South Park Kyle X Cartman Novels & Stories

But none of that compared to the knot twisting in his gut. Across the room, Kyle was in the middle of it all, as usual. Laughing loud at some dumb story about last weekend’s party, his blond hair messy and sticking up in that effortless way that made half the cheer squad stare. He had his shirt half-on, revealing the lean lines of his torso, the faint tan from summer practices. Dominic had memorized every inch of him over the years. They’d been inseparable since second grade—building tree forts, sneaking video games past bedtime, sharing earbuds on the bus.

In the middle was the best part in Carl’s opinion: a gigantic chocolate fountain. Everyone knew Kyle was stupid rich, with his parents being famous soap opera stars and him being a popular radio show host and all but Carl didn’t know Kyle was living like this. A lot of their classmates were already there, partying and having a good time- Loud cheering could be heard through the right hallway and out comes two people, each in their own gigantic inflatable hamster ball. “Hamster ball wrestling?! This is just like fifth grade graduation!” Thomas says giddily, going towards them until Orville pulls him back by his shirt’s collar.

They’ll see the big picture I’m trying to spell out. “So… That’s uhm…heavy” Kyle mumbles, from the driver’s seat. He and Parker were really close growing up, and he’s an excellent guardian. Seth is probably pissed I asked him to stay home, but someone who is loyal to me and not my father had to.

he groaned before he could finish what he was saying as Kyle had landed a punch on his face. “You think this is funny?” Kyle asked in anger and landed yet another punch on his face before pulling him up by the cloth. “Because of your stupid decision, we are still here, walking like we have nothing better to do and letting the humans go free. We should have killed them when I said so but instead you sent our men back and are busy telling some stupid jokes while I am trying to follow your stupid decision. Is this what you want? Maybe I shouldn’t have asked you to tag along,” he said and pushed his body hard on the ground before getting off him and sitting down at the side, looking furious.

By the time Kyle returned to Kevin, the Delta 1 had an amused look on his face instead of fear. “I know you said they were friendly, but you didn't tell me they were funny,” Kevin said, lifting his hand toward Kyle's face. Kyle’s heart raced, but suddenly, Kevin stopped, and his hand dropped back to his side, as if he had caught himself doing something he shouldn't have. Kyle cleared his throat and tried to pretend it didn't bother him. He motioned toward the kitchen and Kevin followed. Being that he skipped lunch and dinner, the Omega was starving. The smell of jalapeno poppers, and cheese curds had his stomach painfully grinding on itself.

Both Kyle and I spit out our coffee and choked. "Mama," Kyle coughed several times. "Mama, come on! That's not even on my mind!" Kyle said, making me laugh loudly. "Calm down, Kyle," Tita Erly laughed heartily. "It's because of you, Mama!" Kyle said irritably, making me laugh even more. "Savannah, stop laughing!" Kyle said threateningly, but I couldn't stop. "Leave her be, Savannah," Tita Erly said, still laughing. "That's not even on my mind!" Kyle repeated, making me laugh harder because he was so annoyed.

He got out of the car, and I reluctantly followed. We were on a hill overlooking the city. New Haven spread out below us, all concrete and glass catching the afternoon sun. Somewhere down there, Cassien was planning his next move. Somewhere down there, people like Lisa were getting hurt while people like me failed to help them. "My parents never fought," Kyle said suddenly. I turned to look at him, surprised we were having a conversation other than him scolding my ass.

she asked, her concern evident in her tone. Kyle hesitated for a moment, unsure of how to articulate the tumult of emotions swirling inside him. Finally, he met Sophia's gaze, his eyes filled with a mixture of gratitude and uncertainty. "Yeah, I've been thinking a lot about my parents lately," he admitted, his voice tinged with a hint of melancholy. Sophia's brow furrowed with concern. "What about them, Kyle?" Taking a deep breath, Kyle launched into the tale of his parents' ill-fated romance, his words weaving a tapestry of love and tragedy that held his friends captivated.

The bubbly Kyle was spoke up. Kate smacked his ass then. Kyle giggles to show his neat teething. Kate huffed when she handed the strawberry to Autumn. She looked at Kyle then, fatigued by his chatty manners. All she knows is that Kyle is the copy of her and Terrence hinting at an extreme nightmare. Kyle would be more than hers. “If my cousin was here, she’ll be happy to get another female sidekick,” Kyle continued his sentences. “Kyle please … don’t be so rude to Autumn,” Kate mumbled.

Twenty minutes later, we stumbled downstairs to find Kyle in the kitchen, drinking black coffee directly from the pot while Lucas orbited around him like a hyperactive satellite. "Uncle Kyle, did you know that sharks have been around for four hundred million years?" Lucas was saying, adding what appeared to be his fifteenth fact of the morning. "And they don't have bones, they have cartilage, which is the same stuff that's in your nose!" Kyle looked like he'd been hit by a truck. His usually perfect hair was sticking up at odd angles, there were dark circles under his eyes, and he was clutching that coffee pot like it contained the elixir of life itself.