Overactive Imagination

My wife, Charlene Weber, has taken me to the Scumbag Court. If I'm found guilty, all my assets will be taken from me, and I'll face 10 years of imprisonment. Charlene, on the other hand, will get to marry her ideal man—Joel Quinlan—as she wishes. If I'm acquitted of all charges, Charlene will be made to divorce me without alimony. She'll also be cursed with bad luck and disfigured so badly she'll be the ugliest woman in the world. Conversely, I'll be given 10 million dollars in reparations and gain a lifetime's worth of good luck. Everyone is advising me to admit to my mistakes, but only because Charlene has always been a virtuous, devoted wife in their eyes. They think that there must surely be some complicated grievances between us at the moment. However, they are unaware that I've been reborn. This time, I'm going to tear off Charlene's mask of hypocrisy.

It was my third day working as an NPC cashier in a horror game when the supermarket got completely wrecked by players. They stormed in, smashing shelves, looting everything, setting fires, feeling real proud of themselves. "Told you the shopkeeper here was useless. Absolutely trash in all combat stats," one said. "Grab whatever you want. Once we're done, we'll just kill the owner," another chimed in. My mouth was gagged. I shook my head in terror. One of the players sneered. "Begging? That won't save you." No! That was not what I was trying to say! I was trying to tell them that today was the NPC internal shopping day. Three minutes from now, every single dungeon boss in the entire game would be rushing here to shop.

Leo Parker, my fiance, shoved me out the door with his own hands. He used me as bait to buy time for himself and my best friend, Jessica Thorne, to escape. I'd never forget him shutting the door. I'd never forget his last words through the narrow crack. "Thank you for your sacrifice, Chloe." When I open my eyes again, I'm back to the day before the zombie outbreak. Leo is gently urging me to hurry up and transfer 150 thousand dollars for the remodeling. It's the money we set aside for the home we plan to live in after we get married. In my past life, he set a trap and drained every cent of my savings. This time, I smile and agree. The only difference is that the 150 thousand dollars is going to build my doomsday bunker. And I'm also planning something special for them. After all, since I get a second chance at life, I should properly thank them for the "kindness" they showed me last time when they shoved me out to get torn apart by zombies.

After being reincarnated as the villain in a story where everyone doted on the heroine, the system appeared. It told me that if I could win over any one of the male leads, I would regain a healthy body and return to my original world. But I failed to win over any of them. There was my adoptive brother, the fake heir, who grew up with me. My rebellious high school deskmate, the real heir, who became a boxer. And my childhood sweetheart, the genius surgeon. Even my own son, whom I carried for ten months. Without exception, they all fell in love with that cold, stubborn damsel while growing to deeply despise me. The system sighed and told me that if I could die at the hands of any one of the male leads, I would be able to see my parents in the original world. In the end, I used every method possible and was finally killed by them, with their own hands. But why did they all go mad afterward?

A security guard caught a snake in our apartment complex and delivered it straight to my door. I was just about to scream when floating comments cut in. [The male lead got dumped and turned back into his real form just to spy on his girlfriend, and he actually got caught? This is funny as hell!] [He got dumped, and his girlfriend hates him. He's probably gonna cry himself to sleep!] [Aww, poor little snake can't curl up on his girlfriend tonight.] The big black snake looked pitiful in the guard's hands. It secretly sized me up with its slit pupils. I tried holding out my hand, and the black snake stared in disbelief. Two seconds later, it obediently rubbed its head against my fingers.

Taking his place on the throne, the King crowned his golden girl his queen. I, on the other hand, was granted two choices—retire from court with a hefty fortune or be his kept mistress in the dark. Choosing neither, I hung myself on the clothesline right outside the laundress quarters. I had been sent back twenty years in time, tasked by the System to conquer four targets. I’d just blown the last target and my final chance to complete the quest. The System notified me that following the death of my flesh, my consciousness would return to the modern world, back to the arms of my family. Just as I closed my eyes, the desperate cries of my name caught my attention.

The yacht that my parents and my younger sister, Amanda Portman, were on exploded in the middle of the sea. None of them survived. Despair and heartbreak fill my senses when I'm faced with an empty home and an astronomical debt. Just as I'm about to jump off a rooftop, I see comments appearing before my eyes all of a sudden. "The truth is, your parents have won a jackpot of 300 million dollars. They've taken Amanda on an overseas trip for some fun!" "Heheh! Amanda doesn't even know that the so-called poor and blind boyfriend, whom she's just broken up with, is the heir of the Wright family. He's just pretending to be poor around her." "Once Amanda comes home after spending all of her money, she will get imprisoned by the enraged Mr. Wright as a form of punishment." "Hey, cannon fodder! Hurry up and die already! I can't wait for Amanda to make her glorious return!" It's at that moment I decide not to die. That night, I barge into Xavier Wright's rented apartment while completely drunk and drenched.

The day I marry Navy Captain Dean Aldridge, I hear his stepsister Shirley Pierce's inner voice. "Diane is so beautiful and graceful. I wish I could be like her, but I'm nothing more than an unwanted burden in this family… "I really adore her, though. I saved up my allowance to buy her a bracelet as a wedding gift, but I'm afraid she'll think it's unlucky and refuse it." In my last life, those words had filled my heart with pity. I'd accepted the bracelet and even taken Shirley under my wing, teaching her to read and write. But not long after my wedding, my health began to deteriorate for no reason. It wasn't until I lay dying that I discovered the truth—the bracelet Shirley had given me was cursed, and she'd deliberately made me hear her inner voice. She'd long been in love with Dean and was determined to make the Aldridge family hers one day. Now, when I open my eyes again, I find myself back on my wedding day.

My dad was a zombie. My mom? Even scarier. She was an uber-powerful mutant. At the crack of dawn, she was already yelling, "Derick Olson! Don't make me come over there! What kind of zombie are you? Glued to your headphones all day—are those audiobooks really that captivating?" I rolled over in bed and promptly fell right off. Scrambling to my feet, I started tidying up my room in a flash, terrified she might actually make good on her threat. "Look at Mr. Hoffman next door," she hollered. "He roams the streets day and night, probably gobbled up more brains than you've read books!"

As I fought a stray dog for a loaf of moldy bread, distinguished guests arrived at the orphanage. They'd come to find the long-lost heir of a wealthy family. After confirming their choice, they donated $100 million to the orphanage and handed out chocolates to every child. My mouth watered as I reached for a box, but glowing messages flashed before my eyes. [Lawrence, show your locket! They're here to bring you home!] [Don't let that impostor steal your birthright. It's yours!] They revealed the truth: the elegant couple were my biological parents, and the poised girl beside them was my fiancée. Yet I clutched my chocolate and ran, aware of their true purpose: they'd come here just for the fake heir. Even if I revealed my locket, they'd not pay me any attention.