years being kissed by my boss with an engagement ring around both their fingers. Turned out I had been the side chick for two bloody years! Funny enough, I wasn't served a heart break alone, my boss had also been toying with the emotions of Cole McPherson, and together we swore to take revenge. Would I still scream, "Men are slime!" at the conclusion, or will my beliefs alter in the process of seeking revenge alongside Cole?

They say memories stored in our brain could be sometimes forgotten, but then the heart does not forget. Because our heart always remember, the heart recognizes our beloved when our brain couldn't. Years after they lost contact with each other, Zhanaia encountered Dion again on the same place where they met. And funny how destiny works, they met again just like how they first met, accidentally bumping with each other. Zhanaia's heart was filled with joy, she couldn't contain her happiness and jumped to hug Dion, not wanting to let him go again. But all the hope in her shattered when Dion pulled away from her embrace and asked her, "I'm sorry, miss, but... who are you?"

After a 12-year absence, Austin returns to the horse farm in Wyoming she has always considered her true home. But things have changed, and the farm she inherited comes with some enemies - one of them being the Carter family. Cortland Carter now handles his family's affairs and is determined to get the water rights back from his neighbor, who won them from his grandfather in a poker game. Fate has a funny way of bringing people together, and when Austin saves Cortland's niece, the two finally meet. Despite the feud between their families, they both feel a mutual attraction that cannot be denied. But with their families at odds, is there any hope for a future together? "Coming Home" is a heartwarming tale of love and betrayal.

Gwen is a rogue who hates pack wolves. After her parents were brutally murdered by their pack for a crime they did not commit, Gwen has had nothing but hatred in her heart. On a night hunt, Gwen encounters the legendary rogue killer, Alpha Liam. A man who hates rogues with every fibre of his being. However, the moon goddess likes to play funny games. Liam and Gwen are mates. But this bond does not stop their hatred for each other. Liam takes her back to his pack, unable to leave her but hateful of her existence. He offers Gwen a deal. They would be mated for as long as it took for her to produce an heir. The rogue and alpha are dancing on the thin line between lust, love and hate. Can they pretend for long?

A dangerous memory is worth keeping. Velgrave Academy is no ordinary school—it's a haven for the Bloodborn, gifted students with abilities most people could never imagine. But for Ophelia Wolfe, power isn’t just a gift; it’s a weapon—and her most guarded secret. Cold, composed, and unapologetically untouchable, Ophelia has no time for drama, distractions, or the infuriatingly charming Carl Maddox. He's reckless, sarcastic, and knows exactly how to push her buttons. He also remembers the one thing she’d hoped was buried: a secret moment shared one summer night. One they both swore to forget. Now, fate keeps throwing them together—class projects, whispered rumors, a growing mystery unraveling inside the academy. As tension turns into undeniable attraction, and playful rivalry turns into something far deeper, Ophelia and Carl are forced to confront what they’ve been running from: each other. But in a school where memories can be stolen and secrets are never safe, love could be the most dangerous risk of all. Because some secrets don’t just stay hidden… They haunt. They burn. And the most dangerous ones? They change everything.

Camila Brinx, a 19 year old heiress, living in the city of Los Angeles. She was the daughter of a wealthy business owner. Starting a new contract for business, Camila's father arranged for her to get married to billionaire bachelor Elijah Camorra, a 21 year old business man who follows in his father's footsteps and did everything his father said. Elijah Camorra was a charming young man, who has never looked at love as he did before. Growing up in the same wealthy environment, unfortunately Camila and Elijah had never spoken to each other but now they had to act as if they were in love to seal the deal for their father's contract Camila and Elijah are thrown into a dangerous game, both playing each other with witty words and sarcastic phrases. Both realizing that they were never enemies, now the two used their charm on the other for fun, while not noticing how hard they were both falling for the other. Life decisions had to be made together, since they were now married, Elijah falling for the girl he had admired for years and Camila falling for the man she thought was just like every other wealthy business man.

A security guard caught a snake in our apartment complex and delivered it straight to my door. I was just about to scream when floating comments cut in. [The male lead got dumped and turned back into his real form just to spy on his girlfriend, and he actually got caught? This is funny as hell!] [He got dumped, and his girlfriend hates him. He's probably gonna cry himself to sleep!] [Aww, poor little snake can't curl up on his girlfriend tonight.] The big black snake looked pitiful in the guard's hands. It secretly sized me up with its slit pupils. I tried holding out my hand, and the black snake stared in disbelief. Two seconds later, it obediently rubbed its head against my fingers.

Until recently, Carolina Lane has lived a normal life, but when she moves to this town, things change. Having Kayler Brown, the sexiest and most respected boy in school, as a neighbor is not funny at all. While Caroline is trying hard to make this bossy yet meddling boy stay out of her business, she receives death warnings: Attention, Carolina. The forest will be your new enemy. Do not approach Kayler, or otherwise, your death will be even more painful than I had planned. Who sent this letter? What is Kayler hiding behind? What's the secret of this town? Caroline desperately wants to figure out the truth. However, Kayler won’t answer the questions. He just takes her hand and gazes at her. “You are mine.” He said.