Sex Joke Novels & Stories

Elizabeth was amused, "Are we fighting? Why do you say that you're not afraid of me?" "In a way, sex can be regarded as a fight." James thought for a while and said seriously, "Listen, honey. Some of the postures are like those in wrestling, judo, kickboxing, and fencing. You have a pleasant experience when using different postures, right?" Elizabeth was stunned. The words he said seemed to make sense, but his smile and expression were so seductive that she couldn't help but fantasize. "Now you..." Elizabeth thought for a moment, "Stop it!"

Sean gifted his girlfriend with an ironic smile. “You said it yourself the other night, hun. Maybe tomorrow Jim’s meeting his soul mate. Tonight he wants to fuck that piece of ass, and he’s very gonna do so.”

"Wells are you sure you don’t want to consent to me? I will make you feel good I promise.” “Are you being serious?” Wells went pale. He thought he was joking around to scare him. But It no longer looked like a joke. “We are in university and I told you I don’t like Alphas?” “School sex is so hot!” “I don’t like Alphas!” Wells voice rose out of frustration. “So it’s a no I guess.” Xylon let out a sigh. Wells folded his leg that brushed against Xylon’s crotch and he felt something hard between his legs. His pupils rounded and he looked up at his face.

I had to tell him something super not romantic or sexy to break this absurd sexual tension between us. “Dude, you smell like squirrel piss.” I said the first silly thing that popped up in my mind. “What?” he furrowed his brows at me. “Nevermind,” I shook my head. I was losing my mind and making absolutely no sense. You see, it was hard to think or avoid acting like a complete idiot when my body was craving his touch and my panties were a pool of arousal. “If you want to go for a ride, do it! Get his dick good, make him lick you until his tongue is numb and damn, pop that rotten cherry of yours. But just that. Men are trouble and we have something better to do, some places to set on fire.

"That's what's known as a double entendre. We were talking about wine, but the conversation could have easily been about your time in your bed with your mates." Heat flared through my cheeks. "Do people really talk about sex like that? Just out in the open?" She nodded. "Some more than others. Some more tawdry or trashy than others. But yes, sex is a common conversation among humans. Of both genders." Drace came back over, a wan smile on her face. "Remind me to never drink tequila again." Her flowing accent was gone. She rubbed a hand over her belly. "Now I need some food to sop up whatever's left in there." She chuckled. "And it isn't much."

“What are you talking about?” “The sex in the garden—pretending it was with Kai.” Jackie laughed mockingly. “Is it illegal now to have sex? Or are you just jealous because you’re not getting any?” “You were calling his name,” Darina seethed. “Everyone has their fetish. Some girls like calling their ex’s name, and some girls like to watch. I’m not judging you. You’re welcome to watch again—no one else wants you anyway.” Darina tightened her grip.

She teased as he pushed her off growling at her. "That is not funny. You are a baby and shouldn't even know what sex is." He stood up grabbing a cup of coffee, "Me sex yes, you sex no." "You sex yes, me sex definitely." She smirked tossing a look at Jaxon which went unnoticed by the room before looking back at her brother loving the uncomfortable look on his face. She wasn't sure why it grossed him out so much, maybe because her pick was guys like Daniel but he hated talking about sex and her in the same sentence. Always made him uncomfortable and add to the fact he has become like the father in her life she figured that might not make it better.

James’ hand moved from mine down to his crotch, readjusting himself. Huge men were wandering around stroking themselves and searching for the next hole to stick their dicks into. Couples were having shit against the wall, on the floor, in the window seat, and on the desk. Three women were also having shit together. Each table had a bowl of condoms displayed like candy. The grunts, moans, and screams instantly made me damp between my legs, and the room was filled with the smell of latex and cum.

The room cracks with laughter before anyone answers. Axel, sprawled on a beanbag like a Greek god of sarcasm in a black tank, tips his head back and smirks — “I know a lot about horny, not so much about love.” His voice is smug, but there’s an edge in it. The mood shifts, playful and heavy, pulling secrets out like smoke. The air is warm, thick with the sour bite of alcohol and the reckless energy of men who had survived too much and loved too little.

SEX ACADEMY 2: MY INITIATION. At least a dozen guys were tangled together in every configuration imaginable. The air was thick with the heavy scent of sweat, cum, and lube. Low moans and wet slapping sounds filled the space. On the big sectional couch, a muscular guy was getting railed doggy-style by two others, one in his mouth and one pounding his ass, spit-roasted and loving it.