Squidward Funny Novels & Stories

So there I was, stuck in this dark Victorian mansion for a whole freaking century, thinking I'd never get out. Then, out of nowhere, these two gorgeous girls swoop in and rescue me! I couldn't believe it, and we instantly hit it off. They showed me a whole new world I'd only ever imagined, and I was all about living a normal human life.   But just when I thought things were looking up, this vampire named Vivaldi pops up out of thin air, grinning like a possessed Jack-o'-lantern. I mean, a name like Vivaldi is bound to give you the creeps, right? He claimed I had some ancient first blood running through my veins and demanded that I sign some crazy blood contract with him—the kind of deal that comes with some seriously freaky consequences.   Vivaldi was trying to sell me the idea that this blood contract was his only lifeline, the only way to save his skin from something worse than death. But I wasn't some clueless newborn vamp; I knew better than to just dive into something as serious as a blood contract. Those things come with some heavy consequences, and I wasn't about to sign up for that without a second thought.   The problem was, if I didn't go along with his messed-up plan, he promised to make my friends' lives a living hell—the very people I'd started to care about. I was trapped between a rock and a hard place. If I decided to team up with Vivaldi, I'd be keeping him around, which is far from ideal. But if I refused, my friends and the whole town of Shadowvale would be in serious danger.    It felt like I was caught in this impossible situation, like I was trying to choose between two rotten apples.

A modern man from Earth, Caden, woke up and discovered he became a cat! Not only that, he had woken up to a world that can only be found in fantasy stories! What's even more incomprehensible is that he had found himself a mysterious owner! His owner likes to threaten him, likes to make him remember all the goodness he has done for him, likes to touch him here and there---! He is truly pitiful. ----- Evan: I have a cat. My cat likes to stick his tongue out to me, so I pulled it. My cat likes to cry and is very timid but he can kick ass. I love my cat.

"I want you to be mine." Davon purrs into my ear while his hand snakes up to my neck. "I want to be yours, too..." "Good. Then I shall fuck you till you forget your own name, little flower." His hand tightens against my throat.

Out of her mundane life Ava sparked the interest of one of the celestial. Something she read from books and heard from stories but she chose to reject their existence. Will her personal vendetta cost her life or lead her to something better? A mere human who thought she was just caught in the crossfire among the gods. When in fact she was the root of it. 'Words are powerful because you wouldn't know who is listening, huh?' That's what she said on their first meeting. Still forcing herself not to believe even if the proof is right in front of her. His intent was to prove his innocence to her. Yet he entangled himself for a bigger mess, is it really? The mere spectator from before is now part of a dangerous game. His choices will determine not only his fate but of the two worlds and the entire humanity. The more he wanted to break free the more he gets drawn to her. An unexplained phenomenon he felt for the first time since he was created. 'You wouldn't know how it feels unless you go through the same ordeal.' He remembered what his friend told him and realized that he was eating his own words. He was willing to abandon everything just to be with her. Even if it meant being selfish for the first time. He is changing for the worse but can't let go of her now. Not when she already meant everything to him. When the hope of redemption seems impossible, a revelation is unleashed. More questions emerge instead of answers they needed. Will it become the cure or just another poison? What are they willing to sacrifice for their freedom and salvation? Do they even have that choice? Or would they cease to exist leaving no traces behind?

Book two of the Alpha's Phoenix mate! Melissa is a simple illiterate human village girl who dreams of going to school and becoming an architectural designer but her dreams get shattered when she is forced to marry a man five times her age. She finds a way to get out of the marriage and with the help of Kaira, goes to a different country where she meets Dean. Dean is the alpha of Black phantom pack who's been waiting to find his mate but after finally finding her, he gets shattered when he realises that she not only is an innocent little girl but also a human who isn't interested in love

The childs gone. The dreams gone. I've become comfortably numb Valentina Lombardi has been through a lifetime of trauma throughout her years. From her absentee, abusive father who's neglected her all her life to her even more abusive legal guardian who's been the one to traumatize her. A trip to what she sees as her second bedroom, the police station, takes a turn of events with a piece of information she receives that changes everything. Zane Marino, leader of the Marino mafia, and Raul Romano, one of his top men. Dead. The two men who've destroyed her are now out of her life, a miracle to her. Now, she's being thrown into the custody of her eight older brothers she never knew she had. Her biological family. Not to mention, her eldest brother who's now her legal guardian, also happens to be the leader of the Sicilian mafia. Her "father's" pure enemy. What happens when she has to learn to deal with the infamous, ruthless Lombardi brothers, the ones she was raised to hate? Marino through adoption and Lombardi by blood. A dangerous mix. Throw trauma, boys, secrets, and utter chaos into the mix. How will it all play out when her inner demon's come to the surface, making everything unravel right under her two feet?

Lucille is beautiful, smart, kind, and rich. Unfortunately, she is also brokenhearted. Having her heart and whole life shattered to pieces, she vows never to fall in love again. But when love knocks on her door once more, in the form of two drop dead, panty-melting gorgeous men, Lucille decides that this time, she will be the ultimate playgirl. Japer, a playboy, finds it astonishing when a girl did not swoon at the sight of him. More so when she told him she only wants to be friends or if he wants, friends with benefits. What happens when the playboy falls in love and is now the one being played? Boo is a super powerful tycoon. He's rich beyond limits but despite all his power, like his name, he feels like a hollow lifeless ghost. A girl changes all this when she makes him see how fun life can be, especially because he has all the money in the world. But can money buy him her love?

The book was set in the land of Ura. The norm of having a boy as an heir in the lineage of Mugwe's lineage merely came to an extinct. Christine, the last heir in the lineage of Mugwe died bearing a child in another reign of the land. Glad, hope was resuscitated. It was a son, Jason. Jason survived under the extended wings of hope shown by Ariana. She had to carry out the plot as promised. That purported the rise of Jason into power. He conjoined the lands and revolutionised them from the ancient to the modern world. Jason found himself in a love triangle like his mother and daughter, Lily. A line of fate is drawn in each love affair. That transposed Jason to tame it as Woman's Sweet Poison.

“I, Arnold Allirick, reject Daisy as my mate.” He was determined and he was not going to change this at all. He made his decision and he was not going to change his decision at any cost. Her mate rejected her only because she was naive and never learnt using her powers. Being brought up by a human couple, she embraced only human life. It was none of his fault, but Arnold, who was the next Alpha, wanted a mate who was fit to be the next Luna. Without helping Daisy, he rejected her outright. Just because his father wanted it. His father's wish was to have a daughter-in-law who would be as intelligent and wonderful as his wife, and not as naive as Daisy. After breaking up with this rejection, Daisy no longer wanted to move forward. Her wish was to live like a common human and this was the reason why she accepted Arnold's rejection. But the reason for which she let Arnold go, the same reason now seemed useless to her. Daisy agrees to resume her life following the command of the wolf inside her, but the Moon Goddess might not have wanted that. Moon Goddess had to pay for what happened to Daisy, and maybe that's why Ahaz came into her life. Daisy starts liking him even though she does not want to, but the problem was that Ahaz was a Vampire Prince. Will Daisy now be able to take the risk of falling in love with Ahaz after knowing his secret?

I was a regular interior designer until my life took a whirlwind turn when I was hired to renovate the luxurious property of Ethan Blackwood, a powerful billionaire with a reputation for being ruthless and cold. Our first encounter was a clash of wills, with Ethan acting like an arrogant asshole, and me, trying to maintain my composure to keep the job. But beneath his tough exterior, I sensed an undeniable attraction between us. Despite my resolution to stay away from him, fate seemed to draw us together. But just as we started to build something real, a dark secret from my past resurfaced, threatening to destroy everything.