Hilarious Jokes For Adults Clean

Being a college freshman is an exciting time, especially for Cora Worthington. With no college major declared, Cora finds her heart on the tailwinds of a bad breakup with high school ex, Spencer. As the fall semester begins, an unlikely meeting leads Cora to have feelings for her world history professor, Blake Oakley. When Blake reveals his hidden past to Cora her heart gets entangled with his. Can Cora secretly date a college professor and not get caught or will their relationship be her downfall?

“Fuck—say my name when I’m inside you,” Drake’s voice was a dark growl against my ear, his hand pinning mine above the headboard. “Drake… oh God, harder—” I cried, my body arching into his relentless thrusts. “Not just Drake. Say what I am to you.” “My ex’s father,” I gasped, shame and desire tangling on my tongue. “That’s right, sweetheart. And now you’re mine.” It was supposed to be a reckless mistake. A reckless sex with a stranger after catching my boyfriend screwing my best friend. But the stranger wasn’t a stranger at all. He was Drake Humphrey. My ex-boyfriend’s father. Older. Filthy rich. Ruthlessly dominant. The man I should have run from. Instead, I let him own me. In his penthouse, on his desk, in his car. I let him ruin me with every touch. But what started as lust has become obsession. Drake doesn’t just want my body. He wants my heart. He wants me under his name, his control, his power. And when our secret erupts, the world around us catches fire. My ex wants revenge. His mother wants blood. His father wants me. And I can’t decide if I’ve been destroyed… or if I’ve finally come alive.

Elena: "He comes to me in my dreams and reaches out to my deepest soul. He touches me in a way that sets me on fire. I belong to him. I exist for him. My life is meaningless without him." Cameroon: "My soul is ablaze anytime she is far from me. She alone can quench this fire burning inside me. I may be a tech billionaire but my riches do not come close to satisfying me the way she does. I want her, with every bone in my body." Elena and Cameroon. Lovers. Soulmates. Different timelines. Elena has superpowers, She can swap bodies and take over anyone's life. She lives in the year 2020. Cameroon is a tech billionaire, framed for murder and about to be killed. He lives in the year 2013. Elena finds a way to save him and to live a life of pure bliss only he could give her. And what happens when they meet? Fireworks go off! Their love is pure, hot, and passionate. So how does Elena get to be reborn? To be in love across timelines? Please read to find out.

Susie Chance always claimed to value fairness above all else. Because of that, she ordered a specially designed chip implanted into my body. Whenever her childhood sweetheart suffered bouts of stomach cancer, all his suffering would be transferred onto me. On the day he underwent tumor-removal surgery, I collapsed in agony in the hospital corridor. Meanwhile, Susie gently comforted him in the ward. “So? It didn’t hurt at all, right?” Later, she said she wanted to hold a wedding with her childhood sweetheart, so he could experience being a groom as well. “Even though the one marrying me is Mark, the one I’ll register with in the future will still be you. I told you… I’ve always treated you both equally.” I said nothing, simply returning the wedding ring she had once placed in my hands. However, when the wedding march finally began to play, I boarded a one-way flight far away.

Their contract had expired a week ago and considering the fact that Miller's long term crush, Alexia was back from her six months trip, Miller decides to bring her back into the pack. Hurt and betrayed, Summer tries to reject him knowing she'd rather die than become his breeder, “I, Summer Dubios, reject…” Miller's cold voice cut her short instantly, “Summer! Are you out of your mind? You have no right to reject your mate! I’m not done with you yet. I alone have the right to reject you as my mate. Not until I am satisfied with the pleasure you bring, you're still my mate and you'll remain here till I have no use for you and that's final!”

When struggling waitress Elira Cruz was forced into entering a contract marriage with cold, ruthless billionaire Caelan Ferrer, she thought she was sealing just another business deal: one year, no emotions, no strings. But behind that icy stare lay hurtful memories Elira unknowingly played a part in. Snowed in by her messy kindness, the man who swore never to love again slowly began to thaw. Secrets begin to unfold underneath. A hidden link ties them much closer than either one would have imagined. Will their fake marriage survive the truth...or will love become the price of revenge?

In my parents' hearts, there was always a "perfect son" who died too soon. I was just his flawed substitute, while my younger brother was their new hope. They pretended to be poor for 20 years, secretly funneling all their resources to him. While I was in the final stages of stomach cancer, writhing in pain, they were spending millions of dollars to build him a state-of-the-art study room. When the doctor told me to notify my family about hospital bills, I felt helpless, thinking they were just ordinary, broke workers. When my mom finally showed up at the hospital, she grabbed my hand, not out of concern. "Neville is under so much stress with his college entrance exams. Can you not die right now? He can't take it." My dad stood by, wearing a stern expression. "David was way more sensible than you."

My girlfriend keeps saying that she comes from a poor family, but she gives her childhood sweetheart a yacht on our anniversary. I text her to ask about this, but all she does is berate me. "Who do you think you are? How dare you stick your nose into my business! I'll give anyone whatever I want. My money, my call. Get lost!" Unbeknownst to her, I'm covered in blood on the other end of the line.

In the third year of our marriage, my wife’s ex-boyfriend of eight years suddenly posted a picture on social media showing off a multi-million-dollar wedding house. His caption read: “Wow, got myself a huge villa, I’m the master of charming women!” I stared in shock at the picture, which showed my wife swiping her card at a sales office, and left a single comment: "?" A second later, my wife called to scold me. “I was just fulfilling a promise I made to him back when we were dating, buying him a house. Why are you getting mad at him?” “What? Are you really going to be so vicious as to force me to break my word?” That evening, her ex showed off another lavish post, this time flaunting a renovation bill worth hundreds of thousands. I knew it was a gift from my wife to please him. But by then, I no longer cared.

"Rule 1! I don't want to see your filthy hands on my kids, make sure you are clean before touching them." "Rule Two! I don't want you close to me. People like you are nothing but gold diggers." Those were the rules Lucas Maxwell, the renowned billionaire gave to Scarlett Barnes before she was finally accepted into the big mansion as a nanny. She had long dreamed of a high-paying job to foot her bills, and she finally got one. Without considering the terror she would face from Lucas, being the father of the kids she bonded with. Scarlett thought it was the beginning of a new life, without realizing it was another phase of woes for her. Fortunately, an opportunity came and she got into a contract marriage with Lucas, she gradually falls in love with him, but then secrets are revealed. Would she be able to stick with Lucas even after discovering his secrets? What happens when she herself discovers her true identity?