Funny Yo Mama Jokes

Sepuluh tahun lalu, demi menyelamatkan Marcus, aku kehilangan penglihatanku. Sepuluh tahun kemudian, Marcus malah menempatkan wanita simpanannya di vila yang sama denganku. Setiap malam, dia berpura-pura menghiburku hingga tertidur di paruh malam pertama, lalu menghabiskan paruh malam berikutnya bersama wanita itu. Bahkan anakku diam-diam memanggil wanita itu "Mama". Mereka tidak tahu, aku sudah mendapatkan kembali penglihatanku dan sedang merencanakan untuk meninggalkan mereka.

The story of 'EVERY WOMAN CANNOT BE PRETTY' is a message to millions of women around the world who feel inferior due to their average looks that ‘ Beauty is not in the face alone.’ The protagonist in this story, Sarah Liam suffers from PCOS ( Polycystic Ovary Syndrome) with side effects of being obese, acne prone and having more than normal hair growth on face and body. To top it she is short in height and has a prominent mole on her chin. In all, she is not what one can call “pretty”. Her husband wants to use her as a sex toy, her best friend betrays her trust by sleeping with her husband. Faced with treachery by loved ones, shunned by many, at the brunt of the unkindest of jokes, the story shows how Sarah manages to rise like a Phoenix, hold her head high and eke revenge on the people who have cheated her, solely with the strength of her talent and grit. But with her flawed appearance, will she ever find true love? Can she ever aspire to marry a handsome man or will she have to settle for someone similarly flawed? Read on..

Constant head splitting headaches, random joint pains,. dizziness and lightheadedness. it was symptoms I know just too well. The blue rose illness. The vile disease that robbed me of my mother. And now I think it's coming for my life too. My name is Ivy and I have the blue rose illness. Funny right? I can't believe I have less than thirty days to live. ************ Prince Emiliano "You are sick? Since when?" "I am sorry." "Keep that for later—I will never give you the permission to leave me. You can never leave me. Do you understand Ivy? Don't you dare."

Ese día, mis padres y mi hermana, que estaban trabajando en el extranjero, de repente me dijeron que yo era un rico de segunda generación con billones de dólares en riqueza.Gerald Crawford: ¿Soy un rico de segunda generación?

Mi hermana gemela, Elena, y yo fuimos emparejadas con los gemelos Alfa. Solo el primer cachorro que naciera entre nosotras sería el heredero Alfa de la manada. Mi hermana quedó embarazada un mes antes que yo, y se suponía que ella daría a luz al heredero primero. Pero yo entré en labor de parto un mes antes, de forma prematura. Pero cuando estaba a punto de dar a luz, decidí quedarme en una habitación llena de pociones especiales que suprimían las contracciones. Porque, en mi vida anterior, mi pareja Alfa, Marcos, me había sumergido en agua mezclada con acónito para retrasar el parto. Al final, mi cachorro y yo morimos allí. La agonía fue insoportable. Sollozaba y suplicaba, rogándole que me explicara por qué me hacía eso. Pero él ignoró mis gritos por completo. Lo único que le importaba era apresurar a Elena hasta la guarida de partos de la manada. —Mi hermano Gabriel murió salvando mi vida —me gruñó—. La única forma de honrar esa deuda de sangre es asegurarnos de que su hijo sea el heredero de la manada. Puedes resentir a Elena todo lo que quieras cualquier otro día, pero hoy no. Solo aguanta un poco más. —Es una poción especial. Vas a estar sana y salva. ¡Confía en mí! ¿Sana y salva? Pasé un día y una noche enteros sufriendo en aquel sótano. Mi hijo se asfixiaba en mi vientre mientras el veneno de acónito me consumía lentamente. Cuando abrí los ojos de nuevo, había regresado al día de mi parto. Esta vez, tengo que salvarme a mí misma.

Durante cinco años, lo apoyé en silencio, ayudando a mi novio a pasar de ser un simple asistente legal a socio en Ponce & Beltrán Abogados. En la ceremonia anual de premios del despacho, yo estaba emocionada, lista para celebrar con él y darle una sorpresa. Pero entonces lo vi subir al escenario con una compañera. Estaban uno al lado del otro, con una cercanía que no dejaba lugar a dudas. —Rodrigo está donde está, gracias a mí, gracias a que estuve detrás de él planeando cada paso. Tania presumió, con una sonrisa victoriosa. Él sonrió y le dio la razón. —Es cierto. Sin Tania, yo no estaría hoy aquí. La sala estalló en una ovación y todos los presentes se apresuraron a felicitarlos. Yo, de pie entre la multitud, sentí que el suelo se abría bajo mis pies. Salí del salón y le marqué a mi asistente. —Retírale todo el apoyo de nuestros contactos a Rodrigo y cancela cualquier colaboración que tengamos. También vamos a dejar de usar influencias para apoyarlo en ese caso irregular que tomó. Que asuma las consecuencias solo.

Have you ever pain so raw it feels like your hear is being dragged out of your heart? The type that breaks into pieces you could never find because they are lost to the wind of scorn and shame. Cassandra carries her pain like a weight on her shoulder everyday despite her smiles and jokes, too young to remember what it felt like to have parents before she lost hers to an accident her grandparents do not like talking about she is trying to find the little good life has in store for her. But she is given a brutal awakening when the one person she thought would bring her much needed happiness tosses her aside. So Cassandra runs away from it all, she runs far enough to never feel the despair looming behind her. And she runs into the arms of Ray, handsome, cocky, but caring, considerate, and loving. Cassandra is about to find out love works without the mate ties and build bonds with the most unlikely people. Cassandra is about to find the love acceptance she always yearned for in the most unlikely place.

Letche naman oh! Kung hindi ko lang talaga kailangan ng perang pang piyansa kay Itay hinding hindi ako sasapi sa grupo ni Buknoy. At malay ko bang ang target namin ay isa pa lang bigatin na ubod ng gwapo, yaman, yabang, at saksakan ng pagkababaero bukod dun napaka-daldal niya at ang bastos pa ng bunganga. Walang iba kundi si Sebastian Cain Guevarra. Ang lalaking mas magulo pa sa buhok mo sa private part. Paano ba naman—"I'll give you two option, Miss. Pumili ka, kulong o magiging alipin ko?" seryoso ngunit nakangising tanong niya. Humakbang siya papalapit at inilapit ang mukha sa aking tenga saka bumulong. "Choose wisely cutie..." sabay kindat niya. ©CrystalineG

Secretary of a Mafia (Vasileios #1) Agasher Dame Reyes only wanted a decent job to stand on her own feet. But her interview as Sandro Salvador’s secretary was far from ordinary, it was a test of pride, strength, and determination. Insulted yet unshaken, she proved herself in front of an intimidating recruiter and unexpectedly landed the position no one dared to take. Sandro Salvador is a man known for his ruthless discipline and merciless standards. To work under him means sleepless nights, unending pressure, and surviving a world where power rules over everything. With a salary too tempting to refuse, Agasher steps into a life that is far more complicated than she ever imagined. But being Sandro’s secretary is not just about schedules and documents. It’s about standing her ground, facing hidden dangers, and keeping her identity intact in a world full of secrets. What began as a simple job soon pulls her into a deeper battle between survival and ambition. Caught between her dignity and her growing entanglement with Sandro, Agasher must decide; will this opportunity lead her to the independence she longs for, or will it trap her in a world that could break her completely?

Sam spent her life completely oblivious to the supernatural, that is until she meets her new boss, Caleb. Her reality came crashing down, and now she has not only a werewolf, but an Alpha of a nearby pack staking his claim. Now being pulled into his world, she must decide if she can handle all the things that go bump in the night. Caleb was one of the strongest of his kind, yet he is pulled toward a female that the moon goddess chose for him. No matter how much he tries to resist, he soon realises that he needs her as much as she needs him.