Mommy Milker Jokes

When down-on-her-luck Rennie Brooks accepts a job as a live-in nanny for the daughter of cold, enigmatic billionaire Shawn Wolfe, she believes it’s just another job—and another clingy child—until the little girl looks up at her with wide, innocent eyes and calls her “Mommy”… then begins mirroring her every habit. The connection is instant. The tension between her and Shawn, undeniable. Because Shawn isn’t just her new boss—he’s the man from her one unforgettable night eight years ago, the stranger who vanished before dawn, leaving behind nothing but memories and heartbreak. Rennie swore she’d never fall for him again. But under the same roof, every stolen glance and forbidden touch reignites the desire she thought she’d buried for good. Her fragile new beginning shatters when Shawn’s glamorous ex-wife suddenly returns, demanding custody of the little girl Rennie has come to love as her own. Just as she prepares to walk away, a devastating secret surfaces— Diane isn’t Shawn’s daughter. She’s Rennie’s. Now Rennie must fight for the child she never knew was hers and face the hardest choice of her life: between the man who broke her heart and the one who might finally mend it.

After crashing her stepfather's car, Jo Fisher faces a five-year sentence under the strict oversight of a high-level mafia vampire guardian. **WARNING: INCLUDES DARK SCENES SOME MAY FIND DISTURBING** In this new world order, large vampire families once thought to be the mafia in the 20th and 21st centuries, now preside over all legal matters and wield global authority after making their true natures known to the world. Jo's sentence is to be served as a contracted slave at Camilla Academy, a prestigious institution established by the more refined families. Here, vampires at a young age learn to coexist with their human counterparts and maintain control. All while ensuring their human charges become compliant and dependable sources of sustenance. Jo's options are limited. She must either adopt the role of a slave/pet to a vampire master or become the more cherished ward of a Daddy (or Mommy) vampire, expected to regress into an almost adolescent state of obedience. Dane, an ancient vampire prince underboss from the original family, is drawn to Jo's vibrant spirit and tendency to push boundaries. Captivated by her fiery demeanor and stubborn temperament, he is determined to have her as his mate rather than a subordinate. Can he temper Jo's vivacious spirit just enough for them to navigate the academy's demands without extinguishing the very fire that draws him to her?

Everyone thought Isabelle Monroe was just a washed-up actress clinging to a loveless marriage. Her husband cheated. Her own son called the other woman “Mommy.” Still, she smiled through it all, desperately trying to fix her perfect family. Until the day both her husband and son told her she was a nuisance and they didn’t want her anymore. Thrown out of her own home, humiliated and replaced, Isabelle walks away with nothing but her pride. But just when the world erased her name, he appeared. Riven Thorne, a powerful, enigmatic and far too familiar man offers her comfort, a contract, and a cold little girl who won’t speak to anyone but her. He gives Isabelle another chance. Not just at motherhood... but at revenge, fame, and love. Now she’s back on screen, headlines are begging for her name, and the same people who mocked her are clawing to be on her side. She tells herself it’s all pretend… The husband. The marriage. But then… Her new daughter clings to her hand. Her son cries and calls her “Mommy” again. And her fake husband starts feeling all too real. Isabelle starts to wonder— Is this fate’s way of rewriting her story?

My fated mate, Alpha Cullen, fell for the lies of his first love, Donna, and planned to kill me. But in a twist of fate, we were ambushed by rogues and died together. But with his last breath, he whispered another woman's name: Donna. In that moment, I knew the truth—it had always been her, his real love. When the Moon Goddess gave me a second chance, I was reborn on the day I first met him. One look at the hatred in his eyes, and I knew: he had been reborn, too. So before he could speak, I rejected him in front of the entire pack. Years later, when we met again, he sneered that I was nothing more than a pathetic rogue who tinkered with flowers. But he didn't know I had found a new mate: Orton, the Alpha of Alphas. It wasn't until our son ran to me, wrapping his little arms around my leg and crying, "Mommy!" that Cullen's façade finally shattered. He grabbed my arm, his voice cracking as he begged, "This can't be happening! I'm your fated mate! You still love me… right, Juliet?"

My wife, Sarah, died unexpectedly. My in-laws made an absurd request. "Why not have Stella play both roles? After all, Luke can't be without a mother." My brother-in-law, Greg, yelled at me, calling me shameless, and stormed out in anger. I looked at my sister-in-law, Stella, who looked exactly like my late wife. I could hardly conceal my grief. I was about to urge them to abandon their ridiculous idea, when I accidentally overheard a conversation between her and her parents. "It was Stella who died, so why did you lie and claim it was you?" Sarah sighed. "I love Greg. I staged my death so I could be with him legitimately. As for asking me to play both roles, don't even bring it up again. As for Michael, I have already given him a child and a respectable marriage. I owe him nothing." Turning around, I saw Luke with reddened eyes, asking me softly, "Daddy, does that mean that Mommy no longer wants us?" I bent down and pulled him into my arms, forcing myself to soothe him. "Your Aunt Stella wants to protect the person that she loves. We shouldn't bother her. It's time for us to prepare a new life."

The year my family goes bankrupt, I cling to Ewan Rivera for one last night. When I wake up, I throw my final bit of money at him. "You can go cozy up to some other sugar mommy now. You don't need to degrade yourself by serving an ugly woman like me." I'm kicked out by the people liquidating our assets, and everyone points and laughs at the birthmark on my face. Meanwhile, Ewan's friends are busy celebrating his fresh start. "With a face like yours, tons of wealthy, gorgeous women are lining up for you. Why torture yourself with that ugly chick?" "Now that she's bankrupt, she won't cling to you anymore, right?" Five years later, Ewan has gone from being a broke campus heartthrob to a rising star in business. In the interview room, he flips through my application and pauses on my photo. He asks coolly, "You're 28? You already have a child?" I meet his probing gaze and introduce myself. "Yes. I'm Ingrid Landeau. I'm married with a daughter." I've changed my name and removed the large birthmark on my face. Ewan can't recognize me anymore.

"Three years into our marriage, during which we couldn't conceive a child, my relationship with my husband, Wilhelm, has gone down the drain. However, when I finally had a child, I was hesitant to share the news with him, since he had been treating me less and less like his wife." *Kathryn Reinhardts was married to Wilhelm Reinhardts, one of the wealthiest businessmen in the country. She had become a housewife, enduring the cold violence from her husband and mother-in-law for three long years. After witnessing her husband's infidelity with his college friend, she made the difficult decision to leave him. Eight months later, she gave birth to a pair of twins, but the nurse delivered heartbreaking news: her baby son hadn't survived. Five years later, Kathryn completed her education and returned to her home country with her little daughter. On her first day back, a young boy hugged her leg and called her "Mommy." "Mommy, I finally found you!!" he exclaimed. Kathryn was taken aback—the boy had the same eye color as her. What's more, he was the only son of her ex-husband. The unexpected reunion opened a new chapter in Kathryn's life.

Jessiah is a make-up artist aspiring to break into the modeling and beauty industry. She moves to LA when she lands a job at one of the biggest production companies in Hollywood. On her first week on the job, she meets Jenson Ross, a big-deal actor with a murky past and a dark secret only a privileged few know about. × Genres: Romance, Werewolf, Crime EXCERPT [BOOK I of CALI ALPHAS ] _ _ _ "Dollface," he murmured with a little smirk. He snickered and caressed the back of her head, pulling her closer to his chest. "You're like an antidepressant, in human form." Her breath caught.  Her heart sped up when his hug tightened. His warm face pressed onto her neck, his strong hands lightly squeezing her hips. Moments like this only worsened her attraction to him.  The flirty jokes, the easy conversations, the small smiles, his furtive glances, and his unusually sweet gestures lately... She was in deep trouble. Was he kissing her neck?  Shit. He was no longer thinking straight.  About this. About her. About the consequences. He drew her closer when she tried to pull away. As if he didn't want her out of his sight. While his beard scraped her skin, his thighs touched hers. Her throat ached as he stared into her eyes. "Dammit," he sighed, his thumb tracing the curve of her neck, his touch both gentle and eager.  "Why are you so f-cking beautiful?"  "Joss, I need to g—" "Why now?" he murmured, stroking her cheek. He wasn't acting drunk or playing with her.  Not like this. He wouldn't. Not with her real feelings barely held together by some unspoken truths. Otherwise he wouldn't dare let it get this far.  But why wouldn't he let go? "Just stay. Please. Stay here with me." _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Fifth only main goal is to find a relationship through thick and thin. But what happened is opposite from the one great love story of his parents. Every failed relationship end up with a conclusion of being back to strangers, for him to realized to change his main goal instead, is to be more practical despite of the love that he's willing to give. But it was not about true love what he needs, instead is to have a child that he is going to cherish forever. When he met Rosette, he was matured enough to handle the situation. He was willing to let find the destiny of their relationship, what matters to him is to have a child from Rosette. The situation has become out of the blue when Eunice was out of control to mess their relationship. Without any notice that everything is beyond her control after the accident that happened to Fifth. All through the years, Rosette has tend to believe that she is the only one who was fighting for their relationship. The reason why she has to leave the past and forget Fifth. But, things may be different when Fifth has accidentally met his son, Seven, aside from holding back the memories with Rosette. Perhaps, without any excuses, and one thing is for sure, that despite of everything, he's still madly in love with Rosette. Will their love story could end up from marriage? But what if their son, has prepared an intimate proposal saying, “Daddy, marry my mommy!”

I still have a week before my due date when a truck suddenly hits me, sending me flying several feet and leaving me bleeding profusely on the ground. As I lose consciousness, I call my husband, Wallace Brown, begging him to rush over and save our unborn child, only for him to reply coldly, "It's Beth's 18th birthday party today, Meryl. You can't seriously be pulling one of your stunts on a day like this, can you?" In the next instant, I hear my son, Daniel Brown, exclaiming, "You're always using the baby to threaten us, Mommy! I really hate it when you do that!" Wallace stresses the importance of Beth's birthday party again, demands that I attend immediately, and then hangs up on me. With a pool of blood spreading beneath me, I close my eyes, overcome by despair. When I open my eyes again, I am met by the sight of a death certificate. The doctor delivers a crushing pronouncement. "I'm sorry, but if you had gotten here sooner, we might have been able to save the baby's life…" I look at the death certificate, feeling as though my heart died with my baby. I finally decide to leave this family, yet now they're the ones begging me to stay.