Old Tagalog Jokes

Malaya will never live up to her name. Hindi siya kailanman naging malaya at hindi magiging. Namumuhay siyang tila daga na nagtatago sa malulupit na mga pusa. Sa kagustuhang matakasan ang kinalakhang buhay at mahanap ang kalayaan, napadpad si Malaya sa isang malayong probinsya. Sa kanyang pagtakas, nasumpumgan niya si Thorin Fuentebella— ang binatang kumupkop sa kaniya. Sa pagtira niya sa mansyon nito, napalapit at minahal niya ang lalaki— na walang kaalam-alam sa tunay niyang pagkatao. Subalit nang dumating ang pagkakataon na kinailangan niyang aminin ang lahat—ang tunay niyang pagkatao at dahilan ng kanyang pagtakas ay hindi niya inaasahang ang binata pa pala ang magtutulak sa kanyang balikan ang nakaraan na ayaw na niyang maranasan...

Ang kuwentong ito ay hindi angKop sa mga batang mambabasa.*** Since childhood, Astin Kier Hernandez has loved Laura Miller. But it was a one-sided love. Laura never had feelings for him. Still, he didn’t give up; he guarded her closely all through college. Out of gratitude to his family, Laura agreed when he proposed in front of her parents. He knew she wouldn’t refuse because of gratitude to their family. He thought he was the happiest man that day. He was wrong. Laura admitted she already had a boyfriend, Gael. But Astin didn’t allow the wedding plans to be canceled. Learning this, he rushed to set the wedding date. On their wedding day, Laura didn’t show up, and that was his first heartbreak. One-sided love is torture. For months, he disappeared from everyone’s radar, leaving behind his comfortable life. To forget, he joined the military, spending four years in training. After that, his team was deployed abroad on their first mission, which lasted longer than expected. Eight years is a long time, so he returned to the Philippines. He and Laura crossed paths once again. But he was no longer the Astin who was hopelessly in love with her. How many women had he left heartbroken whenever he was reassigned to a different place? But how could he now avoid the woman who did nothing but apologise and try to win him over every day? And how long could she endure his cold treatment?

Stella means, "The star of the whole world." Cassiopeia Stella has everything she wants. Money, beauty, fame, and intelligence. She's the brightest star of her family, she's the lucky charm of her family. Everyone wants her, everyone admired her personality, everyone loves her. Everyone wants to be her. But there's one thing that everyone doesn't know. She's the secret of the billionaire. She's the billionaire's secret.

Inosente sa unang tingin tila di makabasag pinggan ang awra ni Dorothy Sebastian. Pero kapag ito ay umpisa ng magsalita ikaw ay mauubosan ng dahilan, palusot, oh anong pigil mo wala ring kwenta. Parang bata, wala sa tamang pag-iisip, baliw, kulang sa pagmamahal, abnormal, at higit sa lahat' manyak. Yan ang laging bansag sa kanya dahil kung anong laman ng utak n'ya. Ay gagawin at gagawin n'ya ang gusto n'ya. Paano mo ba maiiwasan ang ganitong babae? Lalo na kung ikaw ay nagustohan at natipuhan n'ya? Kahit anong pigil mo para hindi kalang magkakasala. Paano kung s'ya na mismo ang gumagawa ng paraan. Kaya mo pa kayang umayaw kung ang ng gagahasa sayo' ay isang inosenteng manyak? Hanggang saan ba ang pagpipigil ni Darwin sa sarili' para hindi lang magkasala sa kanyang misyon. Kung gayong unti-unti na s'yang nakaramdam ng pag-ibig kay Dorothy.

Dewi Revia Ananta. Required to return to the head office after previously becoming the head of a subsidiary outside Java. This is because of the special task of the central leadership to accompany the new leadership, after the transfer of power in the company. Ironically, it turns out that the new head of the company, a handsome, singular and humble man, is a man that Revia really doesn't want to see again, and even hates him very much. Yunan Ardian Dewangga. Even though they had attended the same high school. However, there was an unfinished story between the two of them. In order to avoid Yunan, Revia tries to change herself into someone who is far from her true personality. Until they create friction when they meet.

The forest within the quiet village of Gashea is a dangerous place. Within the trees lies something dark, cursed, and wicked. For centuries, a demon with malevolent power terrorizes the villagers of the small valley home. He had brought droughts, disease, and famine. To ensure that he will keep his powers at bay, the village of Gashea offers a bride to the demon every night. And by dawn, without fail, they would see the corpse of the offered brides floating along their bright, shining river. With the next choosing fast approaching, the head villagers made a shocking decision. They had chosen Fyn. A man. When Fyn starts to slowly fall in love with the demon within the forest, secrets of the past unravel. The truth makes them wonder whether it’s the right monster Gashea fears.

Isang malusog na sperm. Ito lang ang kailangan ni Virgou sa lalaking nakitaan niya ng katangian para maging ama ng kanyang anak. Si Zerriko Gray. Estudyante sa paaralang itinayo ng kanyang yumaong ina. Hindi siya nagdalawang-isip na alukin ang binata at nagtagumpay na mapapayag ito. Ngunit, hindi pera ang hiniling kapalit kundi ang kanyang puso. Paano niya ibibigay ang hinihingi nitong kabayaran kung ang puso niya ay tumitibok hindi sa lalaki kung hindi sa katulad niya ng kasarian? Magagawa ba nitong basagin ang baluti niya at ilabas ang marupok niyang katauhan? *** Para kay Zek, si Virgou ay isang bituin. Isang bituin na mahirap abutin ngunit kusang kumalas sa daan nito at nahulog sa kanyang kandungan. He knew her depths and darkness. Her light, because she was like a transparent glass. She is smooth and hard. Beautiful and clear. Can resist the heat. Endured pressure and breakage. But more than a mere glass, she is his queen. Always and forever. His glass queen.

Everyone wants to be me. Who wouldn't? I've got the looks, sexy body, money and Andrew Maru Ottave, my husband. Pero kung malalaman lang siguro nila kung sino at ano talaga ang nangyayari sa buhay ko, hindi ko alam kung gugustuhin pa nilang maging ako. Simula pagkabata ay alam ko na ang aking magiging kapalaran. Wala akong karapatan na mamili kung sino ang gusto kong makasama habambuhay. Dahil sa huli ang mga magulang ko pa rin ang magdedesisyon kung sino ang aking mapapangasawa. It's not a new thing with the elite. My parents are also a product of an arranged marriage. They marry for business and had a child for business. And just like my mom, I will also be a Business Wife.

Penelope Brielle Acosta is a bride-to-be however she had a one night stand with a man who isn't her future husband-to-be.Natagpuan niya ang sarili na walang saplot nang umagang magising at nang malingunan sa tabi niya ang lalaking inakalang pakakasalan ay ganoon na lamang ang gulat niya ng hindi iyon ang lalaking dapat niyang pangakuan ng kanyang vows. She shared a drunken night to a stranger!She was fully convinced that she was with her man last night. What happened to her bachelorette party and how did she end up with a stranger in her bed? And why did she end up marrying that stranger who took her that night?

Quinlee Velez has a wealthy but miserable life, despite of that she has a boy bestfriend who is one call away in times of distress and trouble. She always has things planned out to pursue and reach her dreams until one day she meets a guy named Zik, with a contract that ties the knot and who shatters her plans. Felt she was doomed to a life of extreme unhappiness. Marriage is normally one’s happily ever after in the movies but for them it’s a complete opposite of what other’s expect. Are they going to survive? Or ends in break-up and walk in separate ways? All right, let’s see!